Where my demons hide
by Diana Lua
Summary: Being captivated by a strong and beautiful demon, was just the start of the changes in Lord Heero Yuy's life. The implications of relating with the creature were as dangerous and revealing about things in the world that he had never before dreamed. [AU; Yaoi; SLASH; NC-17; Medieval-ish; Supernatural: demons, angels & dragons] Pairing until now: 2x1x2, 4x3 (lemon 1x2 on!)
1. Demon

**_Warnings:_**

 _- **AU, Yaoi, SLASH, NC-17** , alternating POVs;_  
 _\- Mainly a **romance** , drama with lots of **angst** and some action;_

 _- **Time** : some fictional medieval age, nearly the 10th century (without technology nor gundams);_  
 _- **Place** : Earth with fictional context (not really caring about the real History);_  
 _\- Supernatural contents (demons, angels and dragons)._  
 _\- Some magic like seals, curses and spells (the 'Crimson Spell' kind, nothing like 'Harry Potter' things);_

 _\- Main Pairing: **1x2x1, 13x5** ;_  
 _\- Background pairing: 4x3x4, Solox2, 6+2, 9+6, H+2, R+1, S+5 and maybe more…_

 _\- Theme song: **Demons** by **Imagine Dragons**. (I used the cover version, by  Boyce Avenue, to alternate the POV's);_

 _\- Very important: English is not my mother language and mine is just rubbish (sorry about that!)_  
 _ **Cylina Nightshade** kindly offered to be my beta, so maybe it was not that bad_ _(after the two first chapters)._  
 _ **SFA** started to help me as a sound boarding and also with the language in chapter eight, so it should be even better there._  
 _Comments (of any kind) will be very welcome and helpful to me, I will be very glad if you are willing to share and leave your impressions (even the bad ones)._

 _\- I don't own Gundam Wing and I don't make any money with this. It's just a work for fans and for fun._

 _-_ _I have a schedule guide for myself, but the updates will depend mostly on free time and the reader's support (and the mood of my muse, of course…^_^)_

 ** _Summary:_**

 _Being captivated by a strong and devastatingly beautiful demon, that was captured very wounded, was just the start of the changes in Lord Heero Yuy's life. The implications of relating with the creature were as dangerous and revealing about things in the world that he had never before dreamed._

 ** _About this story:_**

 _Started because a scene - should be in chapter eight - that I wanted to write very much; and this should be a cute one-shot, but I don't know exactly how ended as a twenty-five chapter complex story. I have no control at all over my muse!_

 _It's the first thing I'm writing seriously in English because I wanted to know how the English fandom was, once the Portuguese one died some years ago;_

 _I'm not exactly into the happy ending, but this story was thought to have it since the beginning (for the main characters, at least). So, if you just like happy ending's kind of story, you can be at ease!_

 _Maybe will have some light mention of biblical events and things involving the not traditional viewing of angels, I wanted to treat it very subtle and I have no religious intentions (of any kind). This is just a fictional work and I hope no one will be offended. It's just part of the context, there is nothing religious here._

 _Hope you enjoy it!_  
 ** _Diana Lua_**

* * *

 **Where my demons hide**

 **01\. Demon**

 _(Heero's POV)_

 _"When the days are cold_

 _And the cards all fold_

 _And the saints we see_

 _Are all made of gold"_

I was feeling so damn tired; the sight of the long slushy trail ahead, covered on both sides with dirty snow, made me ask why I still doing this myself. I'm a rich Lord, with lots of possessions. Despite the fact that the security of the people that live in my lands was my responsibility, that was still no reason to do it by my own hands.

But then I remembered the cold gray stones in my castle walls and, also, I remembered that I can't stand staying inside for long. The same way I can't stand staying away for too long.

I wondered if my horse was as tired as myself, when I patted his neck. At least Wing _ **[1]**_ wasn't hurt, just his white coat was dirty with demon's blood.

"Heero, are you ok?"

I just gave a glance to my first commander, Chang Wufei, as he approached on his gray stallion, not understanding his questioning.

"I called you a few times…" he told me in a lowered voice, "I think we should stop and camp here, give the injuries a more thorough check…"

I knew he was referring to my own injuries. Even though I had tried to hide them, Chang was always near me, he probably saw the last big demon that I fought. Compared to him, I felt sloppy, I never could notice his own injuries. He was a very precise warrior.

"I prefer to do it inside the castle walls. Just a couple of hours more..."

He said nothing, but I could feel his determined gaze watching over me, probably trying figure out how bad my injuries were just by the way I was riding.

"It was lucky we were near… this time the attack was different…" I changed the subject to another that bothered me more than the pain in my ribs or the big slash bleeding at my thigh.

"Well, it was a much bigger bunch of demons than we usually see…"

"No, it's not just the amount, this time was different… like a random assault…"

"You mean... like they just got out, without a clue about what to do or what they want…"

The voice came from my other side, from my other commander, Trowa Barton.

He approached with his chestnut horse, making me wonder how he could keep his horse so clean and glossy after those battles; Heavyarms' _ **[2]**_ coat shined in almost an orange light with no traces of black demon's blood. Not just his horse, but he looked like hadn't any wounds at all.

"You felt that too? I think it was… they weren't organized like always…" I turned to Trowa trying to identify if it wasn't just myself with this odd feeling.

"I just had time to notice there were a lot more to kill this time." Chang said. Which didn't surprise me; he hates demons so much that he normally just cares about efficiently killing all the ones who dare cross his path.

"Some village men heard something like thunder just before the demons' horde arrived." Trowa added. Chang and I looked to him trying to see if he believed in those village people or just mentioning some random comments. Knowing him, we already knew he found some kind of truth in that. There are no coincidences in this world.

(...)

An hour and a half later I was very happy with the familiar view of empty fields around my castle. My ribs complained after any small jolt in Wing's stride and my thigh started to ache a lot. I just wanted rest. Instead, the relief of thinking about a hot bath, dinner and sleep in my soft bed didn't last long.

Between the oddness of the main road being empty in the middle of the day, my eyes narrowed after seeing big black marks on the snow descending the hill straight toward the gates.

I rushed Wing in that direction, worried; didn't think about alerting my men. Not that I needed to, between the sounds of the horse's hooves, I heard Chang yell to Trowa follow me at once and shouting orders to others.

I could make out some kind of weird furrows half covered by snow along the road and through the completely open gates. When Trowa and I approached, we could see that something was dragged inside, something big. There were deep scratches on the outside rocks and in the wood on one side of the gate. I doubted that was the fruit of some hunting, even a big bear couldn't offer that kind of resistance. I saw a broken blade and a lot of broken arrows, everything covered with thick demon's blood. That made me shiver thinking of some attack while I and most of my men were out, bringing terrible memories of the last time when something like that happened.

More than quickly we were inside, unhorsed with swords in hand. After all of my concern, everything looked unnervingly calm.

When the stableman took Wing and Heavyarms' reins, I saw his frightened look, watching me bend to take a completely black feather out of one of the furrows in the ground, covered by demons blood. The man shivered making the cross-sign before taking the horses out of the main courtyard.

Trowa was looking closely at the trails leading us to the dungeons. Other than the ground, there were no other signs of violence.

"A demon?" he asked confused, his excellent tracker skills sending conflicting messages "... trapped. A big one, I think."

I was still looking to the black feather curious and already walking to the dungeon's entrance. I handed that feather to him and he look uninterested, throwing it away like he hadn't a clue about what really happened in there. But I was thinking about some really rare kind of demon, one that I knew he even dares to think about.

An unguarded dungeon's entrance was not surprising, seeing that the furrows made on the ground continue on to the stone floor, like it wasn't any difference between through dirt or solid rocks.

Inside, some of the torches were out and the vision of some saints and crosses hanging on pillars made me smirk sadly, thinking about the innocence of those who think that there exists something to hear their prayers or, at least, worry about us from heaven.

We saw three of my men at the bottom of the stairs, in front of the big last cell. They looked relieved to see Trowa and I; they all were fully armed and appearing tired.

The one I left in charge of castle security came to me holding a torch.

"It's a demon, my lord."

With no possibility of seeing the creature in the darkness, I took the torch and headed near the bars. "How many did we lose?" I just left enough men for a standard day of castle's defenses, not enough for any battle, even less for such a powerful demon. Judging by the floor damages I'm not sure if even my best squad could handle it...

"No one, sir."

The answer came from behind, the man not wanting to approach the bars with me. Trowa and I exchanged an unbelieving look. No one?

"Just wounds… nothing really serious…" his voice sounded disbelieving, like just now he was realising how improbable this appeared.

"Why bring it inside instead just killing it?" That seemed like a huge effort that I couldn't imagine any reason for.

"We weren't… successful in killing it… the normal means didn't work, so we used an iron grid to bring it inside…" Again, he was trying to find reasons, I'm sure they didn't have much time to think about at the moment when it all happened. For sure I can imagine they probably wouldn't be able to kill it, but… none lost? No fatal wounds? No escaping from a simple iron net? That didn't make any sense.

I just stuck close the bars and lifted the torch, consumed by curiosity. Trowa brought another one and I finally, with the yellow light of fire, could find it in the shadows.

First, it was just a big deep black shadow in the corner of the cell, when my eyes adjusted to the flickering light, I could see the big black wing covering almost all of demon's body. This wasn't a common black skinned wing; it was dirty but it was a soft graceful feathered black wing. The realization that the feather that I found before was truly from it, made me lose my breath in surprise. Could it be…?

"Small…"

It was the whispering of Trowa by my side, and I almost didn't register it. I realized that the demon was a lot smaller than I could ever guess. But I wasn't thinking right anymore, in that moment I was completely drowned by a sparkle of bright that I could see in a pair of hiding eyes.

The fire wasn't reflecting on the completely black eyes that I expected; the fire was reflecting in bright purple-blue eyes.

The creature's body was shrunken in pain, almost all hidden by the left wing. The other one was falling oddly against the wall, a mucky broken leg revealed on floor showing small spots of white skin.

"Call Chang, I need tranquilizers right now…" I heard my own voice shouting.

The small demon retracted itself even more if possible. Those hypnotizing indigo eyes brightening right straight to me and what I saw inside made my heart squeeze hard.

 _"Your eyes, they shine so bright"_

 _(TBC...)_

* * *

 _Diana Lua_

 _Diana C. Figueiredo_

 _Written in: May/2016 - Published: May/29/2016_

 _Beta reader: Cylina Nightshade (Sep/2016)_

 _Last change: Sep/04/2016_

* * *

 **Notes:**

 _[1] They all have Gypsy Horses (because I love horses, and I love even more those big hooves with long fur) named after their Gundams. And I tried find the more fitting horse colors to match them too._

 _[2] After all, was really strange to call a horse Heavyarms, but what could I do? All the others are paired with their names, I couldn't change just one._

* * *

 _ **#** This chapter was updated in July with some grammar corrections by  Maria Angela, and again in September with a full review by **Cylina Nightshade** ^_^ that offered to be my beta reader. Hope the english was better now;_

 _ **#** In my profile has a link to my facebook public album that had some images from the horses that inspired me, and also a fanart from the demon._

 ** _So, looks interesting? :)_**


	2. Wounds

_-_ _This chapter was finally reviewed, hopefully is better now. Thanks a lot to **Cylina Nightshade** (love you!). She was very kind for look at it with so many mistakes._

 _-_ _I forgot to mention before, but the 'action' (like fights and things like that) will take a while. This is mainly a love history and the action is just background. I think will start around the eighth chapter._

 _\- In my profile have a link for some drawing if someone has interest to see._

 _\- Maybe Duo will look like a little OOC, but I actually tried making him more sarcastic and mischievous than exactly happy, because just didn't fit in the plot. He is a kind of serious and will show a harsh background of him, maybe more the Shinigami side of him._

* * *

 **Where my demons hide**

 **02\. Wounds**

 _(Duo's POV)_

 _"When your dreams all fail_

 _And the ones we hail_

 _Are the worst of all_

 _And the blood's run stale"_

When I regained consciousness, the first thing I noticed was the pain. I'm used to feeling it, but I've never had broken a wing before… hurts like hell. For something made of feathers and hollow bones, it is much too heavy to be sustained when the main bone is cracked; I never was truly aware of that weight before.

My eyes were heavy and my mouth cotton dry. I sensed that I was alone. Not needing to worry about others around was just a small relief when even the edges of my mind were too tired to think in straight lines.

I don't know if it was just exhaustion of my body or something else. Maybe just all of my essence was tired of existing in this world. I haven't seen a point to it for a long, long time.

If at least he hadn't forced me to make that promise at the end...

I felt I had no place, on earth or even beneath it. And, being a demon, of course not above it.

I had nobody as well. Death is too close to me to spare anyone who dares get close. I had nothing left but some memories, those that end in pain, and an old sacred gift that I'm not allowed touch without burning my skin. I don't even dare to dream anymore. All dreams I had eventually come to fail. Maybe I'm not allowed to have them at all, never had.

There was no day when I'm not asking myself about a reason to still be alive. Doesn't matter how much I try to reach this answer, it was stuck on the horizon… Out running my seeking fingers at each step I take.

I lived so many days, years, decades, centuries… seems like I felt that way since the beginning of time. But I knew, even though those memories were so distant now, there was a time that I felt different. There was a time that someone brought that horizon to me...

The pain in my wing was too much. I needed to move myself, try to find a better position. I was completely laid on my stomach on a freezing stoned floor.

I wasn't surprised to be in a different place after being drugged. But I was surprised to be in a clean place. There were some traces of my running blood on the stones, but nevertheless still clean and empty of dirty and old miscellany like the dungeons that I've seen before. It also didn't smell like those labs where the humans usually keep the sort of supernatural things to make potions and weapons. Actually, it's some kind of bathroom, with a big tub full of water and not at all like a place to keep a demon in.

That made me think about what they want from me.

I found myself oddly a bit cleaner too. My right leg was broken in a big fracture with the bone exposed through the muscles and skin; now my pants were cut under the knee, showing that the bone was set, the lacerated skin clean and bandage tied strongly.

The burns on my skin, especially those caused by the holy water thrown on me, were covered by a kind of yellow cream. The scratches on my face and arms were cleaned of dirty and stale blood. And even my wings… they were damp like they had been washed.

All that was very, very odd. I was so sure that those men were just looking for a way to kill me. So, why all this caring about my wounds?

I was feeling unkempt wearing my claw slashed pants and the rest of my leather pectoral harness that was just holding itself on by a few straps.

Also, my wing was still hanging loose on my back and I didn't have any idea about what to do to make it better. Probably not able to do anything by myself. The fracture was in the first main bone near my scapula and I barely could see the wound.

There were some rags on the tub's rim. The water was cold, but it would be better to finish cleaning myself… I had no idea what would come next, better not to even think about…

I learned the hard way that it is better to not start suffering inside your head before the genuine thing starts for real. It was just difficult to convince my brain to stop the wheels spinning hard like now.

Doing something about my long hair was a bit of work. Getting out the rest of the dried blood and who knows what else that was caught in it made me dizzy. My sight blurred and I needed some minutes to rest, letting my head lay on the side of the tub.

If I had my blade, the source of my power, I could heal myself so quickly that I wouldn't even notice all this torturous pain. But the demon I was fighting was quite powerful, and he knew how to break the connection with my scythe and I ended losing it. He was bigger and stronger, but I was faster and smarter. It was tough and when I finally turned him into ashes I just thought I would die slowly.

Until being found by these humans.

I was exceedingly weak now, but that didn't mean that I couldn't beat every one of them, or all at once. I could when they found me and I still could now.

I opened my eyes again to find some clothes folded behind the rags that I didn't see before. There is a loose pair of pants. I was relieved to tear off the rest of what I was wearing, even though it was awkward to think that was left there on purpose for me.

I freed myself of the rest of my ruined armor too, carefully taking off a small leather package and putting it inside the pocket of my new pants. This was my only treasure.

With my chest bare, I could see the big cut on my ribs that had been bugging me a lot. It went from my upper rib until my waist, being deeper on the end. It was fully covered by my dried black blood. And had the tip of the other demon's blade inside my flesh.

Even carefully, when I removed the blood's crust more came out. That made me rethink if touching in there was a good idea. When I reached the piece of metal in there, the pain made me see stars… and my head became weak. I didn't want to, but I knew I was slipping to the sleeping land again.

(...)

For the second time that I woke, if possible, I was feeling even worse. Exhausted wasn't enough to describe me. My mind was blurred and had some strange burning sensation on the edges of my body.

The room now was fully lightened by morning. There were windows tall and narrow blocked with iron bars, I didn't notice those before. An easy way to escape, just needed to break the bars. However, from the light position, this room was not located on the ground, I probably would find some height. That made things difficult when you are not able to jump or fly.

I was not even sure if I could manage to walk. My leg was wrapped now, but I didn't think that would be enough to support me with that fracture.

My instincts started screaming when I heard steps near the door. I should have heard it before being so close. I tried to move fast and the pain hit me like a hammer. I looked for ways out or wherever I could use for shelter. It was a small room, so I didn't have a lot of choices. Just hoped that they really didn't try anything.

The steps stopped but, before the door was opened, I heard another person rushing and some kind of discussion began.

"What the fuck are you doing?" one angry voice shouted. "I made those tranquilizers thinking you wanted to keep the creature down until we find a way to get rid of it…"

So, homemade tranquilizers. That could explain the dizziness that I was feeling, if they didn't know what they were doing. Besides, I'm not a common demon anyway, that means unknown side effects.

"That is what I asked for," the answer came from a calm low voice. I could tell this one was standing in front of the door. There was a silence between them. I couldn't say for sure, but it had an odd feeling to it.

"But instead, you took care of its wounds, you freed it off the chain and brought it to a room inside your castle. Are you out of your mind!?"

"It was too injured. I couldn't leave it there…"

"Are you hearing yourself?" That one was not shouting anymore, but the voice was truly worried. Should be good that they feared me, even in my poor conditions.

"Wufei, it isn't a common demon. You saw its appearance?" Shit. What did that mean? Easy to say I hadn't a demon's appearance, but humans normally just assume that I was a never seen before kind. Not that I let myself been seeing a lot. I avoid as much as I could get out of hell.

"No, I didn't see it yet. But I saw the damage that it left behind. It's a fucking really strong one. What will you do when it wakes up and decide that it's time to go and kill us all?"

That was a reasonable thought, something they should expect from a demon. So maybe they didn't try to do anything stupid that makes me...

"It won't!"

The answer came so fast and sounded so sure that made me shiver. Or maybe I was shivering because the rib cut that was aching and bleeding again. What the fuck did this one near the door think he knows about me to say that with so much conviction.

"Look, Chang, I know how strong it is even so wounded, but he deliberately didn't hurt any of our men. So it probably would not…"

"Deliberately?"

The tone was incredulous and the other snorted clearly annoyed with the questioning.

"I made a decision. It's done. I will shoulder the risks."

"Will you? Can you shoulder the risks by yourself? What make you think you can defeat or stop it if you're wrong?"

"I don't believe it will do something against us." That wasn't an answer that I was expecting. How could he make all those assumptions about me?

"I don't believe what I'm hearing. You better not be expecting some gratitude for taking care of it." There is no answer, and I couldn't figure out what was in the air between them.

"It is without its power, otherwise it would have healed itself and escaped."

"So let me kill it while we still have a chance. If the others means failed maybe my sword can kill it, it is a demon after all."

"Now I'm the one who can't believe what I'm hearing. You speak of taking advantage of its weakness… that is not honorable, Chang."

This discussion was altogether very odd. I couldn't understand the person who was defending me like that. And after that last sentence, there was a spreading guilt feeling coming from the other one. Who thinks about honor when non-human creatures are involved after all? I wished that my thoughts were not so messy, to better understand what was coming from each of them.

"I think it is a Shinigami…"

Now that could explain some things. He saw my vambrace, he saw the broken chain and he saw the two silvered words written on the black metal. He was able to understand, and also knew that a Shinigami's source of power was his blade that normally was chained in. He knew a lot more about demons than common humans. They should be hunters…

"But also, I think it is a fallen angel."

Shit shit shit. Was the word repeating inside my mind.

I checked the leather straps that hold the armor, wondering if he might have taken it off, to try to see the birthmark on my wrist. Probably not; the laces were still tied tightly in my own way. Even there was nothing there that he could understand.

If I had any clue about what that could mean to them… about what they possibly could have interest in me? I looked to the window asking myself how far I could bear to go, in this shape, in daylight.

"It doesn't need power or weapon, it can smash us with its bare hands. And if it is a fallen angel, you know that we can't kill it."

"Yes, I know. So that's off the table."

"So, what do you want from it? Why not drop him off some place far from here? There is no difference if it once was an angel, they are selfish and arrogant creatures..."

I was glad they didn't have illusions about the true nature of angels. Nothing of the celestial kindness and goodness, thank you very much. I hated hearing that bullshit. Though that still didn't explain why he was interested in me.

My vision was blurred and my head tired of wondering.

"I know." there was a sigh "I… know. Let's drop this for now. I've been thinking... and need you to find and bring someone here to me."

They were walking away and I couldn't hear more. I didn't know if I felt relieved.

I looked down to the cut on my ribs that was still bleeding. I reached for the metal inside but my fingers were a little clumsy and I thought it wasn't a good idea try take it out for now.

I let my head fall back, looking at the ceiling. The question that Chang guy made for the other one remained in my mind. What did the other want from me? If he knows about fallen angels, it wasn't a way to kill me that he was looking for. I tried to remember, searching through the feelings that I felt between them, but the pain was too much, I couldn't focus on anything.

(…)

I woke with the sound of the door opening and had some panicked seconds of not being able to remember that I let myself sleep.

Shit! Again.

I was caught completely off guard, couldn't move and needed to blink several times until I was able to see through the fog in my mind.

It was the the man that shot me in the dungeon. Deep dark blue eyes and brown tousled hair. I could notice Asian traces on his face. I wasn't sure what part of Earth I ended up in during the fight, but most of the others humans that I saw weren't Asians.

I couldn't help but feel a little vulnerable. If he tried something… he probably would end up hurt. I couldn't do much to avoid hurting him if I needed to protect myself.

"I brought water, hot and clean…"

He said and I recognized the voice, was the one that defended me during the previous discussion. That should make things easier; he probably would not attempt anything and I could have some answers.

I was still avoiding moving, partly because of the pain. Partly because… well, I haven't any idea about what was going on here, and my thinking was not in the best shape.

If he was expecting something from me, he didn't wait long, just took two buckets with water and placed them inside, closing the door. He looked to the pants I was wearing and appeared satisfied. It wasn't that he smiled or anything, just some brightening in his eyes. I had a feeling that he just wasn't the smiling type.

I tensed a bit, lifting my right arm to grab the tub edge. I would need the support to stand up, if I need to defend myself. His eyes flew to mine, kind of surprised, but he stayed where he was, like he was expecting me to move or say something.

"I won't hurt you," he said after a while. I saw his eyes on the cut on my ribs; it was visible now that I lifted the arm. "That will need a lot of care."

No shit! Like I needed to be told the obvious. But, he looked truly concerned, waiting for something... That he didn't find. He bent to take the buckets' handles and walk towards me. He was brave, I need to recognize. He picked a clean rag, soaking it in the water and handed it to me. Just like that... like it was a common gesture and not like I was a demon.

I didn't really feel any threat coming from him, so I took it. The warmth on my wound was relieving, I couldn't stop from closing my eyes. I think he took this as some sign and sat, taking some minutes just watching me clean that.

"I'm Heero Yuy, lord of these lands."

I continued my task with no words.

"Do you have a name?"

He should know how important a name is; no way I would give him information like that. I ignored him and kept cleaning. When I removed all the blood, the tip of metal appeared and I shivered to touch it.

"Hn," he grunted and dared to move even closer, but not enough that I could reach him with my hands, smart guy.

"Why don't you let me take care of it…" he offered. I looked at him. What the fuck? My mind was kind of blurred. "And your wing too…"

I really didn't know what else to do. I barely could drag myself the way I was now. For sure I couldn't take care of my wing by myself without my power. But to put trust into someone... was hard. Specifically knowing he should be a demon hunter and having no idea about his true intentions.

"I never broke a wing before…"

That slipped, I had planned to say nothing at all. I turned my face away, by the corner of my eye I could see him doing that subtle thing again, softening his face almost imperceptibly like he had won.

"Can I get near? Just to look better..."

His voice was careful and low. I forced myself to stand up using the wall and the tub to balance myself. For a minute I thought I couldn't. My vision became spotted, the edges darkened. He flinched and I felt him reprimand himself for not coming to help me.

I don't know how I managed to sit on edge of tub.

"Looks painful." He said coming close to look at my wing.

Really?! He didn't have any idea but would not hear this from me.

"How…?" he looked to me almost like he was apologizing. "I would have helped it earlier if I knew how…"

I shrugged to him, I had no idea either. "Whatever… releasing a little weight will help enough…"

I wanted to tell him to do it quickly. I was already dizzy before and standing up was making it worse, but I didn't want to show him more weakness.

He didn't say anything but moved to grab some box with medical stuff that was already in the room, which I hadn't noticed until then. He turned to me showing his hand holding a syringe with some liquid inside. I froze, startled with wide eyes.

He looked sheepishly to me. "That will be painful… I promise to use just little..."

"No!" I immediately replied. I wasn't sure what I was expecting, but… it wasn't for him to just let go so easily, putting it back in a very visible place, like he was assuring me that he wouldn't use it. Anyway, I wasn't afraid of the pain. Still, I wasn't sure what was in this drug they made. It probably was what was making me so sick.

This idiot human was trying to gain my trust… Why? Was the golden question. I heard him set out some bandages and medical things that I couldn't figure out.

I let him work on my back, staring at the gray rocks on the wall. I was just stiff and very tense, couldn't let my guard down. But actually that didn't matter, because, once he put the parts of my bone together, I saw stars. He was saying something about the fracture and the way he would wrap it. The blood rushing in my ears made me deaf. I just tried to hold on and bear it.

I closed my own eyes so hard that when I felt him touching my arm, I had some seconds of only seeing all black.

"Are you alright?" I finally managed to discern what he was saying. My eyes found his. He looked concerned… strangely it was about me and not about the cracks I unintentionally made in the stone wall where I was holding.

I nodded and felt ashamed, knowing I wasn't well enough to hide my own pain.

"I thought we should wrap around your torso… it will ease the weight pressure a little…"

I moved myself a little making room for him place the wrap around me. I was very happy to not be capable of blushing, he was very close. I could look better at his face and intense dark blue eyes through the tousled hair. He was easy on the eyes.

Fuck, there was something really wrong with me.

He was very careful, placing the wrapping on left side off the big cut. When he finished, despite the shitty sensation of have my wing completely bound on my back, the pain was much more bearable.

"Thanks…" I whispered.

I couldn't see his face, but I could feel a victorious sensation coming from him. I should start a score, just to have some measure of how much he thinks he was winning with me.

"So, do you have a name?"

I completely ignored his question and I sat again in the tub edge, suddenly too tired.

I felt his cobalt eyes weighing on me for a bit, then he turned to grab a small pair of scissors and a needle… yeah, stitches on that fucking cut. Looking at my ribs made me not want to fuss in there. But, probably, keeping a broken blade stuck in your flesh wasn't a good idea.

In a moment of anger, I held the metal with my fingers and rip it off me all of a sudden. It felt like hellfire burning all my left side. I barely heard the 'Fuck' that he said.

It took some minutes for the burning sensation to lessen a little and the room to stop spinning around my head. I was seated on the floor, and didn't even remember sitting down. Probably he guided or helped me, because he was sitting very close, pressing and cleaning the running blood with warm water. It was a nice sensation. I let my head lean back incapable of doing anything.

I was still holding the metal. With a sharp shake of my head, I forced myself to look at the spear tip; it had something green coating the shining metal. I threw it in the trash pile that once was my pants and armor.

"Are you a fallen angel?"

He was just trying to make me stay awake, I felt it, but that definitely made me angry. I hate angels with all my will.

"I'm a demon!" I barked back with a strength in my voice that didn't think I was capable of in that situation. He looked frightened a bit, at least. But it didn't take long for that feeling to fade on him, even though I still looked angry.

"Not born… not a real one…" he dared. I asked myself how he could feel so free to say that.

"Maybe I should show you how real I am…"

He didn't feel threatened like I would like. Just continued with the task of aiding me. Once he thought the bleeding stopped, he grabbed the needle. I let my head fall back again, closing my eyes, my arm lifted resting on the tub edge. I could almost ignore completely the pinches of the needle and the wound pain every time he squeezed it to close the parts. Truly I wasn't sure how conscious I was.

"You need rest to regain some strength..."

I opened my eyes just a little. He just saw me break that solid stone wall, how dare he think I'm feeble. Even if I was really feeling weak and sick right now.

"Easier to drink your life out to heal me…" I hissed showing my two pointed teeth.

"What's stopping you?"

He didn't buy my threat, the second one. His eyes were true and blue, an intense look straight at me. I closed my own. That burning feeling on every edge of my body was increasing a lot now. I wished it was night; maybe in darkness I could feel less disoriented.

I heard him stand up and his steps were in a different direction than the door he came in before.

"Will you say your name now?" I continued ignoring him. He stopped and I felt his defeated feeling. Score to me, if I was capable to keep a simple counting.

"At least… rest." He said and I heard a sound of another door opening before he left.

I opened my eyes with a huge effort to set them on another open door that lead to a room with a huge bed in it. For a minute, I couldn't believe it, but the thought to rest properly in a good bed seemed nice. I looked at all the stale blood covering the hard and cold stoned floor... no doubt much better than that.

I wondered again about what he could want from me, trying to gain my trust, getting close...

But before moving any muscle to get in that room, I just slipped away to my la-la land of sleep with no clue how I let him be that close to me… much more than anyone in a long, long time.

 _"Don't get too close"_

 _(TCB...)_

* * *

 _Diana Lua_

 _Diana C. Figueiredo_

 _Written in: June/2016 - Published: Jul/20/2016_

 _Beta reader: Cylina Nightshade (Nov/16)_

 _Last change: Apr/30/2017_

* * *

 ** _How it was going?  
_** ** _Hope the plot wasn't boring. :)_**


	3. Blood

**Where my demons hide**

 **03\. Blood**

 _(Heero's POV)_

" _I want to hide the truth_

 _I want to shelter you_

 _But with the beast inside_

 _There's nowhere we can hide"_

Even being very tired I didn't get enough sleep at night. I tried think about my duties, but couldn't get my mind away from the demon. I had to hold myself back to not go back to his room.

The prior morning I sent Wufei to find a healer that I had heard about, someone who supposedly could cure anything. The rumors said that he wasn't human or made some pact long ago and became hell bounded. Also I needed to keep him away, he has a profound rage of inhuman creatures and he probably wouldn't give up pressing me to get rid of him. But I… can't. At least, not until I figure out what this urge is in my guts.

In addition, Trowa started patrolling around, looking for the lost weapon. The demon said nothing, but I know how the Shinigami's powers work, so he should have had a weapon with him. I'm hoping he lost it nearby the castle. If Trowa finds it… he will be able to heal himself, but also he will be able to go away. And that was what bothered me the most.

I was really puzzled by my feelings. I still couldn't answer, even to myself, what I wanted from him. Why I was so interested on him. What I felt for him. Until now, I just wanted him to feel better, although, not enough to go away. Contradictory, I know, but couldn't help myself about feeling that way.

His appearance was surely angelical. Long chestnut hair, smooth white skin and those shining purple-blue eyes. At first sight, the only thing that said he wasn't an angel was the black color of his wings and nails. Still, he was a vision.

Fallen angels were really rare, because they couldn't be killed, just a few were expelled from heaven by God in the beginning of time. Well, that was what has been told. Then, of course, I was curious if I guessed right, but he has something more… something that I saw inside his eyes lightened by firelight.

He let me help him a little the day before. Mostly because he was very wounded, I could see him wandering the whole time. Maybe it was the blood loss… I didn't have any idea how to continue helping him.

He talked about drinking my life, but even assuming that blood drinking worked to heal him, I couldn't let him kill someone to heal himself. Also… I had a feeling that he didn't want to, or else he would have already done it. I saw his pain… and knew he wouldn't bear it, if he found this way easier.

I simply couldn't stop my mind from spinning around him, and there was no way I could rest a little more, so I got out of bed. I tried not rushing myself when I got dressed and ate some breakfast. I finished at the library looking through a pile of papers , but it was still early, there was no message from Wufei yet and Trowa was out patrolling. My legs carried me back to his room, holding and turning the key inside my pocket while I was walking.

I entered by the bedroom side, wishing he was asleep, and had a moment of panic when I didn't see him. I had froze for a instant, when I heard some sound coming from the bathroom; a pained sound. I stormed into there.

"What happened?" I asked to nobody. He was sprawled out on the floor, on a big pool of blood, not conscious.

I didn't think, I saw the stitches ripped off, making that cut in his ribs bigger than before, and just knelt beside him touching his neck looking for a pulse. My mistake. In a heartbeat his hand was on my neck, nails bruising my skin in an iron grip, my air was gone. I looked into his eyes and didn't see any recognition, took some time for his vision to come into a sharp focus. He recognized me and took another heartbeat for him to release me.

I fell on all fours, the air came back in a rush, I couldn't help but gasp for it, sucking in what I could and didn't seem to possibly get the air in fast enough. Needed all my concentration to not pant, taking slow and steady breaths instead. My throat was feeling crushed and my chest was on fire.

When I could calm down, I noticed my hands in the blood pooled on the floor. That made me try to concentrate on him.

"What…?" I croaked, incapable of getting words out.

He was still lying down, eyes barely open, looking at me. "Poison…" his voice came out ragged, shocking me.

"Fuck! How...?"

"The… sword…"

I threw myself into looking for that piece of metal that was inside his flesh. Found it in the trash pile and when I rubbed the stale blood off it, I found some green residue stuck on it. Probably some poison, started spreading when he removed the blade.

I looked at him pale and trembling, his skin was sticky and sweaty. I felt horrible, I left him alone suffering all night long. If I had come checking on him before…

"You have any idea what it is?"

He blinked and shook his head in negative. Fuck! Dealing with poison was already hard enough when knowing what it was. Without information... I had no idea what to do to help him. If Chang was here… like hell he would agree to help anyway.

My thoughts were interrupted by the pained sounds, low and painful, getting under my skin, making my heart clench.

"Tell me what to do." I pleaded to him touching his arm.

He frowned and for an instant his eyes focus on mine. "Leave me alone…" I didn't know if it was his ragged voice or the words that cracked me. He closed his eyes, whole body trembling feverish hot. I couldn't understand… he was giving up? Giving up on life? Why? No way I will let it happen. At least not that easily.

I was scared for him, but also, was scared by my own feelings. I couldn't organize my thoughts, just knew that I needed to do something.

"I will be back soon…" I said and was almost sure he hadn't heard, shivering, laid down on floor with closed eyes. I ran out, shutting the door without bothering about locking it.

Didn't take more than a minute to climb down the stairs, shouting on the way for the servants to bring more hot water and bandages.

After a big demon attack about eight years ago I started to use the room beside library as a stash. We kept in there every single thing that has some use against demons specially. Had an entire shelf with antidotes for poisoning, originally from animals, like snakes, until the common demons that we fought with frequency. I just had a small clue about how strong he was, for sure the demon which he fought was equally strong or more. Not one of those we usually see, probably there wasn't any antidote for this specific type. Even if I had the poisoned blade fragment... I had no idea how... to do it. Nevertheless, all of them were made for human use. I was not sure if any of it would work for him, more than that, I was worried about making it worse.

I ran until I reached the stable, grabbing a saddle and started strapping it on Wing. I wasn't aware of my own actions until I was hit by logic. What I was doing? Going to where? Looking for whom? Wufei was too far, even if he was already coming back by now he probably won't be back until the next day. The nearest village didn't have someone with this kind of expertise. Even if it did, how to explain that what I needed was to 'heal' a demon?

I should go and bring Chang back anyway, that will take a while and I didn't know if he could bear the wait.

I was there with all those thoughts, leaning on Wing's body letting my forehead touch him, unconsciously patting his neck. The saddle half way strapped forgotten. I wished his calm and warmth could put my mind at ease. I need to calm down, there must be some way… because if he… I...

Hoofbeats take me out of this daydream. I ran to find Trowa coming back with the patrol. I felt like my lungs were squeezed until now and were suddenly released when I saw him holding a blanket rolled like a ball.

His eyes were wide open and he looked frightened to me.

"What the hell?" he unhorsed quickly and grabbed my arm dragging me inside.

"You found it?" I asked, the library's doors weren't closed yet.

"Are you ok…?" He took a long look at me. "What in the hell happened with you?"

Took me a moment to look myself and find that black blood was all over my clothes and my arms, my throat should be bruised and clawed.

"... an accident. My fault."

He came near and pulled the collar of my shirt looking under it. For sure I was clawed. Trowa was a man of few words, much like me. We grew together and he knows me very well.

"Yes, I found it," he said walking toward the big table. "You guessed right…" he opened the blanket, showing a scythe. Even though it was dirty and stained by blood the metal shone like no human weapon could. "A shinigami."

Smaller than what I expected. The blade was the length of my arm; there was no junction between the blade and the snath. There was chain coming from the bottom of the grip; the last link was broken.

I took it and would have walked away toward to the demons room. Who did I want to deceive? I probably would have run up the stairs, if Trowa hadn't grabbed me.

"He is dying. Some poison in his ribs… If he gets it back…"

"You can't!"

"Trowa listen…"

"No, you listen. I thought Chang was exaggerating… but you truly are…"

He was standing between me and the door, still grabbing my arm. The only thing in my mind was to heal the demon. Trowa was taller and faster than me but I was stronger.

I just couldn't believe I was considering picking a fight with him. Like he said: What the hell was wrong with me? I was so confused, that urge, that pressure on my chest, I couldn't tell what it all meant.

"He won't do anything… he's in pretty bad shape… he needs to heal himself or..."

"Or what? He'll die?"

I looked away, suddenly those green eyes bore straight into me. What could I say? Yes. I was worried that he would die. I was frightened by this idea. I just want to spend some time with him.

"He should die, Heero. That is what we do, kill demons."

"He's a fallen angel!"

"It's the same, just stronger. If that is true, what about how fallen angels can't be killed? He told you something?"

"He told me he was a demon when I asked. But..."

His grip increased on my arm. "It's not just your life that's at risk here."

"There is no risk, at all." I just wished they, he and Chang, could see a little bit that there was no danger coming from him. If he wanted to harm anyone, he would not have been caught in the first place.

"You don't know that."

I rubbed my hand over my face. Shit, how could I prove this for him. I growled and he still impassively blocked the way. He took a breath before using the only thing that could really convince me.

"If it is about the lives of others, the decisions you make cannot be based just on personal feelings. Cause if it's a wrong one... you know pretty well the consequences."

He didn't need to be more clear. I knew that pretty well, like he said.

For a moment my mind was flooded with the memories about what happened eight years ago and the guilt made my knees weak. He played dirty bringing that up. But he was right and I handed the scythe to him.

If I was confused before, now I was completely overwhelmed. There were a bunch of people living in the castle and surrounding area; I couldn't risk their lives just because of a feeling that I can't even explain.

I pressed my forehead, "Send…" could felt the beginning of a tension headache, "Send two of our fastest men to rush Chang. I want him back with or without that healer." Chang could make some antidote, though he would not agree with me from the start, that's for sure. I wondered if the demon would hang on until he came back.

"At once," he answered and stepped aside.

I left immediately, going back to the room. I was distressed because there was nothing that I could do for him now. A bucket and some bandages were waiting in front of the door, the water already cooled down.

The sight of him dropped unconscious on the floor made my heart break. Shivers crossing all his body, his face was twisted in pain, covered by sweat. I tried to call him, remembering my mistake before, but was not answered.

I soaked a rag in the water, glad it was cold now, and started to clean the sweat on his face. He was burning, the lips cracked dry. I brushed his bangs away to place the moist rag in his forehead.

Only then did his eyes open a bit, lost, wandering like he couldn't see. His hands tried to grab me, like before, losing the first grip. There was almost no resistance when I grabbed his arm and held down preventing a second one.

"Hey…" I wanted to ask his name again, "Tell me what to do… please…" I wasn't sure if he could hear or understand, his eyes still wandered blindly.

"There is nothing to do…" the voice came in a whisper.

I wanted to say that there was. But inside my head there was a looping litany between the scythe and that 'what if'. I felt completely powerless, taking the rag to soak it in the cold water again.

"Just hold on… one of my men will be back soon. He will be able to make some antidote…"

Looked like he couldn't listen. I placed the cold rag in his forehead, feeling it getting warm immediately. His muscles were all cramped; he was shivering like his joints were loose. I noticed he was almost flat on his back, crushing the fractured wing with his weight. It should be painful. I took the pillows from bed and arranged them behind his back. He just let me touch and move him without a word, but the shivering faded a bit making me curse for not noticing that before.

"You can die?" I asked while soaking the rag again. If he couldn't, like what was told about fallen angels, he just needed bear the pain until Chang arrives.

On his lips appeared a shadow of smile, like that was some silly question.

"Of course…"

Shit. So what we knew about fallen angels was wrong, or he wasn't one. What other explanation could explain his mixed form? Didn't matter at all, in that case, he won't make it. I doubted Chang would be back before late in the night.

"I can't let you die…"

"Why…?" his voice was very weak.

I didn't know. I just couldn't. I hadn't an answer.

" shoulda... died... long ago…" He closed his eyes, trembling hard.

"You don't look like the type to give up easily… You fought so hard with that other demon… can't believe you are just giving up..."

"No… can't… give up… I promised…" he opened his feverish eyes looking toward the window. A promise? That was a strange saying for a demon. "Just… nothing to do... without 'scythe… I have no power…"

My guts twisted hard. Even though, Trowa words couldn't be erased from my mind. The memory of finding the small body... the preparations to bury... My mistake, my fault, I trusted without really knowing… how could I?

Just the day before he had a stubborn attitude, looking at me full of suspicion, trying to threaten me… "And what about blood…?" I remembered suddenly.

He turned his eyes trying to focus on me.

"You said yesterday something about drinking my life. You are a demon, so if you drink human blood your power can be restored temporarily… and you can heal yourself, am I right?"

One crazy idea was taking form in my mind. Took some time before he said anything, but when he opened his mouth showing his sharp teeth, though he tried to hiss, no sound came.

"Yeah… could drink… ya life…"

Something in the way he said it made me wonder if he was avoiding it. Why he hadn't done it yet? He never considered it. The demons do this a lot during the invasions, no survivors after. Maybe, just maybe, he was worried about me? I wanted to believe it. The regular demons probably didn't bother at all, but maybe he could do it without killing me.

"Would you tell me your name before you kill me, at least?"

For just a heartbeat his eyes come finally to focus on me, he looked truly surprised.

"Take mine…" I felt he wouldn't hurt anyone, then maybe, if I was right, he could leave me alive. That way I was risking just my life. I swallowed and extended my arm toward him. "Take it if will help… and if you can, don't kill me..."

He's still looking hard into me. His eyes are dark, opaque, the pupils dilated. He didn't answer, or move, just looking, like trying to read me somehow.

"I'm giving it to you. No need tell me your name… if you don't want to." I smile at him, trying to remember the way he looked at me in the dungeon, the way I saw him, what I felt.

His eyes moved to my wrist, the veins bulging, beat modulated by the blood inside. But he didn't move, like he didn't dare…

"You promised to not die, didn't you? So, take it… I trust you to spare me…"

He opened his mouth, but made no sound. He blinked and tried to lift himself a little using his left arm, I held him because he wasn't able to sustain it.

He didn't tell me that it was possible to be bitten and still live, but for some reason I trusted him. His eyes were strange, but being so close let me see how purple they were. I was bearing almost all his weight. He took my arm, his hand very weak holding me, brought my wrist to his lips, slowly licked the hand junction, tongue dancing there. I forgot how to breathe. His eyes were locked on mine. I couldn't close them if I wanted, I was fascinated with him. Then I felt the pain of his teeth puncturing my skin.

I tried to jerk my arm back out of pure reflex, but he was holding tight already. I wasn't sure if I dozed off and lost the moment where our places were exchanged and he was bearing my weight, one of his arms was around my waist keeping me in place. Surprisingly fast, but also, I wasn't sure about the time. Starting in my bitten arm, a heat spread fast over my whole body, turning me on. My head was light, like floating over my shoulders. I didn't really feel when he finished and pulled his teeth back. My arm was kind of numb, but I still felt the strong gripping of his hand almost crushing there to put some pressure and stop the bleeding.

He pulled me closer to his bare chest, his body heat going through my shirt easily, then I noticed how cold I was. I saw worry in his eyes and wanted to tell him I was ok. The words didn't came out my mouth however. But my warm breath touched his lips, very close to mine, I noticed. They were full and smooth, not cracked dry anymore. One blood red line on his chin. I was hit with a strong desire, my whole body screamed "yes" and I couldn't help myself but kiss him.

Even dizzy and lightheaded I never was so aroused before; I didn't think, I couldn't, just acted. I kissed him slowly, my own lips catching his, they were so soft. He didn't move, letting me give him little kisses, enjoying the softness of his lips. I slid my tongue on them, tasting the metallicity of my own blood. Filled by a unusual daring, I pressed my tongue to open his lips hoping to taste more. He opened a little letting me tangle our tongues together. I had a vague feeling that I was being rough, but I was so aroused that it made me anxious, almost desperate. But if I was, he showed no sign, still passively receiving my kiss. Not really returning my passion, just leisurely moving his lips and tongue.

I wanted to hold him, press our bodies together, of course I didn't have the coordination to do that. When my lips left his mouth, tracing the line of his jaw, avoiding some bruises, going down in his neck, he stopped me, pulling me to slide to his chest.

"There, there… rest now…" his voice was low, not hoarse anymore, his lips brushed my ear making me shiver, even as he was patting my head like I was some child that needed to be hushed. I wanted to keep kissing him, wanted to make him kiss me back. But with his arms strongly circling my body, his warmth making me so comfortable, I just dozed of to my dreams in the blink of an eye.

(...)

* * *

 _Diana Lua_

 _Diana C. Figueiredo_

 _Written in: May and June/2016 - Published: Oct/10/2016_

 _Beta Reader: Cylina Nightshade (Oct/2016)_

 _Last change: Oct/10/2016_

* * *

 _ **#** This chapter was too big, so I needed cut it; otherwise would take too long to update it._

 _ **#** Hope the bite scene was nice, it was very hard made it exactly the way I wanted._

 _ **#** Thanks a lot for the support by whom left comments. I started to write in English because the Portuguese GW fandom dead, so nobody comment anymore (there is almost no hits too :/ )_

 ** _Hope things wasn't happening too slow and boring, I will love see your opnions. :)_**


	4. Blood (continuation)

_\- I think this part is kind of fluffy 1 &2 ^_^; Wufei little ass… :/_

 _- **Cylina** is helping me a lot (Thanks is not enough)._

* * *

 **Where my demons hide**

 **03\. Blood** (continuation)

(...)

Some distant shouting woke me up. My eyes were heavy and my body numb; I wanted to just ignore it. With an arm around my waist and something soft and tender covering my back, I was feeling warm and comfortable.

Yes, I really should ignore the shouts. However, there also was a sound, like a snarl, rumbling over my ears.

"You beast, answer me! What you did with him?" Chang's voice was shouting.

There was no answer, yet, again, the snarl, followed by a tightening of the hold around my waist. I made a big effort to open my eyes a little; it was dark in the room and I found myself laying over the demon's body, his good wing covering me. I might be ashamed if I wasn't so dizzy.

The glimpse of torchlight reflecting off the sword was what made me fully awaken. Because that sword was pointed at the demon's neck, very near my own head.

"If you don't answer me I will cut off your head… like Heero should have done."

I tried to move myself, feeling a big weakness in my entire body. The hold became a grip on my waist to support me; the wing moved a little letting more of that yellow firelight come to my vision.

"Put down the sword, Chang…" my voice was surprisingly steady.

"Heero!" he shouted, making a movement toward me. But he stepped back, refusing to fully lower the sword when the demon hissed at him, showing white sharp teeth. That reminded me why I was there, I probably had passed out after the bite.

Before the relief, there was a kind of surprise for me to still be alive. So, I was right and he chose not to drink me dry. I managed to raise my head a little to look at him. He looked a lot better, not trembling or sweating anymore, his body still just warm, not feverish. His eyes had a sharp focus, without wandering, looking straight to whom was threatening him.

I had slept on the left side of his bare chest, my legs straddling one of his, his wing covering all of me. The feeling of the feathers on my back was amazing, gentle and snug. I made no effort to get out of that suggestive position.

"How are you feeling?" I asked and heard a choke, not from him.

"You need rest. Food and rest…" he didn't really answer my question, or looked at me.

"Heero! What the fuck...?"

I wanted to ignore it, but knowing him like I did, he wouldn't let me.

Full of regret, I slowly tried to sit. The demon's arm lost the grip on my waist and grabbed onto my arm to help steady me. We were a little ways from his blood pool, he probably moved us out of the mess, though that did nothing for the dirt on our bodies and clothes.

"You idiot! I knew I shouldn't have gone. Are you hurt?" Chang reached to grab my left wrist to pull me up and I slapped him away with a pained groan. He insisted, taking and turning my wrist to see a big spot of stale blood. "Shit!"

"It's nothing. I'm ok. Only a bit weak."

"You are everything but okay…" He grabbed my shoulder, helping me stand up, since I couldn't do it myself. The demon watched in complete silence; he folded his wing taking it out of our way. I immediately missed the warmth of his skin and the feathers' texture. I didn't really want to leave his side.

"You are a mess…" Wufei took my weight on his shoulder, supporting me by my right arm. He was looking all over me, checking for others injuries.

Chang was pushing me through the bedroom, toward the door, but I couldn't go. There was a longing to stay with the demon. I stopped walking and reached to get a hold of the bed's footboard, letting my body fall on the mattress.

"What now, Yuy?" Chang asked, upset and impatient.

"I will sleep here…" I knew that was not enough to satisfy him, so I added, "... don't think I can walk all the way back to my own room."

"I will find someone to help me carry you."

"No! I'm ok. Just a couple hours to dawn, I will be fine here. You go rest too."

"Yuy, what did it do to you? You are not coherent."

"He did nothing. I offered my blood, that was all…" I probably should've stayed quiet, he looked at me, wide black eyes and mouth open. I knew he was very angry by the frown between his eyebrows. It took some time for him to find his voice.

"When did IT become HE?"

"Enough already." I laid down, trying to find some comfortable position, wanting to sleep right away. "You find the healer?"

"Yes…"

"So we will talk after breakfast. Lock the door when you leave."

I heard him curse in Chinese before he stepped away slamming the door. I was sure he would bother me more later. For now, I just wished he had never come. I would have rather stayed where I was before, but there was no excuse to be back there.

(...)

When I woke again, I was feeling like I had been trampled by a horse. I slept on my arm that was now completely numb. My whole body was a bit strange, my head was pounding hard when the daylight reached my eyes.

I rolled over to find the demon's head leaning on the mattress edge. He was sitting on the floor, that same way as before: keeping his weight off the right side. Which showed me he wasn't yet healed from the fractures. But he looked a lot better, with eyes closed and face relaxed.

For a moment I turned my sight to my wrist, seeing two holes perfectly rounded, precise and clean. The surrounding skin was a little dark, bruised. I immediately remembered how aroused I felt, the hunger and need. Even in my strange dreams I imagined that was the way people felt when demons drank their life. Maybe it was a bizarre last gift, the pleasure of death.

"It's so the blood don't clot…"

That startled me and I found the demon's eyes open, looking at me. Maybe it was a coincidence, he saw me looking at the bite mark, but it was strange that he answered just what I was thinking. Made me wonder, again, if he was capable of reading minds.

"... while we drink. It makes humans feel… hot."

Hot wasn't the right word, what I felt, was more than just hot. The softness of his lips floating in my memory. I wanted to ask if he didn't kiss me back because he didn't want to or because my kiss was just a reflex of his biting. Should I say sorry for the kiss? Reflex or not, I certainly wasn't sorry about it.

"Thanks…" was all I said. For letting me live. For trusting me. For… letting me kiss you. "How are you feeling now?"

He looked away, instinctively shifting uncomfortably.

"Why are you still so wounded?" Clearly the fractures and other injuries weren't healed.

"I took barely enough to get rid of the poison…" he said and looked back at me with a smirk, showing his tongue tip. "You humans are very fragile."

I didn't take it personally. It's true if you compare us with him. Angels or high level demons could kill tons of humans easily.

"Thanks…" I repeated.

He looked quite surprised, losing the playful mask and blinking at me. It was very hard to understand what he's thinking. He lowered his eyes, twisting his own fingers anxiously.

"Duo."

The whisper was so low, that I wasn't sure what it was or if I heard right. "Duo… ?"

He looked at me, and I could tell he was a little embarrassed. And this made me figure out that he had said was his name. I couldn't not smile at him. Finally I had a way to address him, yet... "It's not your true name."

"It's the only name that means something to me."

Maybe it wasn't his birth name, but I was satisfied already. This little piece of information made me want to know more about him. What could have happened to him that he didn't even keep his angel name, his birth name.

Suddenly he straightened his body uncomfortably, surely he would stand up if it was possible. "What do you want from me?" his voice was rough, a little hurt.

"I want help…"

"No help comes without a price…" He said with a frown, looking straight at me, like he was trying to read something. I've never heard about any creature that could read other's thoughts, but the sensation that that was what he was doing was very strong.

"I… I don't know..." I muttered. I didn't know what I did wrong, but I didn't like his change of mood; he was relaxed and calm minutes ago.

"You should know. I thought you were stalling to discover a way to kill me… but..."

His intense purple-blue eyes stared straight into me. I took the chance to assure him. "The moment I set eyes on you, it no longer entered my thoughts." Truth. I couldn't lie to eyes like that. I hadn't any reason to anyway.

"Why not? You are a demon hunter, aren't you?"

"I… yes I am. I need to keep my people safe."

"So… why not kill me? Why take care of me? Why give your life essence to aid me? Why do you… care?" the last sentence came as a whisper. I confess I was more interested in his face, once he laid his head again on the mattress. His straight face with those demanding exotic eyes trying to see through me. Besides, I'm not sure about the answers to those questions. I just felt… bound to him since I saw the first brightening of his eyes.

"Because I…" I tried, wishing he could read my mind in that moment, yet, maybe my thoughts were too messy to be read "... thought you are a fallen angel…"

He looked like he didn't believe it at all, a sarcastic smile on his lips accompanied by a brightening in his eyes.

"I'm a demon. But, if I was… that thing, that only makes me a stronger demon, dangerous and harder to kill. The fallen ones became demons too. And I'm sure you know the angels are selfish bastards. You aren't some of the fools that believe they are… good. So, what changes if I was?"

I had no answer. Of course I knew the cold, distant and selfish nature of angels. If I didn't think he was a fallen angel, would that change something about the way I felt?

Our heads were very near lying on the white sheets. I looked to his pale, smooth skin, the salient cheeks, the snub nose, those perfect lips and of course, those big round and bright eyes. He was unimaginably strong and yet, had a slender, subtle body. It was for his divine beauty, that I thought he should be an angel, but it didn't matter what he was, I would feel the same.

It was just a brush of lips, when I moved my head toward the space between us. He didn't shove off, but made no move to encourage me. He didn't look surprised, his eyes lost that mischievous brightness and stilled, just trying reading me.

"That makes you a drop dead gorgeous demon too…"

His eyes became wide, surprised and quite incredulous. "So is 'that' what you want from me? Looks like too much trouble for just a fuck…"

Then I was the one who was surprised. I hadn't thought so far… well, maybe I had, but just because of that thing with his bite. "No…" I back off and tried to sit, maybe too fast. I was weaker than I realized and needed to hold on to the sheets to catch my balance. "It's not about 'that'..." I faced him, feeling the dizziness, and when I met his eyes, he was a bit angry.

"If you say so… but what in the hell made you think I would let you fuck me?"

Those crude words shocked me. Of course I felt attracted to him, who wouldn't? But that wasn't the reason I wanted to help him. At least, not all of it. Behind his scrutinizing gaze I wished he could really read my thoughts, because I had no words to answer that.

"Why don't you fear me? All others feared…" the anger fading a bit in his eyes.

"Besides what you are, your actions… never gave me a reason to think you would harm me. Should I fear you?"

He looked toward the window again, his face gained a dark expression. "I won't… harm you. But you truly should fear… being near me."

His voice was grievous, bangs covering his eyes. He didn't leave room for me say anything. He closed that tiny gap that I thought I was opening.

"You might go eat and rest…"

"Yes … I should…" For sure I was hungry, still...

"I will be alright…" he cut my thoughts sharply.

"Is there something that I can do for you?"

Duo looked back at me, deeply, with clouded eyes just for an instant, then he looked to the window, letting his head lay back on the mattress again. "Is there?"

"You're still too wounded… let me… Chang found a famous healer… maybe he can help."

He didn't look back at me, just laid there facing the sky through the window.

"Then, you will let me go?"

I held my breath. He wants to go away? But he was still in pain, wounded, with broken bones. I couldn't let him go. Not yet. I climbed out of the bed, going toward the door like someone drunk. I grab the knob, looking back to his figure stopped there. Before I closed the door behind me, I said, "I will send someone to clean the bathroom and bring hot water. A bath will make you feel better."

" _Don't want to let you down"_

 _(TBC…)_

* * *

 _Diana Lua_

 _Diana C. Figueiredo_

 _Written: May and Jun/2016 - Published: Nov/01/2016_

 _Beta Reader: Cylina Nightshade (Oct/2016)_

 _Last change: Nov/01/2016_

* * *

 ** _#_** _Thanks for the reviews, I loved them! They really cheer me up to continue and finish quickly._

 ** _Heero was cute here, was not? Hope not too OOC... :)_**


	5. Trust

_\- I want to thank Cylina for all help with the English (and is a lot of it). **  
**_

 _\- Sorry for the long delay... I was really stuck in here, hope this was not an annoying chapter. I'm not sure what I didn't like in it._

* * *

 **Where my demons hide**

 **04**. **Trust**

" _No matter what we breed_

 _We still are made of greed"_

"Shit!" There was no other thing to say when the green eyes of Trowa found his lord walking slowly, holding a hand on the wall to catch his balance. He was wearing the same clothes from the day before, just dirtier; the marks on his neck were darker and he had blood, red blood, staining the right sleeve of his shirt. Trowa rushed toward him, helping him to walk and climb the stairs to his room.

The tall one was a much more observant man than a talker; he asked for warm water and some food from the servants before stopping to look at his lord and friend.

"Thanks," Heero simply said, seated tired on his bed.

"Good that it was me and not Chang that found you in these conditions."

The lord rubbed his eyes thinking of the argument before. "Well, I don't think I will be able to get him off my case about it anyway."

Trowa agreed, remembering how he saw the chinese coming out the demon's room last night, cursing and wanting to beat down everything on the way. But, for now, that wasn't the most important thing.

He didn't need to ask. He knew exactly what Heero was feeling about the creature. He saw the beauty and the loneliness in the demon's eyes and he saw the way Heero's eyes shined in the darkness of the dungeon, the thickness of his voice asking for a tranquilizer, the care he had with it when he could get near to treat its wounds. Besides, they grew up together and knew each other very well.

"Heero…"

"I'm ok," he snapped back. "Just need to clean myself and rest for a few hours…"

Trowa bit his tongue. It wasn't his business and he normally wouldn't intrude in it. But that wasn't a normal situation and they've been friends for too long, so he spoke cautiously but plainly. "Just be careful. We don't know nothing about it or what it could do..."

Heero snorted irritated. "He won't do anything."

Trowa stepped forward and caught his arm, shoving the stained dirty sleeve. He saw the bite mark understanding exactly what it meant. "I assume that it's not dying anymore, but this was very… reckless."

Heero pulled his arm back. His hand covering the wounded wrist, unconsciously rubbing it. "I know. I… know, but nothing bad happened."

"Are you sure it is trustworthy?"

The lord couldn't find words or strength to look for a whole explanation, besides even he himself didn't fully understand those… feelings. "He told me his name, and said he won't harm me."

"And you are... taking a demon's word?"

And there was Trowa to remind him again about his own faults. He was just too tired to argue or even think.

Some servant knocking broke the conversation and Trowa preferred letting it rest, at least for now. He opened the door letting the servants come in, food and rest were the main priorities.

"Trowa… send someone to clean his bathroom. It would be nice if you could go with... It's... a big mess and I don't want to scare the servants…" Heero said sheepishly.

"All right," he said leaving, no less concerned.

When he climbed down the stairs, he wondered if it would be better to first see the 'big mess' before bringing anyone in there. He was very conscious about how fast and far the rumors were spreading. There was probably at least something on everyone's tongue; it wasn't exactly a secret that they brought a demon into the castle.

And he was right.

Trowa cursed once he opened the door, seeing all that black blood on the floor, dirty rags spread all over, some black feathers, scratches on the bathwood, rocks cracked on the wall. It looked like there had been a battle against a whole group of demons in there, except for the lack of bodies.

He walked to the other door. It was opened already and right away his eyes met the demon's. The creature was sitting on the floor leaning against the bed. His face was cold, eyes locked on him.

Duo had heard the steps long before even though it was a very silent way to walk. He was alert, but didn't move. Partly because it would be painful, partly because he didn't feel any bad intention. When Trowa appeared in his sight he recognized the man from the dungeon; he had been beside the lord there.

They watched each other in deep silence, each one trying to read different things.

For Trowa, the demon didn't appear much better than when he was in the dungeon, but he didn't see him 'dying' like Heero had said.

For Duo, behind the strong and muscular frame he felt curiosity and concern. But with a cautious look he could feel something more, something that wasn't exactly feelings. Could be some seal, or some spell, but something surrounded him, very subtle, that probably would pass unnoticed. He never had seen something like it before.

"What do you want here?"

"I want?" The purple eyes strengthened dangerously. "You are the ones that dragged me here…"

"But you didn't leave…"

"I would have, if it was possible." His eyes flew to the narrow windows for a second. "And I will very soon…" he said like he meant it. For some strange reason Trowa was very inclined to accept his word. He was feeling somewhat trusting on it. Wondered if Heero felt the same way, that could explain a lot of his behavior.

Duo was still intrigued about that... aura. "You are human." It was a statement, not a question, and Trowa looked puzzled, not understanding what could possibly make the demon doubt this.

"What?"

Duo wondered if he knew about that... thing, because he felt the other truly muddled and oblivious.

"What did you come for?"

Trowa didn't answer immediately, still figuring out that comment.  
"For this..." he glanced over his shoulder to the black blood spread all around, "... mess." He sigh, annoyed, knowing he would need to do something about it before calling the servants. His critical eyes turned to the creature remembering the wounds he had seen on his friend. "Heero told me that you said you won't harm him."

The demon frowned. "Yes, I said that. And that was a one time offer valid just for him," he growled in obvious frustration; it was a bitch to admit it.

Trowa nodded, fully understanding the concealed threat in it. With a last look in those eyes, vacillating about the baseless belief in that creature, he left the door threshold, going back into the bathroom and closing the door behind him.

(...)

The sunlight woke Quatre in that morning. He slowly opened his eyes; he hadn't slept well at all, too tired from the exhausting trip. He had a calm and peaceful nature, preferring to do things slowly, paying attention to everything around him. He was a wanderer, with no place to call home, just going with the flow of life, hoping to find and follow the signs that might lead him to the only thing that really matters.

And for a while, a long while, he had been having only lack of luck in his quest.

So, when the chinese man appeared in his camp, saying that his lord was needing a skillful healer, someone who could deal with some unusual situation, he hadn't reason at all to refuse. Moreover, he'd been told that he would be payed for _and_ could stay in the castle for however long he wanted.

He was mainly moved by curiosity and his perception, not by money or comfort. But again, there was no reason to refuse. Who knew what that could turn up for him? Also, just that very man, Chang Wufei, raised his interests. He could tell that the man might be some expert in the field, so why would his lord need yet another healer?

He was quite quick to dismantle his camp and gather his belongings. So they started for the castle a few hours later. But halfway to their destination, they were intercepted by two other men of the same lord. Something was apparently wrong, very wrong, despite the fact that none of them would say what. They had orders to head back right away. The call had become more interesting, so the blond just agreed to rush with them, even though he was a little worried for his buckskin mare[3], not used to a fast lope.

When they arrived, with some lame excuses Chang left him in the servants' care. Quatre saw himself accommodated in a large room, a nice change for someone who normally sleeps on the floor. Even between the hurry and tiredness he had another sensation: some good feeling, a thrill at his nape, a strange comfort. That just raised his hopes.

Before he fell asleep, he heard some commotion, that seemed be across the hall. But when no one came, he didn't bother to find out what it was about.

Then, in the morning, still no one came to call on him, so he didn't wait. That good sensation stayed there and he was very curious to see... everything. Maybe finally he was on the right path, after so long searching blindly.

It was early, but when he climbed down the stairs into what should be the common hall, it was oddly empty; he needed to busy himself with looking for someone.

He didn't need to search long, the emptiness made the sounds echo quite easily, and he followed them. The voices that he heard were coming from large decorated doors, cracked open. He didn't mean to eavesdrop, but that thrill on his nape became strong, making him shiver and he froze due to the fierceness of his own emotions.

The conversation wasn't loud, but the obvious annoyance surrounding it meant they couldn't keep it low.

"I saw him early. He was in bad shape, but not…"

"Well," impatient, Chang interrupted, "I saw him at night and my first thought was that he was dead! Pale, all sprawled over the beast in the middle of that mess of blood." He shivered with the memory. "What was Heero thinking? He said he let it drink his blood..."

"The poisoning scared the hell out of him. He really thought the demon was dying."

Chang threw a dry look. "It's that I can't understand. This... worry."

"You really don't, Chang?"

Wufei shut up beneath the intense green gaze. Swallowed hard, rubbing his face; he was so tired, overwhelmed by the idea to prevent what was happening in some way. How could Heero develop feelings for a demon? He who had lost so much because of them. The whole situation brought him memories that he would rather be kept out of his mind, leaving him with an, almost forgotten, aching in his chest.

"Doesn't it bother you?" He knew that Trowa had lost a lot too.

Trowa shook his head. "Maybe. I... kind of..." There was no way to explain that trustworthy feeling, apparently the chinese man wasn't affected by it. "You saw that it's appearance wasn't even close to the demons we are used to. I don't believe that Heero was in danger."

The black eyes widened. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. What the hell? "The appearance didn't matter to me. That creature doesn't belong to our world. Doesn't matter if angel or demon, heaven or hell, we shouldn't..."

The chinese man looked away, lost in thought, unconsciously rubbing the length of his left arm. He knew it was already too late. Even if he _was_ the skeptical type, he knew what it meant to fall in love at first sight; he also knew that this kind of love didn't always strike instantly, especially for another species. Maybe Heero was physically safe, but his heart will be broken as certain as the sun rises every morning. His hand slid to his aching chest, feeling some pressure, a squeeze there. For an instant he doubted if he was worried about his friend's feelings or for his own. He had made strong efforts to lock them deep and push them aside to forget.

He was just too tired, not wanting to deal with any more. Ignoring Trowa, he pushed the door wide open to get out, being surprised by the small blond man standing there.

Wufei had totally forgotten about him. Trying to gather himself to be, at least, polite, "Oh, Sir Winner, I'm sorry… was a busy night and morning." But then, noticing the somewhat pale look on the other's face, he wondered how much he might have heard. Anyway, those aquamarine eyes were telling that he didn't care at all; they were embedded on Trowa, behind him.

"This is Trowa Barton," the chinese man introduced them. Just a bit suspicious about that look, but fully intending to leave him in Trowa's care. He just needed to put his mind, his heart, at ease right now; maybe some meditation would help.

Quatre repeated the name, as a whisper under his breath, when he stepped ahead stretching his hand.

Trowa found that brightening look strange, like it was full of… need. Though he took the hand to shake politely. "Nice..." The words died in his mouth, caught by surprise by the sudden feeling of… home? It was a shock, an electricity passing through his whole body. He shivered, widening his eyes. "... to meet you… Sir Winner."

A little smile blossomed on the blond's thin lips. "Please, call me Quatre…" He pressed a little hard with the handshake, holding a bit more than usual.

Trowa didn't know what was happening; when their hands separated he felt a need to grab it again. "Have we... met before?"

"No..." Quatre said with sheepishly smile and a very tender expression. "I've never met Trowa Barton." And that wasn't a lie.

The awkward moment was broken by the sudden commotion, calling their attention, out to the library.

"Heero, you look like shit!" Chang's voice called out as he lead the other inside the library. Heero sat on the couch and the chinese man leaned against the massive table, crossing his arms in front his chest, his expression cold and concerned. The lord, avoiding looking at him, let his eyes flow curiously from Trowa to the other small man in there.

"I'm Quatre Winner, at your service, my Lord." The healer rush to introduce himself, happy to break the heavy atmosphere. He noticed the man was pale and shaky, some bruises appearing on his neck, besides the high collar of his shirt.

"Heero Yuy." The large sleeve slid a bit when he extended his hand, showing Quatre bite marks on his bruised wrist.

The blond turned it a bit to take a better look. "Demon's bite," he muttered. Quatre made himself comfortable sitting beside Heero on the couch, pushing his shirt's collar aside to see the purple stains, fingers shaped, on his skin.

Even though he hadn't had his attention in the words he eavesdropped on before, he had processed that they were talking about some sort of demon. And it didn't take much for him to figure out what the 'unusual situation' was about. He just didn't know what they could possible expect him do.

"So… It's about this you bring me here, my lord?" he asked softly, reaching for a small bag attached to his belt.

Heero nodded looking at Trowa as he pushed one chair near, taking his hand to start bandaging it. Then Quatre stopped him, his fingers lingering on the tall man's hand, making him shiver and turn his gaze to the blond finding some sweetness in the blue eyes.

"Allow me..." he said, holding a little bottle. Even though the glass was dark brown, whatever liquid was inside still shown with a blue light. He dropped just one drop in each fang hole.

All three looked, astonished; the wound consuming the transparent liquid that really glowed blue and healing completely.

He took Heero's hand dropping a little more on his palm, and led him to brush in his own neck and wrist, making the bruises disappear. Ignoring the surprised looks, he gently asked, "Then tell me about… it."

It took a moment for Heero to organize his thoughts, for some reason he felt free to tell all to the man that he just met. Maybe it was because that small frame, the innocent face, the gentle eyes.

Chang made some sarcastic and irritated comments now and again. But, when Heero couldn't find the words to say why he thought that should be a fallen angel, was Wufei who finished with, "Astonishingly handsome… " in obvious exasperation.

"Oh…" the blond chuckled, a bit puzzled. "You know, high level demons can be… beautiful too in some way."

"No. Not that dark mix of beauty and horror. He is just… almost ethereal, like I imagine an angel should be."

The blond sensed the protectiveness, the care, that the lord housed about the creature. And wondered cautiously how... to explain things.

"I'll take that you know little about fallen angels."

"Not more than that they can't be killed and they were expelled from heaven for having sinned," Trowa said.

"That is kind of true, at least part of it. Fallen angels are the ones that were heaven's outcasted by God himself, when they chose Lucifer's side in the rebellion. They taught some things to the human kind, just to dare God. They were few, but were the very first ones, most archangels, so they were stronger than any other. There didn't exist someone able beat them, or even match them; that's why they can't be killed."[4]

Quatre made a small pause, sensing the strong suspicion coming from the chinese man, while the other two appeared to just be absorbing the information.

"So, I'm pretty sure that what you have here can't be one of them. There's no way they could be beat like you said. Fallen angels still in the angelical form, they can't bite and drink blood like this."

"What the hell... So, just a Shinigami?"

"Why not?"

"I don't know… it's just…" Heero rubbed his eyes confused.

"You know, my lord, Shinigamis weren't exactly demons. They have a lot of physical similarities, but they were servants of Death. You told me that he had the symbols and a divine scythe[5]. Shouldn't be any doubts…"

Heero shrugged, tired.

"That's ok, my lord," Quatre said, his hand coming rest on the lord's shoulder, noticing the frustration coming from him. "There any more injuries that I can heal for you?"

"Just his..."

"What?"

"He brings you here to heal the demon, not him," Chang said coldly.

Quatre stood, mouth agape. He guessed it something strange, but not that strange. "I thought... you wanted me here to heal… you, once... well, I understand that you wanted to keep this creature…"

"No… no like this… he isn't my prisoner…" he ignored the snort coming from Wufei, "I just… I want to help him…" Heero didn't want anymore judging looks, the questions about his interest, his care. He wished he could heal Duo enough just with his blood, so he wouldn't need to deal with... the others, with the startled looks like that one the blond was giving to him.

"I'm sorry, I'm not sure if I can do something for… him", Quatre was concerned, starting to understand how extensive the lord's confused feelings were.

"This ointment you just used. It is like nothing I ever saw. It's quite powerful. Maybe…"

"That… will hurt a demon, even a shinigami."

"But…"

"If you want me to look at him, I will. I just... never…" He hardly would be able to do something like that, but he would do what he could to please the lord. He had no intention to leave the castle anymore. "If you want... help", that sounded dubious, "why not return the weapon?"

"I..." Trowa started a little loud, but then correct himself, "We won't take any chances to have... a bigger problem."

"Right, I will see what I can do then."

"Thanks…" Heero simply said, overwhelmed and exhausted.

"For now, you should get some rest… I will ask for something hearty for lunch, so you can gain some strength back." Wufei approached with arms crossed in front his chest, he couldn't get rid of that resentment. He saw Heero take a deep breath and stretch himself out right there on the couch.

They left the library, with a huge awkward silence, broke with some hesitation by Wufei .

"You know a lot about inhumans, and said things with this such confidence... This kind of information isn't easy to obtain... how did you find it?"

For an instant Quatre did not know what to say, a little worried for the chinese perceptiveness. He couldn't say the truth, but also couldn't lie. "Well I wander a lot through the world. Collecting information was one of my… intents."

That didn't lessen Wufei's apprehension and distrust in the little man. His behavior was more than odd; something that he hadn't noticed the day before. But when Quatre turned toward Trowa, asking to lead him to the woods outside to look for some herbs, he just decided that he didn't want to drown himself any more in that mess looking for answers. He just wanted to ease his mind, make it blank, meditate a little.

(...)

Some hours later, Heero came again to the demon's room. He, actually, should have gone back to his own room, to sleep a little more, but that strong want to be near Duo made his feet carry him there.

He found the creature sitting on the long bench near the window, the only other piece of furniture, besides the bed, in the room. He was wearing a clean pair of pants. His long hair was spread across his back, wet, dripping all over. The good wing, half unfolded, letting the black feathers shine beneath the sunlight. The demon had a long look, faced staring away through the windows, lost in thoughts, wind blowing on his bare chest without notice the cold of winter.

The brown hair shining in gold strands; all of him seemed to glow with the sun, surreally beautiful, making the lord's heart skip a beat. Even the dirty bandages didn't break the magic of the picture.

With a unreadable gaze the demon turned to him, even though he hadn't made any noise or move. "Better?"

Heero nodded, walking toward him, awed for the sight. He stopped in front of him a bit uncertain, his hand reaching to brush a lock of long hair behind his ear. His fingers sliding over the brown silk until the shoulder.

That honey gold color making his heart ache with bitter memories. It was the warmth of his skin that woke him. The lord didn't know why he wasn't shoved off, so he let his hand rest over the demon's shoulder. His eyes evading the purple ones, finding in the dirty bandages something to talk about.

"We should change the bandages…"

Duo's eyes stared a moment at the hand on his shoulder, wondering why he let the man come near him so easily. He eyed his broken wing, biting his lower lip, really not wanting to jostle it.

"The leg at least…"

He turned his eyes to met the man's, studying him. "Why bother?"

"I want you feel better..." And that sounded vague even to his ears, so he amended, "The healer agreed to see you... if you'll allow..."

"Why? Do you think he can do something?"

"I'm not sure. But, at least he is willing to give it a try… so, if he can, that will be another way, beside my blood, to heal you..."

The demon frowned a little, wondering why any human, healer or not, would be willing try to heal a demon. He knew better. That surviving was only possible if you don't hand your trust blindly to others.

There was enough going on with that blue eyed human. He knew, deeply, the reason for it. But others? Duo knew he shouldn't.

Even though, if the lord really wanted so much to help and heal him, he had one easy way. "You know... the easiest way to heal me... if you want to..."

Their eyes found each other for a moment, feelings twisting around.

Heero let his fingers linger over the slender, strong arm, tracing the subtle line of the biceps, a little damp because the wet hair. He tried not to think about the found scythe; he didn't know what to do, what to say, and, truth be told, he didn't want to think about.

He went to fetch a dry towel.

"Can I?" was the question when he came back stopping behind the demon, holding the towel with both hands to indicate it was about the wet hair.

Duo tilted his head with a suspicious gaze to find the lord's blue eyes. He felt the nostalgia in that simple action. So he just shrugged, turning his face to the window again, just one more in a list of the intimacies that he shouldn't allow.

Heero smiled and started rubbing the towel through the hair. The trust that Duo had in him, if he could call it that, was his only coin of exchange. If there was some way to make him allow Quatre to see him, because Heero had seen the peaceful nature of the blond. He really was hoping that something could be done.

The silence between them was intimate and comforting, broken just by the rustle of the towel. Heero didn't know where this came from. Maybe it was the blood, maybe the kiss, he wouldn't risk asking.

When he thought it was dry enough he tossed the towel and started brushing gently with his fingers. Duo let his head fall back slightly, expressly enjoying, and Heero let his fingers slide on his scalp, on the back of his neck, stroking, massaging firmly.

"I had a young sister…"

He said when the demon lifted his head, returning to loosening the knots, brushing the whole length.

"She had long chestnut hair that brightened to gold with the sunlight, just like yours." He stayed quiet until the long hair was loose enough in his hands, smooth and shining. The demon stayed immobile, having his own bitter nostalgic memories with that sweet touch.

"Sometimes she'd come to ask me to tie her hair and I always just shoved her away. She was much younger than me; I was at that age... trying prove I was a man instead of a boy. The last thing on my mind was how I lost my precious time helping her with her hair."

Duo just waited for the other to swallow that sour guilt, feeling a rhythmic movement on his hair.

"When I noticed that was just a way to show affection, it was too late. The one time I did her hair, I had no idea the way she liked it, so I buried her with her beautiful hair braided."

The purple eyes widened for a moment at the sadness. A thick braid was put over his shoulder with the tip loose, his hand reached for it, aware of Heero turning around to stand in front of him. He could feel the grief.

"I'm sorry…" he said looking at the braid and not at the other. At that moment he didn't know if the pain, the regret, hovering in the air was his or the lord's, maybe both.

"Not as much as I am…" He reached for the braid, actually touching the demon's hand over it. "Her death was my fault. I made a wrong decision, didn't follow my feelings trying to prove something that I even know now..."

Duo looked straight at him, his violet eyes lightened by sun, letting the lord hold his hand "Demons attacked the castle and I wasn't here to protect it. I lost her and all my family that day. My fault cost a lot to others too, like Trowa…" his thumb making circular drawings on the back of his hand "For now, the only healing I can offer you shouldn't endanger any other but myself…"

If the demon truly was able to read minds, he should understand this. Their eyes still locked, and Duo turned his hand where it lay, cradling the lord's hand in return, his sharp claws tracing the inner lines of his palm.

"Even you blame yourself. You hate demons. So why do you want heal rather than kill me?"

Duo already knew why, maybe better than the lord himself. Still...

Heero didn't answer and Duo sighed, giving in. "Probably will be useless… but bring the healer here."

"Thanks for trusting me…" a tiny smile almost showing on Heero's lips.

"You, again, jumping to conclusions. What makes you think I trust you?"

Somewhere inside Duo an alarm sounded. He felt the need to set things straight. His defenses weren't down at all. "You are the only one that I said I wouldn't harm, but that means nothing if I feel some... hostility. Don't forget how fragile you, humans, are." He squeezed Heero's hand to emphasize his words, without really hurting him. "Anyway, it's your own castle, so you can do whatever you want. Just be aware of the... consequences."

Surprisingly, instead of being afraid, the look on the lord's face softened and he stepped closer, bringing the strong dangerous hand up, placing a kiss in the middle of his palm, a promise kiss.

"I assure you, that hostility against you never even entered, nor will ever enter, my thoughts, Duo." With a shy smile he walked to the door, leaving a puzzled demon behind.

" _Though this is all for you..."_

 _(TBC…)_

* * *

 _Diana Lua_

 _Diana C. Figueiredo_

 _Written in: May e Oct/2016 - Published: Jan/18/2017_

 _Beta reader: Cylina Nightshade (Jan/2017)_

 _Last Change: Jan/31/2017_

* * *

 ** _Notes:_**

 _[3] I don't know why I made Sandrock a mare, I thought it just fit well. Buckskin is the color, kind of a cream-colored body with black hooves, tail and mane._

 _[4] I did some research about fallen angels and found a lot of sources and versions. So I kind of goal oriented made this up. I have no intention to follow some specific line about it, and it won't interfere or matter to the plot at all. Hope no one feels… offended if something wasn't quite right._

 _[5] That too hadn't any real base, maybe some concept of Death in Supernatural, but I just made it up. So here Shinigamis had the same characteristics as demons (like bodies that burn with holy water, and fangs to drink blood), but they weren't demons. That means if they lost the bond with his divine weapon he can't heal, on the other hand, demons (also angels) rely on their inner essence to heal._

* * *

 _# I'm sorry, this wasn't supposed to finish here, but I needed to once again split the chapter, because it became too big again. Also, splitting it here seemed a good idea to keep some mystery about Quatre's appearance… I'm a little afraid that the 4 &3 part is developing too fast and, maybe, calling more attention that it should._

 _# I'm also sorry for the long delay. I'm not really happy with the result of this chapter. I stayed stuck on it for a while, but couldn't fix it… so I just give as-is, a transition/explanation chapter that I can work in the upcoming story. Maybe know what you are thinking about the history can help with whatever was bugging me (not sure what it is)._

 _ **So, how is it now with a little bit more of background? :)  
**_


	6. Wingless

**Warning:** That one contain some language and some 4x3 'action' :)

* * *

 **Where my demons hide**

 **05\. Wingless**

" _This is my kingdom come_

 _This is my kingdom come"_

It didn't take long for Heero to come back to demon's room. Duo, still perched in the bench, his eyes flew wide with the door opening. They looked to each other for a second and Duo nodded, reassuring his agreement about the visitor.

The lord smiled and entered, making room for Trowa, that insisted on coming together, followed by Quatre. He closed the door and spun, ready for made the introductions, but it felt like running against a wall of tension. Not that he was expecting some warm reception, but the intensity of that uncomfortable feeling was in a high degree of alarm. Confused, he exchanged a look with Trowa, that was also aware of it. Both didn't miss the surprised look transforming into something else. Deep dark anger in Duo's case and an unreadable cold stone expression took place of Quatre's amiably tender face. A chill ran down his spine, wondering if he had made a wrong decision.

Realizing now, he barely knew the blond man. What caused his mind to decide to bring him here? It was a strange thought to felt that level of trusting for... no reason at all. Where did that suddenly blind trust come from? Was it just because his small frame and gentle manners?

These doubts flew directly to the demon's senses, making his anger increase immediately. "What. The. Hell?" The words came out dead cold, slowly one at time, like he was trying to chew and bit his exasperation inside. Heero gasped, getting lost in the middle of his own newfound doubts and the obvious wrath in the purple eyes.

They all froze still for a heartbeat. The humans trying to understand what the problem was and failing. "Answer me!" Duo barked, raising up forgetting about his weak broken leg. His glare fixed on the blond one, yet the question was for the lord.

Trowa made sure that he was between the demon and Quatre, not that he could do anything if things became... difficult. He couldn't help but be worried about the small blond healer. Not that the demon had been kind with him before, but also it hadn't show such aggressiveness.

"He is the healer. I thought..." Heero tried to explain even without understand what.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Duo jerk himself to hold on to the wall, clawing hard enough to crack the rocks there, trying to keep his balance standing up, refusing a break for the sharp pain on his leg.

"Quatre... his name is Quatre, I..." Heero couldn't process what was going on, and just tried to reach the demon, maybe he could ensure that...

"Don't bullshit me," he said, for a minute turning to face the lord, his face showing all the deception and betrayal that he was feeling. Heero flinched, retracting his hand. Duo turned back to the blond "What the hell is your interest in me, you motherless bastard?"

"I have none," the answer was straight, sharp, a bit haughty, "I was just asked to look at some demon wounds..."

"Fuck you! You agreed with that... knowing that there was nothing you could done for ... What is your interest in me?" Furious was too small a word for the way the demon was in that moment. If he could move he would have already decked that small blond piece of shit. But then, if he could move, he wouldn't be in this situation anyway.

"I told you: I. Have. None." The blond was wicked pissed for other reasons. He knew where this conversation would lead, and he wasn't happy about it. He had agreed with it thinking about some sort of regular demon, not this... But now there wasn't a way to turn back. "I came to help a lord, a human lord that was in need of a healer. I didn't know a thing about demon stuff in the first place. And, for sure, if I had any clue about... well, you, I wouldn't have."

"Bullshit!" Duo snapped and repeated in anger. "Bullshit, you liar!"

"Like I could lie, asshole!" Quatre growled, implicitly saying a bit more that he wanted.

They all shut up. The room suddenly too big, the tension, however, hadn't dimmed down. Duo made a big effort to calm down. Yeah, maybe he knew that the other wasn't able to lie, but he damn well knew how he should master the art to distort the true. The obvious way he was hiding, trying to pass by as human, was just one proof of that.

"So…" he turned to Heero, unable to hide the hurt in his eyes, "What were _you_ expecting bringing this trash here?"

"What? No…" Heero still didn't understand what was happening. Did they know each other? How could it be? "Tell me what the problem is, please…" He was near enough, and one hand of the demon grabbed his arm pulling him even nearer.

Duo supported himself, his anger surpassing the pain to stand. His other hand left the wall pulling on Heero's shirt collar, to see the neck without the bruises and cuts that his claws had done the day before. "Liar! You will tell me that you didn't know?" he accused shoving the sleeve up, finding the wrist's holes healed, just two rounded white scars remained. He didn't give time for Heero say anything; he didn't want to hear any excuses. "He healed those for you, didn't he?"

"Yes…" he said very carefully, choosing the right words to not irritate the demon even more. "It was him. I never saw anything like that before… but I heard he is powerful... it was for that I…"

Duo laughed out loud sarcastically. "You can't be that naive to think that a simple human can do that level of healing!"

"He used a fluid, it was in a bottle! It isn't like he had use his hands or some kind of power. I can't understand what you..." Heero tried to gather some more information, but the demon just finally lost his temper and grabbed the lord's neck "Fuck that! What the hell you want from me anyway?"

Trowa jumped with the strong reaction, his hand looking for his knife more from instinct than to think that he could do something if it was needed. Better believe in the demon's previous promise to not hurt his lord.

"I just... wanted to help..." Heero stuttered the words fighting to get some air. He held the demon's arm with both of his hands trying for some release on the grip. There were hate and disbelief inside those purple eyes and he had no clue about was happening, or what to do to get the situation some control back.

Duo pulled him near, making him stumble in his direction without releasing his grip, intently staring, searching for something.

"You know he isn't lying…" Quatre's detached voice said. Even a bit irritated, he did not flinch once because of the demon's exacerbated reactions. He knew that maybe the man wasn't being true enough about his intentions, but if there was any lie, it was a first for himself, once he yet didn't admit what he was feeling, and it was very clear to the demon and also to Quatre.

"Duo..." Heero whispered the name as quietly as he could, afraid that the others could hear. However, he was counting on that intimacy to calm him down. "Please... what's this about?"

Duo felt the strong confusion, just then, he noticed the spell on the blond, knowing that neither of the fool humans could have known what he truly was.

"Fool, he is a fucking angel… he will help no one besides himself."

Then he released the lord. The smell of blood, the result of his claws scratching the man's neck again, upsetting him most. The man probably truly didn't know, and he had let himself be caught up by personal hate.

Heero stumbled back seeking for air desperately, his throat on fire. He fought to not fall on his own knees. "Believe me… just wanted to help…" his voice came ragged, almost not loud enough for the demon hearing it.

"Is this true?" It was Trowa who broke the silence. Quatre's eyes smoothed when he looked to him, abandoning that stolid expression that he had assumed since he had seen Duo. He just nodded.

"How come…?"

"Wings?" he groaned incapable of running away from that. He didn't expect to answer these questions so soon. However, he also didn't expect to find this kind of mixed creature; he was not even able to feel the presence. "Lost. Long ago..." He adjusted his long coat, and positioned himself against the sunlight coming from the windows, his shadow showing the form of two big wings slowly unfolding.

Heero's blue eyes were wide open. He couldn't believe. What were the odds? His brain vaguely registering the form of the wings completely unfolded. They seemed to be structured as same as common birds, pointing almost straight up with feathers tips rounded. Not as long and sharp as Duo's feathers that were much longer on the edges.

"Why...?" Trowa was more drawn to understand it because he felt such strange feelings for that one. He felt like there was something bonding them, but how could it be, something between him and an angel, a wingless angel?

"I just came following the flux…" Quatre shrugged. "I didn't expect find you, though I hoped. I was always hoping..." Trowa open his mouth completely overwhelmed, but the angel turned to the demon, eyes becoming cold again "This... I didn't expect to find."

"Fuck you!" Duo barked, withdrawing a bit to the wall, really feeling the pain. "So what? You will tell me that you have some relation with this man, how convenient… maybe something about this thing around him…"

"What?" Quatre was truly surprised. "You can see it…?"

Duo straightened his eyes. "Obviously I can…"

"Not that obvious…" the blond snapped back annoyed and puzzled, "Because I can't see myself. I just _know_ it's there." There was a heavy silence. "What _were_ you?"

"Get the hell out of here already, you son-of-a-bitch. If you have no interest in me that's any of your business."

Quatre glared, maintaining his face cold and rigid to turn and get out resolutely, his footsteps resonating loudly through the hallway. Trowa quickly glanced to Heero, but not really waiting for some signal, following the blond right away.

With them, the anger left the room. Heero was only glad that Chang wasn't there. The messy situation could be a lot of worse if he was. He looked to the demon still holding a hand on the wall, trembling in pain.

"Can you calm the hell down now?" Maybe not the best choice of words, he realized right then when the purple eyes looked at him with betrayal written all over. "Duo…" he whispered cautiously, "please, let me help you… your leg is bleeding." His stretched hand was shoved by the demon.

"Tell me Heero, why?"

The lord lowered his eyes, incapable of staring at those beautiful eyes with their slight weariness and pain. He wanted to help, wanted to make him feel better, he wanted...

"I should go…" the demon blurted suddenly.

"Duo please…" What? How he could ask for him stay. "Your leg, let me help you…" he stepped near, casting a glance at that purple depth.

The demon allowed him to reach for his left side to support him. Using the advantage of the proximity he said, with a soft voice, but very serious, "This has already gone way too far… I really need to leave, Heero."

Heero felt completely useless, there was nothing that he could do or say to such a straight face. "Ok… Just… please, let me take care of your wounds, change those bandages... after this, I will find clothes and new armor for you. Please, allow me…"

Their eyes met for an instant, Duo didn't need to look into the blue ones to know what the other was feeling, it was already very clear to all. He should discourage it, he really should. Still, he was damned by his own need, being the object of those sort of feelings. His heart was aching for just bit of caring, of gentleness.

He sat on the bed, accommodating his broken leg under a pillow and making room for the man. Even knowing that once he had his scythe back this wouldn't matter anymore, he let the other aid him, he wanted be cared for.

In silence, Heero brought the medical things from the bathroom and started to cut the dirty bandages off. The wound was considerably clean, looking much better than two days ago when he had wrapped it. No sound or shivering came from demon when he redid the bandaging, wrapping it tightly.

Duo let his fingers find Heero's wrist, holding it loose and caressing the skin, feeling the healed holes there. "In a bottle…" he whispered almost to himself remembering what Heero had said with a little smile. That was a smart idea.

Heero had a small smile, discreetly enjoying the caress. He was also curious, "It shone in a soft blue light. I've never seen something like that. You know what it is?"

Duo looked at him again. With a cocky glint in his eyes, he said very deliberately, "Yes, I know," and stopped at that, daring Heero to insist on the question.

The lord, despite his curiosity, didn't ask, instead, "I'm sorry, if I had any clue… I…"

"I know…" Duo answered calmly. He truly knew it. Letting his gaze float to the window, "There is nothing that he can do for me."

"I'm sorry. I don't know why… I'm not that careless, I just… just… trust him… even though I don't know why."

"It's not your fault…" Duo murmured, his thumb instinctively drawing circles on the other's wrist. "Angels had that kind of power over full blood humans. It's called 'blinding', makes you just trust them and believe in anything they say…"

"I'm sorry," he repeated, chewing on that revelation. Between a lot of other things, he was more and more aware of how little they truly knew about the other beings that exist in the world. He just wanted to continue that talk, even if it was a bit vague. Also, he wouldn't dare move a muscle, while the demon was still holding and caressing his wrist absently. "I didn't think it was possible to hide wings that way…"

"It's not," Duo answered, his eyes were blinking sleepily and he had an amused smile, making Heero wonder about the difference between that restful face and the angery twisted one just a bit before. "No winged being can hide them. Or even the other main physical characteristics, like claws, fangs or horns. That is one of the world's rules to protect you. Humans are easily deceived."

"So, how?"

"Even if he is trying to hide his true identity, using a spell to mask his 'ethereal beauty' and other basic tricks for the other things... he couldn't hide his wings. He really may have lost them, like he said."

"And about the shadows?"

Duo tilted his head and leaned a bit, bracing his body on the mattress. He was really tired, but also finding a funny need to explain such basic things. Well, humans didn't have much of this kind of information anyway, most of their archives were just about the ordinary demons. The rest, angels, dragons and high-level demons, were just like legends for them. "Angel shadows show the true form of their souls. So, even physically wingless, his soul didn't change, he is still the same kind of angel." _[6]_

"You hate all angels…?" In the mix of all that new information, Heero did not know why his next question was just one that could irritate the demon and put an end at the conversation.

Though a sparkle of annoyance did show in his eyes, it quickly disappeared, returning the amusement, for that the lord was grateful. "I'm a demon. Shouldn't this be obvious…?"

"You think he lost his wings to hide from something…?" Heero asked, while trying to hide the blush in his cheeks, caused by Duo's full lips curled in a mischievous smile.

Duo shrugged, "Doubt it… Losing your wings to hide seems to be too much…" he said bluntly, his eyes closing for a longer moment.

The lord took some moment to admire the beautiful face, relaxed with the eyes closed, seriously considering what he wanted asked. The tone in the last answer implicating more behind the words "Duo... are you hiding from somebody?"

The demon didn't open his eyes, but let his body lean all the way on the mattress. Tired and sad, he even tried to avoid the question. "Always…" he whispered "I'm always running and hiding…"

They continued in a comfortable silence. Duo's hand was just resting over the lord's one. Heero didn't know if he was catnapping or lost in inner thoughts. He slowly moved his hand to brush the long bangs away from his eyes. The peaceful moment reminding him that he promised to help gather things for the other's departure; he didn't want to let him go. He lightly touched the other's face, and the demon slightly turned his head to lean in to the touch, the moment of tenderness making Heero want to dare kiss those lips again.

"Duo... we should look at the wing too…" he whispered bracing himself, knowing that he would refuse.

"Too tired..." The answer came muffled when he buried his head against the sheets.

"Sleep then…" Heero said with an affectionate, yet sad, smile. "I will help you with whatever you need, when you awake…" his hand sliding over the soft hair.

Duo's eyelids opened just a little, considering the proposal. Even though he was really tired and his leg was aching quite a lot, he took a moment to try to scrutinize the other's feelings; he had a lot of conflicting feelings inside himself. His eyes opened a bit more when the other's hand moved smoothly to his braid.

"You like it like this?"

Both eyes were on the chestnut entwined locks that were becoming loose since they hadn't been tied.

Duo nodded, taking it from the lord's hands, "Long ago I used to wear it like this for a while…" his voice was as sleepy as it was nostalgic.

"Why did you stop?"

He shrugged, letting go of the braid and closing his eyes again. "Just too much work... this length of hair is a lot of work..."

"So, why keep it so long?"

It took a bit more time for the demon's answer, he was gathering for some comfort to sleep with his injuries. "I just let it be... the way my brother used to like..."

Heero let his body lean side ways, facing the demon's sleeping beautiful face. He wanted to know, to do so many things; mend, help, make the other feel better. He didn't need his commanders to say that he was fascinated for the creature. He saw a small frowning, the fidgeting showing that the other wasn't finding a position comfortable enough. He was caught by surprise, when the strong hand grabbed his shirt, pulling him near.

Duo buried his face on the lord's chest, finally finding a better way to accommodate himself. There was nothing that he could say to explain that… behavior, the truth that he was willing to have some body comfort. He was needy from the warmth, of have someone caring about him. It was probably that the prolonged helpless status was making this needy side come out of the box where it had been buried deep long ago. Duo didn't want to think about it now. The fast beating of the human heart, the fighting to get control over the breathing, amusing him a bit more, he felt sheltered in some way.

He let go, stopped wondering why he was feeling that way. The tentative, almost shy, arm circling him, bringing him near for accommodated his aching leg better, making him want to rest a bit. He just needed to feel that way again, just a little bit... loved. That warm, soft feeling mixed with the disturbing encounter with the angel before, brought to him a dream with very clear blue eyes in a face framed by long clear hair. "Solo" was the almost inaudible whisper that came out his lips when he slid to deep sleep, grabbing and holding tightly to Heero's body.

(...)

Once out of there, Quatre walked quickly crossing the hall toward his own room. He was well aware of the steps hot on his heels. He bit his bottom lip irritated, knowing that he would face a rain of confusing questions, with no way to avoid them. He just would like to have had some more time; never before had he been in a situation when things turned like that so fast.

In a childish moment he wanted to get in his room and close the door, but Trowa's longs legs allowed him to reach the door, holding it open before Quatre could.

"What?" the voice came a little irritated, very different from the gentle tone that the blond had been using with the man before.

Trowa didn't answer, with a hand firmly securing the door partially open, he just stared at the other with his green eyes, making Quatre hesitate, incapable of keeping his anger.

He walked silently inside the room locking the door behind him. He couldn't order his thoughts enough and the two of them just stared at each other for a moment incapable of starting the conversation.

"Ask!"

"Not sure what…"

The blond just blinked, crossing his arms in front of his chest, blocking the confusing feeling coming from the man. He needed to put his mind at ease to be able to lead the conversation the way he wanted, the way he needed.

"Why did you come here?"

The angel rolled his eyes, annoyed. "I didn't have any ulterior motive… I already told you, I didn't know about… that creature, and now I still have no intentions concerning it…"

"Creature..." Trowa mumbled to himself. "It was really pissed to see you... by any chance did you two knew each other?" Quatre rolled his eyes in annoyance and shook his head in a negative. "But you know what it is?"

"Not quite totally. He is a shinigami now… you can say he is a splice, a hybrid being."

"Meaning?"

"He was something else before turning into a shinigami."

"Maybe an angel like you…?"

He snorted, not really in the mood to talk about that other being. Whatever it is or had been, it was really none of his business; changes like that weren't good things no matter how you look at it, better stay as far as possible. Furthermore, the fact of it being able to see the ' _ring'_ around Trowa, made him sure of one thing: "Not like me, yet probably an angel."

Trowa was no fool, he could see that the other wasn't telling everything, but for now, there were other things in his mind that were in need of clarifying, even if just a bit. "Quatre is really your name?"

The blond smirked. "It's my name among the humans, not my birth name."

"Will you tell me it?"

"I can tell you, but I would rather you remember it."

"Remember?"

Quatre's heart swayed slightly seeing the total confusion in those intense eyes, they were still questioning his reasons to be there, and he was very weak for them. He took off his long coat tossing it in a chair, "I've been looking for a long time… I went where life leads me. Finally the right path, after so long, I could finally find what I've been looking for."

"And it's... on me?" Trowa asked not sure if he was following things correctly.

"On you...?" the angel asked with a doubtful gleam in his eyes.

"Early this morning, when I first stood face-to-face with the demon… he seemed to have doubts about my humanity…" Trowa tried recall the exact details. "And then, just now, you two argued about… something around me." He paused staring at the clear blue eyes deeply "Something that you can't see, yet know is… here."

"It's not about what was around you..." Quatre walked straight toward the other, placing his hand covered with a white glove in the middle of Trowa's chest saying, "I was looking for you, Trowa Barton".

"You said we hadn't met before."

"I said I've never met Trowa Barton before and this is true."

"What that supposed to mean?"

"I would rather take time to explain some things for you, Trowa. It will be quite overwhelming. When we first met your name was Triton, Triton Bloom."

Overwhelming? Much more than that for sure. Trowa was sure that the angel should be confusing him with someone else. He never changed his name, he remembered pretty well his entire life. That conversation couldn't be right. But on the other hand, the things that he was feeling... just to be near the other made his mind, his body, his heart throb. He needed an explanation, really needed it.

"Soon you will remember, try not to think too much for now…" With the intent to avert Trowa's attention off those thoughts, he took off his gloves, showing small and delicate hands with white claws. They weren't long and sharp because they had been cut and sanded. "To be able to live among humans, passing unnoticed, I needed to hide a lot of things." He let his fingers tracing the biceps curve on the muscular arm, skin touching skin, an electrical current making both shiver.

"So, you found me. What will happen now?"

The blond smiled kindly, his hand shifting from the arm to the strong shoulder. He lifted his head to look straight in the green eyes. "Doesn't matter to me, stay or leave, whatever you want. Since we are together, any place is the right place, any time is the right time."

"What… what are you saying?"

The angel moistened his pink lips, "Very deep inside, you do know, don't you?" His hands slid down the firm chest, fingers sneaking beneath the fabric of Trowa's shirt to touch the hard ribbed muscles, "Can't you feel?"

Trowa closed his eyes letting the blissful sensation spread all over his body, just by feeling the other's skin. "Yet, I don't know what it means."

"You don't need to, stop trying, you will remember…" the angel cupped the human face, slowly led him to lean in the direction of his lips. It was only a light brush, but both felt a very strong connection between them, resonating inside their souls.

"God, I missed you…" the blond whispered, his wet eyes brightening with the blue light inside his tears.

"I can't quite comprehend…" Trowa said with a hint of panic showing in his voice. He was overwhelmed by all the feelings, incapable to deny them and, also, incapable to bear them.

"It's all right, don't think that much… I'm here, I found you..."

"It's too much, you're hiding too much… Even you, you're hiding yourself, aren't you?"

"My angel beauty? Yes, with a spell…"

"At least… can I see you?" Trowa let his long fingers stroke the pale delicate face, intoxicated by the sort of homecoming feeling.

The angel still smiled tenderly, his fingers leaving the other's body to search for the laces of his own shirt. He took it off and used one of his claws to do a long scratch along his right wrist. There was no blood on the cut, just a soft aquamarine light shone. Immediately a white seal in the form a bracelet appeared around his wrist; it was the most intricate mixing of symbols that the human had ever seen _[7]_. Quatre whispered some words in a language that no human could comprehend, and it broke, vanishing in the air.

At the hand and arm junction appeared, encasing the pale skin, two topaz jewelry, forming open wings, between them, an obsidian one formed a small shield. Trowa's eyes were fixed on it, his finger tips moving by themselves to touch the delicate jewelry. Underneath it appeared some unknown letters, just slightly darker than the skin color; the birthmarks that it was known that every angel had.

It was Quatre's true name written in the angel's language.

When Trowa finally lifted his eyes to find the angel's face what he saw as quite shocking. Quatre still the same, but also different. There was no way, no words on Earth that allowed him to describe what changed. It was the same small sweet frame, the short golden hair, the long bangs hiding a bit of those clear blue eyes, the soft pink delicate lips. Yet, now he also was almost surreal, ethereal and devastatingly beautiful.

Quatre found amusement in the surprised wide green eyes and the agape mouth. He very gently reached, pulling the tall man down to kiss him again. Trowa was far too lost to not let himself be led. Their mouths touched lightly, the angel's lips were cold now. He didn't remember noticing warmth before, but they also didn't feel cold.

They sought each other's lips, tongues tangling, deepening the kiss. Trowa savored the different sensation, to feel the cold inside the angel's mouth. Quatre grabbed the waistband of the other shirt, tugging it over his head almost desperately; the touch, Trowa's smell and taste after so long making him out of control himself.

Trowa let himself be embraced tightly, his hands groping the angel's back, finding a prominent pair of scars right behind the scapula. He glanced over the shoulder to see them, rounded in the center with two long slices on the column line, it looked like it had been painful.

"Your wings…?"

"Cut and stripped…" the angel said softly. "I lost them very long ago, for a very good reason," he caressed the tall face shoving his long bangs off the green eyes. "I don't regret it. Every time I found you… made it worth it, I don't regret it at all. Don't want to talk about this, everything I want now is you…" The angel gathered Trowa near him, grounding their bodies together. The bond between was too strong.

Trowa surprised himself being so strongly aroused. He let himself be pushed toward the bed with not exactly delicate hands undoing his pants' laces. His short-circuited brain just being able to react by instinct, quite more passively that he ever expected. His bare body fell on the soft bed after his shoes were kicked off; the feeling of cold lips kissing and licking him hungrily, sliding across the neck, biting his Adam's apple, made his desire blaze. He even noticed the angel undressing.

The angel's touches were so needy and possessive, almost a bit harsh, spreading his long muscular legs open and crawling between them.

"I… I don't know… maybe we should…"

"Stop thinking… try just feeling… does this feel like an unfamiliar sensation to you?"

He lifted a leg, biting the inner thigh, the toned skin being lightly marked. Trowa shivered, incapable of denying that his whole body was trembling, wanting the touches. That wasn't just the physical reaction to that killing seduction, it was more... deep inside, he knew it; that feeling of home, of right, seemed just right being with that celestial being.

Quatre stopped just a second, both of hands cupping Trowa's face looking directly in his green, clouded by desire, eyes, "God… I love you so much…" He kissed him tenderly almost reverently, in a way that made the human think the roles were inverted there; after all, the other was the divine one.

The thought was just washed away when his lips slid across his jaw, crossing his chest and causing a shiver of arousal, feeling the moistening cold find its way down, his knees bending up instinctively to give a better access for the angel's tongue.

His head was thrown back, his knuckles white grabbing the sheets. Trowa wanted him, wanted to be filled by the angel, wanted to feel complete, wanted to remember, to be able to find things about himself, about both of them. Somehow he knew that theirs souls were tangled, bound by the exquisite feel of love. With a moan echoing in the room, he voiced in a last attempt:

"What were we?"

One last question before his rationality was razed by the angel's touches inside him. He just let himself be drowned in the storm of feelings and desire when the answer came in a whisper full of emotion:

"Soulmates… we are soulmates."

" _I can't escape this now"_

 _(TBC...)_

* * *

 _Diana Lua_

 _Diana C. Figueiredo_

 _Written in: May e Nov/2016 - Published: Feb/19/2017_

 _Beta reader: Cylina Nightshade (Feb/2017)_

 _Last Change: Feb/19/2017_

* * *

 ** _Notes:_**

 _[6]_ This thing about the wing's shadows was inspired in the Supernatural series.

 _[7]_ This seal is similar at the one in Crimson Spell, that the demon inside Val have in his wrist (it appears there in the chapter 8, volume 2)

* * *

 _# That Quatre x Trowa scene, definitely wasn't in the plot, but it popped out and I decided to let it be. The reason the scene was that big is because **Sak. Hokuto-chan** thinks their background story was such a interesting thing and keeps bombing me with questions all about it.  
Yet, upset me a little that this lime came before the main couple… :(  
I hope, at least, that you enjoyed it. They were a background pairing and I don't have the intention to write much about them. _

_# Finally things began to unroll, starting the physical action (Lemon 2x1 next chapter! ^_^)  
(However, it will take some more, three or four chapters, until the other physical actions, like fights and things like that)._

 _# Thanks for the reviews, they help me a lot too, especially because of blockage._

 _# Of course, thanks a lot to **Cylina Nightshade** , for the revision and all help with the english. ^_^_

 _ **So, curious or just bored with all that sappiness?**_


	7. Feelings

**Warning:** Lemon Duo x Heero (finally ne!)

* * *

 **Where my demons hide**

 **06\. Feelings**

 _(Heero's POV)_

" _When you feel my heat_

 _Look into my eyes_

 _It's where my demons hide_

 _It's where my demons hide"_

"What do you want from me?"

Was what I heard as soon as I opened my eyes. I wasn't sure how much time had passed; the daylight had faded and the room was dark and cold. I hadn't slept much at all and my body had become stiff from staying flat on my back; I hadn't moved an inch, afraid of disturbing Duo's rest.

He had been soundly asleep. I almost hadn't felt cold with his body very tightly wrapped around me. He was all very warm, the broken leg placed over my thigh, the other lying alongside mine, touching it from the hip until the feet, one arm thrown across my chest, his own torso was almost all over mine. Having him this way seemed like proof of his trust in me, but he probably would strongly deny if it was pointed out.

I woke to find those purple eyes plainly, very near, looking straight into me. He was on top of me, pillowing his chin on his cupped hands in the middle of my chest. It took me more than a moment to try ordering my thoughts enough to answer him.

"I… 'm sorry... for before…"

It was the first thing that came to my mind. After what I had heard him whispering during sleep, actually, the way he whispered, was very difficult to get over my wounded pride and admit that I just wanted to be near him, enjoy his proximity, his warmth.

"You've already said that… more than once..."

He seemed to be in such good mood, smiling mischievously with a devilish glint in his eyes. Clearly showing me that he wasn't buying that answer at all.

"There is anything else that I can do for you?" I tried to move, but he didn't let me; I could only just turn aside in an attempt to hide some of the blushing in my face.

"You tell me," he shot back, with a smart brightness in his face. Like he knew about the scythe, more than that, he knew that I was trying to hide it inside my thoughts. "I don't understand you…". He kept staring intently at me, dipping his chin on his cupped hands to get near, saying in a thick voice, "I need to be sure about what you want from me..."

I was staring back at him intently as well, not fully understanding what he was asking me, not really ready to confess what I wanted. He was so beautiful; my mind was in a blank loop, focused in his soft full red lips. My fingers moved by themselves touching them, he was just so near.

My eyes find the rounded scars on my wrist and I wondered if that thing in his bite could still be lingering in my blood.

His eyes narrowed a bit, a fun sparkle dancing in it, and he showed a sexy smile beneath my fingertips.

Apparently not, but even if there were still some traces of it, it wouldn't be enough to explain everything I had been feeling. He wouldn't make this easier for me. He was in a really good mood and I had a feeling that he was showing his personality for the first time: it was a little impish. He probably was enjoying making me squirm.

"I…" what? After all, what did I want? What was I feeling? I've told him that this wasn't about sex. Sure I was very attracted to him, but it was more than that.

"You…?" He encouraged, licking his bottom lip and, very lightly, my thumb that sat there. "What do you want from me... Heero?"

I held my breath with the languid way he said my name. For sure he did it on purpose, making a pause and smiling like that. He was so enticing and I hardly needed to be seduced.

"I don't know..." I tried babbling, knowing he would notice immediately my lie. My brain still insisting on this and my heart wasn't ready to admit, but my body… already knew what it wanted.

"Liar…" he whispered after moving even closer over my chest, making me feel the stirring of his breath against my lips and more of his weight over me. My fingers sliding over the curve of his jaw, that, even still bruised, was just perfect.

"I'm not sure…"

His smile grew a bit when he licked his bottom lip again, I felt his hot breath warming my lips and I just forgot all about thinking. Who was I trying to deceive? Not him for sure…

I let my fingers slip to the back of his neck trying to pull him just that little distance that allowed me to reach those lips that I wanted so badly. Still, it seemed like he was provoking me; he didn't give an inch, not allowing me to kiss him like he was daring me to declare that I want.

"You need to tell me Heero..." He insisted, his lips brushing mine. Those amazing eyes locked on mine, his long eyelashes covering them a bit. I wasn't sure, but there was something different, something deep inside those eyes.

"You…" I breathed in his mouth, "I want you…"

He closed his eyes for a second, I felt him shiver hard. When he opened them, his mischievous smile grew before finally letting me taste him.

His lips were like velvet, warm and soft beneath my tongue's tip. He opened his mouth letting me deepen the kiss, it was exquisite when I slid my tongue inside to find his own tangling with mine. His passivity didn't last long, vanishing with his hands cupping my face. He angled me to devour my mouth, taking all the control. When his tongue, his lips and teeth ravished my mouth, he slid his body over mine, his leg going between mine, carefully pressing my groin. I panted with the contact, vaguely noticing that he was being cautious about his own injuries, and restrained my own will to rub against him.

He kissed me until my lips were swollen and I was barely capable of breathing. It was a tortuous, sexy and hot kiss, very different from that blurred first one; I was even more aroused.

I panted harder with his lips going down my neck, his hands finding their way under my shirt, his claws ghosting on my skin making me shiver and moan. I was burning with desire for him, and completely surrendered.

A distant corner of my mind remembered the anger when he insinuated that I wanted to fuck him. I wasn't sure what had changed or, maybe, I didn't want to know. Could it be just about the role, after all, he was showing a very dominating behavior, leaving no doubt who would be fucked here. And I didn't care at all, if he was offering this, who was I to turn him down?

He lifted his torso a bit, a little awkward trying not stress his broken wing, to lift my shirt; I was finishing taking it off and was almost stuck in it when I felt his mouth eagerly over my nipples. I gasped in pleasure and manage to get rid of the fabric and sink my hand in his hair; a long moan echoing on the walls.

He warmed with his breath and lick, lightly biting, surprisingly careful to not let his fangs puncture my skin. I bucked my hips up instinctively, pressing my erection against his abs. Even though his skin was soft, his muscles were like steel and it was almost painful.

My eyes find a damn satisfied sexy smile on his face when he lifted his head up to look at me. He looked like a predator enjoying his prey, one hell of a beautiful predator.

His fingers found the waistband of my pants, his tongue making a burning trail down over my chest, with no specific path, just tracing the curves of my own hard muscles. His eyes still locked on mine when he pulled my pant's laces with his teeth. I had never seen such an enticing expression in my life.

Yet, he needed to sit down to be able to take off my pants and his own.

I sat too, beside him, trying to sort some rational thoughts in my mind, kissing open mouth against his shoulder, my hand touching the feathers of his good wing. The warnings from my friends didn't matter; the truth was that I wanted him. I wanted him since the first time I saw his eyes, the sadness, the solitude, the pain inside, in that dark dungeon. Still what I wanted was all of him, not just a quick fuck with an exotic beautiful creature; I wanted to make him mine.

"Duo…" my whispering was muffled by his heated skin, "... I've told you, it's not about _this_ …"

He tilted his head graciously looking at me with clouded eyes, I felt him grabbing hard at one of my thighs, the pressing of his claws walked the line between just bruising and ripping my skin. "If you say so…" He said with lips against mine. He bit the bottom lip, sucking at it, "... but I can feel that your desire is strong…" His hand suggestively going up, the claws brushing my inner thigh making me shiver and moan, "...in more than one way." He suddenly held my arousal and I threw my head back, completely incapable of denying or refusing him.

He twisted himself to face me, his mouth devouring mine. I saw him fidgeting uncomfortably, a glimpse of pain showing in his eyes.

"Sorry… maybe we shouldn- …" I saw myself saying, even as I was burning like hellfire for him. He was still too injured to have sex, especially because he had given every sign that it would be a bit wild.

He didn't let me finish, probably as much aroused as me. "You don't want to stop…" he declared, his voice husky against my ear.

"I don't…"

He showed an outrageous smile when his hands found the sides of my waist with a bone-cracking grip. A small reminder of how easily he could kill me. He laughed at my thought, but instead of feeling offended I was awed at hearing the sound for the first time.

And then I found myself strongly pinned down on the mattress by his body.

Surprised, it took me a moment to catch my breath back. His lips and tongue were already desirously trailing the way down my chest, biting my hipbone a bit hard. I thought I was going crazy when I felt his hand encircling my arousal, the tip of his tongue playing with the head of it, tasting the dripping liquid there. I lifted my head to look at him, just to find that puckish glimpse in those purple eyes directed at me. He very slowly and deliberated licked all my length and took me to the hilt in his mouth.

He ground my hips into the bed while sucking me, swallow my length deep down and up in his mouth. I could only gasp for air grabbing his hair, he made a much too exotic image.

He released me from his mouth and lifted my legs, bending me to reach my entrance with his tongue. The unrelenting touch of his hands, holding my thighs, caressing my sack, the movement of his hot tongue licking there made my whole body ache almost painfully. The sensation of him sliding his tongue inside felt so great, even more with him stroking me at the same time. I thought I couldn't be able to bear much more, yet I had no brain cells left to form a single coherent word and voice it.

Duo rose up, his eyes clouded dark with desire, his lips even more tantalizingly red and swollen. He ghosted his claws up against my chest, then reached for my hand and pulled it to his lips; he sucked two, letting me see his pink tongue dancing around them. He braced himself on his left side and pulled me by my hand in his direction.

"Do yourself…" I understood his invitation when he let go of my fingers, wet and slick with his saliva.

I shifted my body and took him in my mouth eagerly, feeling his tip meet the back of my throat. I was hungry, yearning, and sucked him hard, swirling my tongue, feeling him so hard and hot inside my mouth. I reached for my entrance, using my fingers to stretch it. I used two in a scissoring motion, then three fingers; maybe I could have taken more time at it, but I didn't want to wait any longer. It was needed since I wasn't usually on the receiving end, but I was already at my limit; I just needed him too much.

I moaned with him in my mouth, the vibration going through his flesh, and he echoed it, deep, and grabbed my hair, pulling me back. "Ready…" I said feeling the saliva sliding by the corner of my mouth.

If his flushed hot expression hadn't told me that he was at his limit, just as I was, the savage demanding kiss that he gave me did. Just before he suddenly pushed me down, rolling me on my side and spooning me.

His left arm above my body circling my chest in a crushing embrace, the other lifted my leg up, to give him better access. I just tried to breathe and keep calm feeling his hardness pressing on me, trying to relax and not worry. It was kind of late anyway to regret it, not that I was regretting at all, I just was expecting some harsh sex. Instead, his kindness shocked me.

He pressed open-mouthed kisses to my shoulder; his tongue licking all the way from my shoulder to my neck. That wildness vanished from him while he waited for my opening to relax. He placed his mouth over my jugular, feeling my heart rate. He used it to push inside and regulate his small thrusts until he worked all his length inside me.

Spit wasn't the best lube at all, even with him being careful it was still a bit harsh and my heavy breathing became uneven. I was overwhelmed by the conflicting feeling of discomfort and of being filled like that. The initial hurting wasn't greater than the warmth that spread all over my body, because the surprisingly gentle turn of his actions. He covered my neck and ear with butterfly kisses, asking between them in a whisper, "-'s okay?"

I opened my mouth, but was incapable of finding my voice. I took a big gasp of air, feeling all his manhood tightly burning inside me. His hand came up from my chest to my chin, turning my face so he could kiss me. He did it slowly, with open mouth, making me felt drunk on him, dazzled with the passion in it. [8]

It was broken with a wet sound when he slowly moved, a shallow thrust, still waiting for me to adjust. His mouth near mine, his warm breath touching my lips, a saliva line sliding down my mouth to my chin that he stopped with his tongue. His eyes were half closed, pupils dilated in desire. I strongly wished to be in another position, then I could see him better, touch more of him.

He tested his thrusting a bit deeper, intently looking at my reaction. I grabbed his arm on my chest, turning to bury my face on the sheets, moving my hips to meet his. The uncomfortable feeling was minimum, compared to how great he felt. I was ready, I wanted him so damn much. He landed feather kisses on my back and started moved with some rhythm. Sliding in and out of me, deeper and harder, the movements were primal and, yet, gentle. He was one hell of a strong demon, I just couldn't believe how he could balance so well the gentleness with the ferocity of his desire.

I was sweating quite thoroughly, his skin on my back was so heated, "So hot…" All of him quite near, burning me, inside and out. He just grunted against my skin, the sound waves thundering over my body. I fisted the sheets when he let my leg down, the arm enfolding my stomach, the cold of the metal from that vambrace, that he never took off, causing a shudder through me while he pulled me harder against him.

His thrusts became a bit desperate and frenzied. It was making me crazy, I was drunk on pleasure, incapable of bearing all that he was offering me. I just felt overwhelmed and worried that I probably wouldn't be able to keep going much longer.

His hand over my stomach, found its way down to my groin. And I threw my head back crying out an unsteady groan when he grabbed my arousal. I thought to say no to him, but the words died on my tongue. He was panting against my shoulder, hot and wet lips. His hand was slippery and he stroked me the same rhythm as his thrusts. His intoxicating touch set fire to my veins.

Then he was rising, moving his hips to pin me to the mattress, pressing me down, going as deep as he could. I was sure that it gave him some pain, but the thought vanished, because the change of angle sent me to the stars and I forgot how to breathe. Everything went dark when I fell over the edge crying his name shamelessly.

When the world came back to axis, I felt myself completely wrapped by him. I was so caught by the moment that I hadn't even noticed before, but the damn hot feeling inside me left no doubt that he had climaxed too. He languidly kissed my neck, sucking the skin and slightly biting there. "Did I hurt you?"

I thought to move, but my body lay boneless and all I could do was tilt my head up until he could kiss me. "Of course not." I smiled at him, meeting his sparkling eyes. He looked tired, but relaxed, fighting against his heavy eyelashes. I was so full of joy that I couldn't describe, just a small tip of regret about how quick that had been. "Sorry… didn't last long…"

I wanted… more. Wanted all of him, giving him comfort, pleasure; everything he wanted, everything he needed. I didn't remember caring so much about someone before.

He laughed, the sound amazing me for the second time, and rubbed his nose on my cheek saying slowly, like chosen words, "You are… delicious..." I was sure that my face turned fifty shades of red. He just kissed me again, slowly and passionately, open mouthed, making me feel drunk and hungry for more of him. He didn't stop until I was completely breathless.

Just then he slid off me; the moistening in my inner thigh cooling quickly, reminding me that we were in winter and all the heat in the room was coming from his body. He moved away and I turned to face him, seeing the frown when he moved his broken leg and the whimper of pain to find a position that didn't put pressure on his right wing.

"Hurting….?"

He shrugged. "Nothing more than I already was..." After this, he looked at me, eyelashes giving a charming flutter, and just laid besides me, using my legs to support his, and my chest to pillow his head. That appeared to be the most comfortable position for him and his injuries; it also was nice for letting me share his strong body heat.

Duo seemed to have a light on his face: he was flushed, relaxed and satisfied; the sight making me feel triumphant.

"So, I also couldn't manage to hold it long…" he said referring to the injuries and, then, surprised me adding, "Besides, been a long time…"

"Liar..."

He seemed surprised at my immediate reply. I let my fingers shove his bangs off and trace the lines of his strong heart shaped face. "You are too beautiful to not have a long line of beings begging to be fucked by you…"

His eyes became wider. If he had red blood, he'd be sure to have a cute blush now.

"Maybe you forgot, but I live in hell…" I noticed that maybe I hit too near the heart. "And I don't lie," he finished firmly and seriously.

A demon that didn't lie? Had he any idea how… unusual this was? His tone didn't leave much room, so I just preferred to not spoil the mood. "I always thought sex was an easy thing to find in hell..."

"Well…" he appeared uncomfortable, "not this type of sex… things there are kind of... violent."

That was harsh. My mind picturing how much a gorgeous creature like him would be chased there; his slender form didn't exactly give evidence to his tremendous strength. I remembered his torn pants and the scratches on his inner upper thighs. Was that what he was fighting? To not be raped? That made me shiver and I found myself looking at the scratches, almost faded, on the leg bent over me.

His hand came to my face making me look to him. "Doesn't matter anymore… it turned into dust and smoke at the end."

"So, despite the pain, nice and good sex is something to be… savored," he smiled seductively, his lips finding mine in a very gentle kiss. He accommodated himself again along my body, nuzzling my chest.

I found the tip of the sheet and try to clean the inside of my thighs, and let myself be wrapped by him, seeking his warmth. I wished to light the fireplace, but the sight of his sleeping, beautiful face, all surrendered over my chest, blew away every will to get out of bed.

The last days were being an emotional roller-coaster, but after the release of my body, even my mind still full and unease, I catnapped a little. I woke with the cold reaching my skin. He still soundly sleeping over me, feeling so good, like was the perfect right place for him to be. I stroked his hair, detangling the rest of the undone braid, losing the locks, enjoying the feeling of it between my fingers.

His arms tightened around my chest and he rubbed his hips against the side of my leg very suggestively, his lips touching my bare skin. The exact way he had done in the afternoon when whispering _that_ name. For a moment my guts twisted and I waited for him to say it again. I looked the other way, facing the dark wall, a strong will to get out of here, imagining what he was thinking, dreaming... about what he had thought before.

What kind of name was Solo? Not a demon's name, nor an angel name, could it be a human name? Maybe the same type of name that Duo was. Could he be another shinigami?

...

* * *

 _Diana Lua_

 _Diana C. Figueiredo_

 _Written in: May and Jun/16 - Published: Apr/03/17_

 _Beta Reader: Cylina Nightshade (Apr/2017)_

 _Last change: Apr/06/17_

* * *

 _[8] I had a sketch of this scene but got it wet on a day with too much rain. I didn't have the inspiration to draw it again, but it can be found in the facebook album. (Link on my profile)_

* * *

# _Like I did with the third chapter I'm splitting this one into two parts. Not as much because of the size (even was again over 5k words), but because I'm still with the blockage. Even all the chapter was already 98% written, I have a lot of trouble to work on it, and this 2% was really hard to come out._

 _I'm actually upset about the last one, I didn't receive the return I was waiting for and can't keep wondering what went wrong.  
_

 _So, I thought would be better update one part than nothing.  
_ _Maybe I will be lucky and get some reviews that can get me a clue what was wrong, or if it is just my imagination and insecurity._

 ** _So, hope you enjoyed this part, there is a second round in the next part. Let me know if you liked (or not :) too)!_**


	8. Feelings (continuation)

- _ **Cylina** have been my lifesaver with the English. Thank you so very much! :) _

_\- Thanks for the reviews! They really helped and cheered me up so I could finish this part quickly! Loved all of them!_

 **Warning:** Light lemon Duo x Heero

* * *

 **Where my demons hide**

 **06\. Feelings** (continuation)

Despite my concerns, he didn't say that name.  
And despite my annoyance, I held still, serving as a pillow for him.

Staring at the wall where the fireplace should be, it was so dark that I almost couldn't see it, I kept stroking his hair as lightly as I could, not really able to sleep even though my body was a bit weak.

In my mind, my feelings were all mixed up. I'm not sure how we ended up having sex; since he was so ready to get away; since just the day before he was so angry when he had thought that all I wanted was to 'fuck' him; since it was pretty clear to me that was not about that.

The only thing clear to me was that he had woke up in a different mood after the afternoon sleep. And I really wanted to believe that was because we felt closer after that episode with the healer; his behavior after that was almost docile, maybe it was the tiredness, the stress, the pain… I wanted it to be any of those things. What I didn't want it to be was a result of whatever or whoever he had dreamed.

Warm fingers found my chilly face and pulled me by my chin to face the other side, "Hey... " Because the lack of light, his face was covered by shadows, but I felt the weight of his staring "what's... the matter?"

"I…" didn't have a clue about what had woken him or what to tell him, "... it's cold in here."

We were so close that I could see him frown, and it was written all over his face that he hadn't bought my excuse at all. Still, he took a moment to release me, so I could get up and go to the fireplace. It gave me some trouble to find the flintstone and dried turf _[9]_ in the dark and light up the fire, but I had no intention of calling a servant to bring it _[10]_. So, by the time I got a steady flame, I was freezing and literally ran back to the bed.

Duo grabbed me laughing, holding and kissing me, letting all his body hovering over mine while I shivered inside his arms. He even gathered the sheet and pulled it over us.

"Better?" he asked and I had to nod; not that the place was warmed that fast, but having him like that, so… at ease, just made me feel good because it seemed like I was able to make him feel good too.

Every inch of my skin was seeking the warmth of his, and it was nice to have an excuse to just keep him near. "You are hot." The double meaning was purposeful and I was glad when he laughed, shifting his body at my obvious attempt to grind our bodies together forgetting for an instant about his injuries.

"Hell blood benefits," he said, referring to his thick black demon blood, that was a lot warmer than human blood.

"It's nice."

"So… will you tell me what was bothering you?"

He had really noticed it, however, there was no way on Earth that I could explain what my doubts were. "The cold…" I met his eyes and he was again with that intent staring, like he was searching for something. The weak illumination that the firelight offered making difficult to read his expression.

I was kind of surprised that he didn't push the matter and just kissed me. "Still cold?"

"A bit…"

"Then I should warm you better…" He slid his lips until my neck searching for the spot over my jugular, kissing there, then sucking hard, making me feel my heartbeat beneath his lips. My skin there still sensitive due to the bruises from before, and leaving no doubt that a hickey would be added to the marks. Not that I cared.

With his naked body willing, rubbing against mine the cold just disappeared. Also, every uneasy thought disappeared as well when he kissed my mouth again, slowly tangling his demanding tongue with mine. He pressed his torso against mine, in a lingering way that made me forget everything else. The only thing that mattered was that moment, his body and my body, the heat between us.

I embraced him, digging my fingers into his ribs, pulling him hard against me, feeling the strong need to be with him, like a drowning man that needs air. I had forgotten his injuries and he flinched but didn't stop me. Our eyes met and he was smiling, with that sexy brightness in his eyes, god he was just so… so much. "Want you… all of you, Duo," I heard my voice saying on its own. I had no intention of saying that, but when it came out I knew I meant every word, actually I meant much more.

He held my face, staring and deeply searching for something. The firelight was letting his eyes darken, hidden by his bangs. Anxious, he kissed me again, then grabbed the sides of my waist to turn me on my side again.

Guess that was the best position for his injuries, but I resisted, cupping his face making him look at me. "Want to see you. Want you to look into my eyes."

He became serious for an instant; the expression on his face, the feeling deep inside his eyes, unreadable.

I let my fingers brush his long hair, the strands cascading over his shoulder and back. I touched the feathers of his good wing, mesmerized by the effect that the flickering firelight had in that dark softness, the effect that the light had all over him. I couldn't believe that I had such an amazing creature in my arms. Or better, that I was in his arms.

He took my hand and placed a kiss on the back, rising up from me and moving to the corner of the bed bringing me by hand. He sat near enough to the edge for the broken wing to drape over the side of the bed, so it wouldn't be pressed. His leg was accommodated over the pillow and he leaned against the headboard, sprawling the other wing over the mattress; it was so long that the tip reached the far corner.

"Come here…"

For a demon, he had the most gentle expression in his eyes and I let him pull me near until I was straddling his hips _[11]_. I blushed to the roots of my hair; being in that position seemed to be a bit childish and I just felt embarrassed. I kissed him trying to forget the discomfort and tried to find a better position for my thigh; the cut from the last battle bothering me from being stretched. I tried to arrange the bandage that had loosened a bit and choose to ignore all of that, just because in that way I was able to see his face, his incredible eyes, able to touch and kiss him as much as I wanted.

"Let me see…" he murmured inside my mouth, making me look at him, not understanding. "You said that you want me to look inside your eyes, then you need to show everything to me…" His fingers traced my face, his eyes staring hard into me. I'm not sure, but it seemed like he had some sort of… pain? longing?... in his voice and inside his eyes.

"I…" was confused, not quite understanding what he was asking in that so affectionate way.

His smile was tender when he placed a hand on my bare chest, "Here… let me see what you are feeling…" It took me a moment looking at his hand, warm and inoffensively resting just over my heart with those black strong claws, wondering about what exactly he was asking.

"You already said you wanted me… so why are you still fighting against this...?" he whispered so gently, nuzzling the shell of my ear; I wasn't sure if I shivered at it or for the sound of his words. "Let it go. Surrender to what you're feeling. Show it to me… please."

The last word was so low that I couldn't tell if it was just my imagination hearing it so full of need. But I finally understood what he was asking me. I felt his feather kisses going down my neck, over my shoulder and he buried his face there, letting his arms embrace me tightly, his hands going up and down the line of my spine, warming my skin. I had fallen hard for him, probably at the very moment that I put my eyes on him, there was no reason to deny it, except that he was a demon, except that he had refused me two days ago, except that he was willing and ready to go just some hours before, in the afternoon.

I had a strong feeling that I would be hurt at end of this. Even so, it was already too late. Whatever his reasons were, I was already too far down the rabbit hole to get out; the only thing that I could do was keep going.

"Why?"

"'Cause you want me see to it… and 'cause I need to see it… again."

"Again?"

"It's been a long, long time, Heero…"

He looked up to find my eyes. His eyes looked intense and feverish in a way that I couldn't understand. He cupped my face, pulling me in for a kiss, a chaste kiss, just a brush of his warm lips, but there were so much behind it. He was a creature that I wanted to decipher and had no idea how.

I did like he asked. I let go, stopped fighting, surrendered to him; his reasons or all of his secrets didn't matter. I was deeply in love with him, nothing could change it. It was a kind of release, letting this sensation, these feelings, spread over my chest, over all my body and inside my soul.

He pulled me against him hard, holding me tight, his head perfectly fitting below my chin, his good wing moving to circling us; it was incredible feeling the shelter made by the soft black feathers.

Duo shivered in our embrace and stayed there for a long moment, until I tilted his face up, the expression there made me kiss him strongly and passionately. That warm intimacy becoming something stronger, I let my hands trail his skin so soft to the touch and so strong beneath.

I wanted him so badly, especially feeling him like this… almost open. We kissed and touched each other and it didn't take long until we both were aroused again.

There was no other word than affectionate to describe his expression. I was kissing all his face and his neck, while he grabbed my hips and pressed against me, our erections rubbing together. I was already loose and wet from the round before, I used my fingers to do some more stretching. His arm came around my waist, the metal of the armor cooling the skin at the small of my back, he lifted me to position himself. Then, held me, preventing me from taking him all at once.

He filled me slow and easy, sliding with more delight; I was already sensitive and the feeling was almost too much to bear.

I squeezed my eyes shut, knowing that I was flushed red even in my neck and chest. He gave me some time, holding and embracing me, making me feel impossibly hot inside his arms. The only thought in my head was that I never felt so good in my life. He was smiling against my skin when he started making me move on his lap.

It was a bit different from before, maybe it was the talking, maybe it was that position, I didn't really know, but it seemed to be just about feeling it, slow and passionate, drawing it out. About being close, being with him, with his tender caressing, the breathless kisses.

With his hands holding my waist, easing my weight, helping me with the rolling motion of my hips, with my hands grabbing his shoulders, my hard breathing, my eyes shut, I just didn't want it to end.

He nipped my collarbone and I buried my hands in his thick hair pulling his head back so I could look at his face. His beautiful perfect face, with those big purple eyes glimmering with the firelight. I was so lost and at the same time so found by being with him.

"Duo…" I moaned his name and wanted to be able to voice what I was feeling, but couldn't find the right words or enough brain cells to put it together. "I…"

"I know…" He kissed me, whispering in my mouth. I moaned in his mouth, the kissing became sloppy because we were focused in the rhythm that we had built. "I know…" he repeated grabbing my hips hard, maybe a bit too hard. I sucked his lower lip, he looked dazzling in that firelight, all flushed with that feverish look inside his eyes.

"You are so beautiful… feel so good."

"As much as you…" he replied burying his face on my neck. Shifting our position a little to relieve the weight on his right leg. I wondered about his injuries, but then he was lying back, wrapping his hand around my erection, pumping it hard; I groaned, feeling short of breath. Our eyes were locked to each other when my body went rigid, my mouth released a sob in the sound of his name while my seed was released in the tunnel of his fingers. The tightening of my muscles around him was the last thing missing to bring him to completion, filling me with his essence.

We were both breathless, my heart thumping inside my chest and when he embraced me again I felt the echo of it inside his own. We just stayed for a moment; I was overwhelmed by that completeness, knowing here and now that I couldn't just let him go.

Duo nuzzled and lazily kissed my shoulder, I was boneless laying against him. Probably my weight was crushing his wounded wing against the wood of the headboard, but when I tried to pull myself off, he held me in place. "Stay… it's ok, just a bit more..."

I would give him what he needs, everything he asks me, anything if he just stays with me. There was no way that I could let him go after that. I wanted him to not want to go anymore. "Did you…" I wanted to know if something had changed in his mind, but hadn't the courage to ask.

He tilted his head, face flushed, lips red and swollen and kissed my chin lightly. "I need to…"

My heart squeezed, my arms tightening automatically around him. "How do you always seemed to know what I'm thinking?"

He was placing wet and lazy kisses on my neck, I felt the smile on his lips. "Kind of intelligent guessing…"

"Hn… so you can't read my mind?"

"I can't. There aren't any beings that can do that… would be too unfair to your fragile kind."

This time, the 'fragile' thing hit too near the heart. I probably wasn't good enough for him, still hurt me having him point it out and I stayed silent, not sure what to do next.

"But I can 'read' your feelings…"

It took me a minute to understand, and I blushed harder; that sounded worse than reading my thoughts. "H...how so?"

"Not sure how to explain… it's part of my nature, handling energy. So, I can see the energy that your feelings release… it's like I could read them and that gives me a good idea about what you are thinking. That's all, I can't really see what is inside your mind…"

"Is this a Shinigami's power?"

"You ask too much."

"Because I want to know more about you, be close to you."

"You are already pretty close," he said joking at the fact that he was still inside me. And he was starting to move, but I didn't let him.

"It's not what I'm talking about… you know." I was holding his chin, so I was sure that he was facing me. The mischievous glint disappeared from his eyes when he understood how serious I was.

"You…" he paused, "are the closest person I've had in… almost three hundred years. You know more about me than you should, for your own safety."

That, actually, made me feel good, but, "Three hundred?"

"I'm not exactly the friendly type…" he said trying again to make things light. I let him and moved to finally let him slide out. I flinched with the ache from the cut on my thigh. He also moved himself uncomfortably, turning on his left side lying on the mattress, one hand reaching toward the leg to try to find a better position.

I cleaned myself and toss the sheet out thinking that I should ask for blankets, but not in the middle of the night. I had no idea about the hour, but it was deep in the night. I was glad that the room was warmer, the fire still high. I leaned along him to feel his body heat, noticed that his face was showing pain and tiredness.

I was surprised when he pulled me to find that position that fitted him so well in my arms. He kissed the bruises on my neck whispering, "Sorry about that… I didn't mean to hurt you... I just..."

"It's ok…" My fingers trailing up and down his arm, until finding his hand and entwining our fingers; it really was, I didn't mind, I wanted so much to take care of him. There was no way that I could explain that need, maybe I just want to give him motives to stay.

"Bite." It popped out of my mouth, surprising even me. "You're still injured… let me help..."

His lips stayed still on my skin, just in the right place over my jugular. It took him a moment, and, then, his voice was firm and steady, "You already have."

Our eyes clashed, and I knew what I needed to do to make him understand, to convince him. I just let out all my wanting, the need to make him feel better, the protectiveness that I had over him. "Please… my blood can make you feel better… let me do this, please, Duo."

"It's too soon, Heero..."

Probably he was right, it was just last night; however, he had said that he had drunk just enough to clear up the poison. There'd be no harm in just a bit more. "I'm ok, there's not much that I can do for you… but this, I can…"

He looked at me, his eyes plain. "Please…" I whispered the pleading over his lips and he buried his face on my neck again. After just a heartbeat he started licking and kissing there again, my heart was pounding in my chest when his arm around my waist straightened and his lips press hard, open mouth. I closed my eyes feeling his fangs breaking the skin, he didn't deepen the bite right down, as he was still unsure. Then, I felt the pain and that hot wave spreading really fast through my veins. I melted, relaxing in his arms, trusting my life to him again, without hesitation.

Like the other time, it ended quickly. I felt his hand pressing strongly on the spot to stop the bleeding. I felt much alike: lightheaded like I was in a dream. I didn't notice when he had moved us, and I found myself lying in his arms instead, very conscious about our naked bodies. I tilted my head until finding his mouth, thirsty for him and he let me kiss him, kissing me back this time.

"You need rest," he said, holding me and saying in an almost hypnotic voice. I saw a warm smile on his face, "There, there... be good and rest," and with some amusement treating me like a child again.

My head was too foggy and my body lazy, so it was easy to obey. I felt his lips on my forehead, "Sleep," he whispered warm over my skin just before I slid into dreamland, all cozy in his arms.

" _I can't escape this now"_

 _(TBC…)_

* * *

 _Diana Lua_

 _Diana C. Figueiredo_

 _Written in: May, Oct/2016 and Feb, Apr/2017 - Published: Apr/23/2017_

 _Beta Reader: Cylina Nightshade (Apr/2017)_

 _Last change:_ _Apr/23/2017_

* * *

 _ **Notes:**_

 _[9]_ _Yes, just like the boy scouts. :)_

 _[10] Because lightening fire was quite complicated, in the middle age usually the fire were keep lit up all time and had someone to watch it. It was carried from that main place to others by torches._

 _[11] I have a new sketch with that scene :) think that one was quite good, despite being defeated by Duo's wings and not drawing them yet… so you can see it in the facebook public album, link on my profile._

* * *

 _#_ _I don't know if I can call lemon the sex in this part, ended much lighter than I first wanted. The feelings are too much and I couldn't handle with more description than that..._

 _# About comments... the truth is that they **really** help (besides making me happy and to want to write more and more). Before, I was completely unable to finish this one, and without the reviews that I received I probably I would be still blocked. __Appear that my blockage was solved for now... but everything (really everything) that you wanted to tell or ask me about this story will be very welcome! :)_

 _#_ _The next one will be Duo's POV (finally again) and will have some more revelations about his past. I have a surprise too... don't know if I will be able to finish in time to post together, but I have been working on a side story about Duo and Solo... :)_

 ** _Liking? Want more? Let me know..._**


	9. Sentenced

_\- Sorry, I'm posting a half chapter again! Working too much..._

 _-_ _In this one "Duo is a cuddly cutie ^-^", just like **Cylina** said!_

 **Warning:** a bit of language _._

* * *

 **Where my demons hide**

 **07\. Sentenced**

 _(Duo's POV)_

" _Don't get too close_

 _It's dark inside_

 _It's where my demons hide_

 _It's where my demons hide"_

I woke disoriented by confusing, painful dreams; images of a forgotten very old past mixed with my recent life in hell. It'd been awhile since I dreamed like this; awhile since I actually dreamed at all. I couldn't exactly remember much more than distorted images, but my guts were twisted, breathing hard and my eyes were burning because of the tears that I wouldn't allow to fall.

It took me a moment to realize where I was. I needed to squeeze my eyes shut hard, pushing the damned tears back inside my broken soul where they belonged.

Against all odds, it was surprisingly comforting find the warm weight over my chest; it took all I had to not draw him more over me, embracing him tight, finding some shelter inside his arms. It's amusing that one weak human could make me feel like that, but I knew better than that: it wasn't tied with the physical strength, it's much deeper, inside my needy forsaken heart.

That man… I still didn't completely understand him. He was a 'lord', whatever that title meant among the humans, and a demon hunter, even so he was somewhat pulled to me. He had trusted me since the very beginning, had saved my life, putting his own in my hands quite faithfully, and I hadn't even used the blinding _[12]_ on him. And then, he did it again, for the sake of just making me feel better. How could he trust me that much? How could he have those feelings for me so quickly? Are they even real? Or just my own mind wanting to have it again?

He was deeply asleep, face relaxed, constant breath touching my skin; seen now, his hair that should be a mess after all we did last night, but appeared be just tousled in a sexy way that suited him a lot. I had vaguely noticed before, he was quite exotic with that Asian heritage contrasting with indigo eyes; I probably was just to overwhelmed to… appreciate it sooner. There weren't dark circles in his eyes, nor sign of fatigue, and for that I was glad, once I had been careful on drinking from him the second time.

I needed to admit that, besides there was no real need for it, I was feeling a lot better. I needed to admit that it would be just easier if he had given me back my blade, but then… I would have just gone away and we... Not that there could be any chance that _this_ goes any further. At least I was able to remember a bit of who I was one day. And I never was the type to take the easy path.

It was bittersweet. I was running and hiding for so long that I had forgotten how to feel. Now it seemed like I was waking up, like removing the numbness which had been over my whole body, like getting out of a gray place filled with just sadness and regret, to that hint of something good. On the other hand... it was a really painful reminder of what I lost... even more by knowing that I would never have it back again.

I carefully detangled our bodies and climbed out the bed. He shivered, grabbing the pillow, but did not wake up. I went to feed the fire, it was dying and I didn't want him feeling cold, even if it was inevitable without the contact with my body, before walking to the bath chamber, satisfied to be able to walk on my own again. The water there was icy cold, but I didn't care, I could clean myself and remove the dirty bandages from my leg because, of course, our activity from the night had caused it to bleed again.

I put back the loose pants that I had been using, and was wondering about removing or not the bandages that were wrapped around my abs, holding my wing steady, when I noticed someone coming through the hallway.

It was amusing the fact that I knew right away who it was. If the angry feeling hadn't given him away, the swearing in Chinese, just after the sound of the door opening in the other room, had.

I just stayed still; he left and then came back, kept cursing me in his mother language, that for me wasn't any trouble to understand anyway. He was upset and irritated, and I was kind of expecting him to come look for me. So, it wasn't any surprise to see him entering, but, even though he was holding his sword up when he walked in, I could see in his eyes that he wasn't really expecting to find me there.

The surprise oozed fast, being replaced with a mix of confused feelings; it took just a second for him make up his mind, changing his attitude for a grumpy and arrogant one, firmly stepping inside and closing the door at his back.

"I need to admit that you have guts."

I smirked in his direction, facing his cold gaze that obviously didn't have any effect on me.

"Why are you still here?"

He asked, his dark gaze heavy, analyzing me. Even with the hint of irritation in his voice, he kept his tone low, which meant that Heero still slept and whatever he wanted to tell me, he didn't want his lord hearing.

"Answer me!" he demanded, and I just hardened my eyes, crossing my arms in front of my chest. I was a little pissed with his attitude, a little pissed with myself too, because deep down I knew I shouldn't stay here anymore. "What do you want from him after all?"

"What _I_ want? Isn't he the one keeping me here?" I could try to just blind him, but my curiosity toward his bold behavior was taking over me, even if I was risking being really pissed off, why not poke a stick at it? It wasn't like his bite could do some damage to me.

"Are you saying that he is 'keeping' you against your will?"

But, someway, that impertinent guy was really good at pushing all my wrong buttons. I didn't answer, but chewed this bitter on my tongue, because he was so damn right, they couldn't keep me against my will. And the motives for me staying were... just selfish.

He was an impatient man, with no fear for actually upsetting me, and kept pushing. "Just blood wasn't enough? You needed to have some… fun too?"

"This is none of your business."

"Wrong!" he stepped forward and straightened his curved sword, pointing it at my neck. "You hurt him… again!"

"Nothing against his own will…" I flashed a small smirk, on purpose, knowing that would really raise his anger, though it was totally true anyway. Heero had given me the blood, he wanted to give it to me, so, what was the problem that I had accepted it?

Like I was expecting, the grip on his sword faltered for a heartbeat, shocked with my words, and then the room was filled with pure rage. He gathered himself and dared to step further, defiant.

"You foul beast… you would be dead if wasn't for him. How could you harm him like that?"

For sure, I did not need him reminding me of that. Even if I hadn't asked for it, it's not that I wasn't grateful, but this was also none of his business. He was crossing the line he should stay behind for his safety; knowing what they knew about me, it surprised me that he thought that he could threaten me like that. Although I have no intention, since the very beginning, of harming these humans, I also wouldn't allow this kind of crap.

"This is the second time you threaten me..." and I was the one that stepped forward, let his sword come inside my personal space, almost touching my neck. His eyes were wide open, but he didn't falter with his hold.

"This is the second time that you hur-"

I didn't let him finish, grabbed his hand and pushed him to the wall behind with the other. It was so fast that he didn't have time to blink, the dry 'thud' of his back against the stones was followed by a gasp of the air leaving his lungs. "Just because you are Heero's underling, I will give you one last chance. The next time you think about it… better be truly prepared to confront me."

His agape mouth said nothing, still too surprised from not having seen me moving. I brought the sword near my face, by the hand that I was holding, and licked it. There was a tingling, a small burning sensation, just like I had expected because of the smell I had sensed.

"Dragon blood…" I whispered and noticed the surprise and a hint of... fear coming from him, finally something causing this reaction on him, yet I wasn't sure what had caused it. "If you think that this can do some damage to me… better you seriously reconsider your... attitude." I released his hand, and before he could react, I held his blade in the middle with my fingers and just broke it. Then, there was no more rage in the room, just shock and surprise; I suppose that was the right reaction after seeing me breaking the sword like a stick just like that. I hurled the point part in the wall next to his head, piercing it deep in between the rocks. The burning in my skin was very low, maybe that would work very well with the ordinary demons that he was used to fighting with, but it was too weak for me.

"Heero's underling or not, I won't let another threat without a proper response."

I turned my back and walked away from him. Took a long moment for him to gather himself and between all things that I could be expecting, he caught me by surprise.

"I'm no one's underling."

I saw the pride even in his voice. So it wasn't by chance that he had such an amount of liberty to talk with Heero then. I turned to look at him; he seemed a bit lost, making no real effort to try to take the blade's piece off the wall, knowing that he couldn't.

"Heero is my friend, I'm worried about him…"

"No need…" Independent of my wants, the reality was that I must leave, as quick as possible. I didn't care about putting him at ease, even so, "I'm leaving soon."

"Because of that…" he started, but the words died in his throat, I could figure out some angst, some regret, some care, but wasn't able to sort his feelings right. He turned to face me, looking straight with those defiant black eyes of his. "Even you can let him go that easy…" he tried again, but still uncannily holding it back.

He shrugged giving up, walked past me, toward the door that lead to the hallway, not the one that he entered. I thought that he was just going away, but he stopped, the door handle in hand, and said low and serious, "You know he is … head over heels for you, don't you?"

I didn't answer other than nod, just because there was something more that just made me curious, something deep mixed in his feelings that I couldn't sort out.

"He is an idiot..." he said almost just for himself, but then he looked at me fiercely. "Show some respect and stop raising his hopes…"

"I'm raising nothing…"

"Yes, you are, while you're staying and letting yourself... be involved, you are!" He said with that arrogant tone and just stepped out and away, closing the door, leaving me speechless staring at it. So impertinent.

Shit, that mother fucker was right. So damn right that he got under my nerves, got underneath my skin. What was I fucking doing here? I shouldn't be here, I shouldn't have let this come so far, I shouldn't… so many things that I couldn't even name. If it wasn't for that promise made so long ago… I shouldn't even being existing anymore.

I heard a sound coming from the other room, it broke my lethargy. When I stepped in there, Heero was awake and looked straight to me with wide eyes; he had his shirt in place, half getting inside his pants; the thick blanket a tangled mess on the mattress, a tray of food sitting on the bench and a couple of buckets with hot water. Hell, no one could say that insolent Chinese wasn't... attentive.

"Duo?" he came toward me, showing worry and confusion in his deep blue eyes. I couldn't help noticing that he was a bit taller than me, maybe an inch or two, just very little; it was noticeable just now that both were standing straight like that. "What happened?"

He was full of doubts and oddly uncertain about how to act around me; he raised a hand, but retracted it back before touching me, and I had to suppress showing that I wanted his touch.

"The water is hot, go clean yourself before it gets cold…"

I turned my back to him, looking out the window not giving him much room. He stayed still for a moment, his uncertainties grew, but he chose to take one bucket and walked inside the bath chamber. He left the door cracked open and I heard a small gasp; he had faced the broken blade buried on the wall.

I tried to focus on the blue sky, an old remembrance of a time that I used to appreciate the sun rising; I had just lost it anyway. I just stayed there, in front the narrow barred window thinking nothing while hearing the sounds from the other room. It was fifth day that I was there, in his castle, under his care, under his trust, which I really didn't know how I gained in first place. It was already too much time. I had been brought, dragged there with a big fuss… I had no idea how or what kind of rumors had spread about me; I should expect the worst. I should walk away without looking back.

And that was just so damn hard to do. We are already bound in some inexplicable way that I'm not sure if I wanted to, or should, understand.

"Your leg looks fine… and the wing?" he said behind me, his hand lightly touching the feathers of my broken wing. With the confusion before I had forgotten about the bandages. "Not yet."

"You look better..."

"I am." I tilted my head to shoot him a sideways look from behind my bangs and felt some of his apprehension vanishing. "Thanks."

"Well, maybe…" he started, his hand lingering over my arm.

"No." I didn't let him continue, knowing about what he was thinking. "That was more than enough, your body needs time to recover your blood. A couple of months, at least."

He looked a bit confused, but took my word; wise, once I had much more knowledge than him. I could see all signs of him looking for something that could be used as an excuse for me to stay, and I was damned if I wasn't too.

"You need to get back some strength already." I pointed to the food; looked like he hadn't noticed it before, and his stomach found that time to agreed with me. He walked there, trying to hide his embarrassment, taking it to the bed and started to eat with very polite manners. I was sure that he was forcing himself to not just wolf it down; he should be starving after spending all afternoon and night with me without eating anything and, also, having me drink him.

I stood there looking at him. He turned his eyes to me offering a slice of something white and soft, just being polite because he knew that I didn't need food; though I probably could eat and taste it, I had never tried.

I smiled and refused. That Chang guy was right, I shouldn't raise his… expectations anymore, but just the way he had to look at me... it made me want things that I didn't deserve to have. I walked and sat on the mattress in front of him, the tray of food between us.

"You know I'm going now..."

"But your wing..."

"I can walk."

"You could..." he did not finish, not really needing, I knew how he desired ask me to stay. And fuck, to be honest, I wanted to stay.

"No, I can't. Neither of us will be safe…"

He was puzzled, concerned about something that he didn't dare say out loud. He wanted to ask many questions and just couldn't sort which. "But… I…" he bit his lower lip not able to find something to say.

"Thought that you were done with imprisoning me?" I said joking in an arrogant tone, but he took it to heart.

"Do you feel imprisoned?"

"Don't I?"

"You are my guest."

The last sentence came with a little hint of hurt in his voice, and I couldn't keep my arrogant tone or the jester face, I touched his chin, tilting it to face me, saying softly, "For what I know, guests can leave whenever they want."

"You can. It's just... until last night you barely could walk." He touched his wrist absently, unconsciously rounding the marks. "The door is unlocked, not that it should be an obstacle if you really wanted to go." He stood taking the tray out the bed to put back at the bench and get back, standing in front of me, his hand came to take one of mine, his fingers drawing circles on the palm. Had some uncertainties, but was his feelings about me that were filling all our surrounding, enveloping me like a nice and warm blanket. "Do you want to go?"

I couldn't help but pull him between my thighs and down to kiss him fiercely.

"I should want to." Shit.

...

* * *

 _Diana Lua_

 _Diana C. Figueiredo_

 _Written in: May, Jun/2016 and Apr/2017 - Published: Jun/01/2017_

 _Beta Reader: Cylina Nightshade (May/2017)_

 _Last change: Jun/01/2017_

* * *

 ** _Notes:_**

 _[12] If someone missed it, Duo explains it in the 5th chapter for Heero. It is a power that made the humans trust with no reason at all. I can add now that it's a power that just angels and dragons have. Also, dragons have an opposite power, that null the angel blinding._

* * *

 _# I've been working really much, no strength (or eyes) to write, after spending so much time at the computer... But, I had this part ready and I thought that would be better update it than nothing..._  
 _The part about Duo's past, I'm afraid, was all in the other half, so sorry!_  
 _The SoloxDuo's side story also will come with the other half (because it's too big to be a one-shot will be divided into small chapters according to the alternating POV's)!_

 _# I'm very grateful for all the help, **Cylina**! Thanks! ^_^_

 _#_ _Thank you very much_ rhystepeshhellkiteprince, Shenlong, Sak Hokuto-chan, Marl Paz, Kyu Redwolf and The Yaoi Pimpette _for the reviews, I loved them! And special thanks for_ Io _, that I couldn't answer but I loved to know that you liked and have fun with. ^_^_

 _ **I will work hard to finish quickly the rest, I promise! So, be kind and review me...**_


	10. Sentenced (continuation)

_\- This part is kind of very special to me. Really hope that you enjoy it!_

 **Warning:** Angst.

* * *

 _"Do you want to go?"_

 _"I should want to."_

* * *

 **Where my demons hide**

 **07\. Sentenced** (continuation)

These sensations were making me so confused, tearing me apart; that human had just broken my barriers so easily, he had melted the heart I thought to be frozen. I could put the blame on the demon that left me injured, on that green shit that almost get me killed, but it wasn't all true. This man... had looked at me differently. He really had looked at me, and he had cared; for so long I hadn't had someone that cared about me, and I had been missing the damn thing without knowing.

He fell into the kiss, hands burying in my hair, tongue dueling with mine, until he was breathless. I whirled his body and pushed him down on the mattress, on his back and just laid over him, finding that place between shoulder and chest that was just the perfect fit for my head. He relaxed under me, his arm reaching behind my wings, caressing the skin at the small of my back.

My fingers found the neckband of his shirt, pulling it enough that I could see the marks that my fangs had left; they were clean of the blood, the scab still a dark red shade surrounded by dark skin. There was also the bruises of my grabbing from the day before, they were all darkened now.

"I told you… it's ok." His voice was soft and the fact that he really wasn't troubled just made me feel guiltier. "Later I can ask for…" he stopped suddenly, unsure of something, "Shouldn't I? Was there some… risk from using that thing?"

I rose on my elbows looking at him; although I didn't feel comfortable with 'that' kind of presence so near, there was nothing wrong with the healing method.

"No." He stared at me an eyebrow raised, I could see his eyes asking me. "It's just tears."

"Tears? You mean… his tears?" His eyes were wide and I just anticipated a lot of other questions.

"Angel's tears can heal small injuries and wounds. Tears come from the soul and have this… power toward humans. So, it was…" I wouldn't admit that it was actually clever, "interesting the idea of keeping them in a bottle."

"Can heal angels too?"

"No, if an angel couldn't heal itself… well, it's because the injury was pretty bad and he already expended almost all of his grace's energy… so tears have no use at all… there are a few angel healers that can be called in extreme situations. But, if it's possible, the injured angel would just rest until gaining back some energy to take care of it by himself."

He chewed on that thought, building all sorts of questions, but he limited it just to point that I knew a lot about angels.

"Will you let that 'healer' stay in your castle?"

"I…" he wasn't sure, probably hadn't thought about it yet. "Do you want me to send him away?" I knew he would do it if I said yes, even not knowing exactly what the blond's connection was with his 'friend' yet. That made the hole in my heart bigger, reminding me of a time that I had someone that also wouldn't deny me anything.

"I suppose there is no need, once I'm the one who is leaving…"

He looked away, trying very hard not be pushy about my departure, but was all over his manners that he wanted to ask me to stay.

"Do you... hate all angels?" he asked, choosing to change the topic, unfortunately not for a easy one.

"I'm a demon…"

"Is that the only reason?"

I didn't answer, probably didn't need to, he was smart and was interested enough to see in my eyes that there was more. He brushed his lips against mine, "I wish you'd tell me more about yourself..."

"Why?" I blurted and regretted immediately.

"You told me to not fight against… my feelings." He took my hand placing it over his heart, its beating easily being felt on my palm. "But you're still… refusing it. Why not let me help you? Let me give you… this..." My own heart raced, matching his beat.

I felt his wishful feelings and just didn't know how to deal with them. The only thing that crossed my mind was to bring him closer, which I did, burying my face in his shirt.

I wanted to feel his skin, his warmth, not the harshness of the wool fabric, and I pulled it up by the hem, just to have my eyes drawn by purple bruises, still darkening, molded to the exactly positions of my fingers on his waist.

"It's nothing…"

These probably would be all dark by the next day. I hadn't noticed it before, but then the accusation that impertinent Chinese man had made earlier made sense; he had seen them, added to the ones on his neck and the blood from the bite.

"You should have said something. I didn't mean hurt you."

"I know." He was a bit embarrassed when he said, "I didn't really notice or... care at the moment."

His acceptance, his trusting, warmed me. I kissed his neck softly, letting his feelings float all around us, caressing me. I should want to go, but just didn't know how to change what was already going on inside me. Everything that I had turned myself into in those last centuries was turning upside down.

I let my hand caress the marks on his waist, whispering, "I may just not be used to holding human bodies…"

"Well, I can help with that…" his voice was low, with some embarrassment, when he tilted my head to find my lips with his own. We kissed again, he was gentle and yet demanding, like pouring all he had been feeling into it, and this time, I fell into the kiss, fell for his passion.

We broke apart with a wet sound; his lips remained near, ghosting over my face. What I read in his feelings just confirmed that I was really fucking raising his hopes and that tore me more.

I rose up and straddled his hips holding him down on the mattress. "Heero…" I started, but needed to stop, not really knowing how to say that there wasn't any chance for… us, that there wasn't any chance for me. "I… I'm a broken tool; I have no use; I keep living just because of an ancient promise… there is no meaning in my life anymore…" he tried to open his mouth, but I stopped him with my claws, feeling too raw at that moment. "I was numb, my world, these lasts centuries, was in shades of grey… I haven't being living, just existing." I let go of his arms to rub my own face. "I even hadn't noticed it until… until you." I looked in his deep blue eyes, saying it the straightest way I could, "I'm nothing. I have nothing to offer."

His expression was hurt, but his sadness was directed at me. "Don't say that… that can't be true, this isn't true." He rose up, his arms strongly enveloping my waist, his face burying in my collarbone. "I'm not asking for anything… I just want to be with you."

I kissed the top of his head, grabbing his damp hair to tilt his head, making him face me. "I'm sorry… we can't…"

His eyes were wet and hurt, locked on mine, a lot of things mixed inside. If he found the words, he bit them back and remained in silence.

"I don't want to hurt you…" I said, my voice ragged, and I let my fingers trace the curve of his jaw until his neck. He could be injured so easily, I didn't want to even think it...

"You didn't really hurt me."

"It's not…" I didn't know if I should explain, maybe it would be safer not to. "I don't want you to be hurt because of me. You have no idea, at all, about what kind of thing you are getting into… "

"Then explain it to me, so I can decide…"

"Even if I explained, it would not really be up to you to decide." I looked at him serious and a bit irritated. "That annoying black haired man has his reasons, you should listen him; you can't truly make a decision when you are too far away to be able to handle it." I saw the frown on his forehead "And I would be mean and heartless if I let you do this."

"I thought being mean and heartless were demons' characteristics…"

I wanted to laugh. Yeah right, I shouldn't care, but I did. Was too late already. The only thing that I wanted was for him to hold me, kiss me, and still let me see the feelings that made me feel so cherished. But the odds… the odds were against us.

I truly cared about hurting him, about him being hurt because of me. The only way to prevent that was to let go. I knew he understood that on some level, but he still… wanted me, in part because I had incited that.

I felt disarmed and stripped bare, lost on more levels than I could bear. He had every right to want to know, every right to try love me. It was just me hiding and running like I was so used to do. But because there wasn't another way. I couldn't… not again.

"Duo…" the stirring of his warm breath over my lips, the intensity of his deep blue eyes making me dizzy, when his voice was soft and cautiously asking, "... who is Solo?"

I froze, confused and shocked for an instant. "Where…?" my voice cracked and I needed to gather it back to ask, "Where did you hear that name?"

"You…" he said low, but quickly, like not letting me have doubts, probably worried with the horrified expression stamped on my face. "Yesterday afternoon, when you were sleeping. You were dreaming and whispered it…"

I bit my lip and let my body fall aside, forgetting that damn wing and flinching when the pain hit me. He leaned over me, his lips kissing very lightly along the line of my jaw, his fingers lingering down and up on my arm.

"My brother…" I whispered, closing my eyes.

His other hand tenderly brushed my bangs off my face. "The way you said it… didn't sound like a brother's name…" I open my eyes, sure there was too much sadness shown in them because I felt his regret rising considerably. "You don't need…" but it was just words, he truly wanted to know.

I pulled him on his back and squirmed to lay over him, finding that shelter inside his arms.

"My keeper, my brother, my friend... best friend, actually… probably my only true friend…" I needed to take a deep breath before added the last one, "and my lover."

Even though he had been waiting for me to say something like that, I felt his body getting tense. I raised my head to look at him, to find the concern clear in his eyes.

"I was different from the others in our 'family'; the only one that wasn't made to be a soldier. No one ever understood me, no one but him actually tried. He used to spend all of his free time with me, he was always taking care of me… And I just fell in love… I was in love with him for a very long time."

I buried my face in his chest, feeling again those damn tears that were hunting me all morning; I fought, not being able to let them win yet, not yet.

"You still…?"

I felt the words vibrating through his chest more than heard it. I felt the need to look into his eyes, to shake my head denying, "He is only old memories now. Old memories and one promise."

He held my hand on his face, leaning into it. "I'm sorry."

"Not as much as I."

I leaned over again, placing my ear in the middle of his chest, hearing the steady beating of his heart, the reassuring up and down of his breath.

"Why did he…" he started, but changed his mind. "What kind of promise exactly was it?"

"The things I've done… you have no idea." I breathed and tried to relax against him, feeling his hand stroking my hair. "There was a time when everything became too... harsh for me. I didn't want to do it anymore, the missions that we had were eating me alive, there was a dark hole inside me and I was silent drowning in it. I don't think the others had noticed. I wanted to give up, but that was the only life I knew; how to say that I didn't want to do anymore what I was made to do?"

"Solo noticed that something was wrong. He didn't know how to help me and I wasn't sure about asking him for what I needed. So, I tried to be strong, tried to hold on, but having mission after mission, the type I hate most, even if I had time for my body to recover, there wasn't enough for my mind, my soul. In one mission, suddenly, everything just became too much to bear; that black thing inside me became too big to ignore. I just didn't want… to exists any longer."

"I confess, I didn't think about anything in the moment, I just let that feeling consume me. He was very perceptive, and noticed that something wasn't right; he almost got himself killed to save me from myself. When I recovered some consciousness, I thought he was dead, so broken and injured he was; I almost went berserk."

I closed my eyes for a minute, enjoying the heat of his skin against mine. I was chilly and Heero's arms clenched around me anchoring. If he noticed that I was cold or just that I needed some… reassurance, I was too overwhelmed to figure out, I just grabbed what he was offering without thinking.

"Was after that, he made me promise that I would never again give up my life. I was so at the edge of my own endurance… between so many rules, so many restrictions imposed; I just needed something good, strong to fill my senses… Something that could bring some light, some hope and some love to my scattered, ruined soul. He wouldn't deny me anything and let me, finally, know how he felt about me."

I just let him hold me for a long time, leaning over his chest, trying not to squeeze him too much, I didn't think that I could tell him how much I needed him at that moment, even if I had tried. He stayed still, probably waiting for me to continue, and when I didn't, he asked very softly, "Did you ever try to read his feelings?"

"If it was possible I would have, but as a soldier, an elite one, they are trained to shut the feelings and emotions down, so he needed to let me know properly."

"He must have loved you for long too." It was a firm statement and I raised my face to look at him, a question very clear in my face; there was so much warm in his eyes when he brushed his fingers along the side of my face. "If he saw the same I see, there was no possible way to not fall for you."

I leaned into his touch with a sad smile, that burning of tears daring at the edges of my eyes again; I needed to close them. "You don't even know what you are looking at, Heero." I felt the hint of a shiver on the base of my spine, somehow he noticed and pulled me near. It caught me by surprise making my breathing lose rhythm, but his feelings were so solidly enveloping me and I surrendered, trembling with my hands clenched on his shoulders.

"I'm trying to..." he whispered. There were many questions across his face, but he was looking at me so tenderly, like it didn't really matter if they were even answered.

"Why?"

His smile was a mirror of my mischievous one the times he had answered me something that appeared pretty obvious. However, even I could read his feelings, and was aware of how he felt about me, shit, even his friends were aware of that, I still could not understand how it turned that way in the first place.

"I... really don't know… I saw your eyes, they shine so bright, even though there was so much pain, so much sadness in them. It hit me; how could a demon possibly be that sad? How could amazing eyes like that be in so much pain? I wanted to…"

"Fix me?"

He wondered, like tasting the word in his tongue. "No… It wasn't that. I... wanted to make you smile, see your light without the shadow in front, wanted to make you feel well enough so that the pain not be so visible, so strong… It was like an urge to reach out to you; sounds pretty silly, but it was some kind of protectiveness. Duo, I just want to take care of you..."

Overwhelmed, I turned my face, incapable of looking at him anymore. I had forgotten how it was feeling cared for like that; I knew I was fading away. I actually couldn't believe that he have seen any light, because I was pretty sure that all inside me was thick and dark like the demon blood running in my veins. I thought blocking all memories, good and bad, would block the pain too... I was so damn wrong.

He pulled my chin to look at him again, probably to kiss me, but when I opened my eyes, my sight was all blurred by the fucking tears. He was surprised and also a little pleased, I could tell. I blinked and one finally escaped out of my control, running down my cheeks, burning my skin along the way.

"Shit," he said, his fingers rushing to catch it, stopping it half way. He opened his mouth, but nothing come out.

I took his hand and lead it to his bruised neck. "Don't waste it." And rubbed there to heal some bruises.

"Angel…" he whispered kind of enthralled.

Hell, what I could say? Just nod and bent my neck in a way that the others just drop directly in his palms, keeping my skin from being burned, even though my lower eyelid would anyway. I had fought it so long, but at that moment I had no will to continue to fight against it, and it would be fine if at least I could heal his wounds.

He looked at it, seeing the warm soft light brightening inside. "Quatre's had a blue glow…"

"I was a different kind…"

He used them, letting it heal the bite marks and the rest of his bruises, leaving just the two white round scars in his neck. I was kind of relieved seeing it, and surprisingly, I wasn't that annoyed at letting him know what I had been before.

Heero brought his fingers back to my face, brushing the burnt line that the first tear had left. "Sorry… It's because you are a demon now?" I shrugged and he pulled me to linger his lips over my eyes. "A demon with a bright soul."

"There is no light, no bright in me. My shattered soul is a deep black hole… Heero I-"

"This... Solo... did he hurt you?" His gaze was heavy when he interrupted me and I lost the line of what I was about to say.

"He could never hurt me; he would die a thousand times before; he would go against everyone and everything to protect me. I was the one that hurt him at the end." I withdrew burying my face in his neck, just wanting to be immerse in his warm care. He thought that his protectiveness feelings were silly because I was much stronger than him, but it wasn't about the physical protection, never had been.

"Tell me what happened?"

I clutched at his shoulders, swallowing hard, his tone was just tender, soft, asking me to tell him what I had never told to anyone before.

For some reason, at that very moment I wanted to.

Not because I wanted him to know, maybe more because I had been carrying that for so long… suddenly I felt the need to spit it out, maybe saying it out loud could release a bit of the guilt I carry alone.

"You know that angels are all brothers and sisters, then having physical relations is… forbidden between us. Despite that rule, is kind common it to happen; if it was kept low everyone just turn a blind eye. After what had happened, with what I had inside me, I didn't care. I loved and wanted him, I needed all of him, not just his brotherhood. For me it never could feel bad, wrong or dirty, it was just love, the way of physically expressing love."

"We kept it as a secret. I was too naive. It never had crossed my mind that someone would be… pissed about us. I don't know what really happened, we had a peaceful time after the dragons were made and placed on Earth to protect the humans from the demons. Maybe we just became careless and someone noticed." I tasted bitterness on my tongue, like a physical reminder of that betrayal, I never could swallow it really.

"The others from our family set up to catch us together…" I felt my hands fisting and obliged them to stop. His lips found my forehead and rested there, fingers absently smoothing the locks of my hair. I squeezed my eyes shut, forcing the sight of that moment down, back to the most deep and dark corner of my soul. "Everything became confused. They were so angry and hurt, betrayed; I couldn't understand that, they were our family, and we were the ones that should feel betrayed."

"Angels are arrogant, egoistic pieces of shit. You couldn't have called that a trial. He was older than me and had some _fame_ … he was condemned for harassing me and dirtying me. Defiled was the word they used in his sentence. Like he was all and the only one responsible for making me step out of god's grace. Like that meant shit truly, didn't have anyone there that was innocent of lust sins."

"I tried, tried so hard to explain… that it was mutual, that I held the same parcel of guilt as him. But no one listened to me, they were irritated because I didn't just accuse him." I rose, almost feeling suffocated from the pain, like my throat was being crushed.

"They were sticking to the idea that he had corrupted me. They said that my virtue needed to be cleansed. I couldn't understand and, at the end, I was sentenced to be punished and he was sentenced to death."

I felt like drowning, incapable of dragging enough air inside my lungs. My heart attempting to explode through my chest; Heero's arms around me were the only anchor that I had. I tried to focus in his breathing on the back of my neck, the warmth of his chest on my back, the sweet nothings that he was saying trying to comfort me.

I felt like a rag doll and let him maneuver me, to pull me between his legs, holding and lulling me. It was the concern in his eyes that let me know that I was shedding tears again. My heart and my soul was aching so badly that I even felt the fucking burning on my face. I had to put serious concentration into not let myself fall in that hole, concentration in the tenderness of his voice, the heat of his hands rubbing along my spine.

"I wasn't allowed to say goodbye… to say that I loved him… that I didn't want it happen…"

"He knew it. I'm sure he knew…" He kissed my tears, trying to dry them, and then swallow my sobs kissing me deeply and thoroughly.

I still didn't know how he could love me. Maybe because he knew so little about me. Maybe because he couldn't really see that the demon body that I have now was just a reflection of what my soul was much before. Maybe I never understood how Solo could have loved me in the first place. How somehow I could ever be loved, having done what I did.

Suddenly, a thought just kicked in without any consideration: that I couldn't stay with him. There was no way I could be with Heero, I would end up just hurting and losing him. My free wing just moved by itself to envelop him, to envelop us, when I felt just hopeless, without knowing what the fuck I was doing in this fucking world.

I was just falling apart, I needed him, I needed his care so much and because of that I just needed, really needed to go. It was too much… truly too much… and I let the storm break and cried out loud, trying to muffle the sounds and sobs on his skin, in a last attempt to hold some strand of dignity, I sobbed and trembled and held on to him for dear life.

My face was hurting like hell, all burned by the damned tears, but compared to facing the pain in my soul it was nothing. I shouldn't be alive, if I had never been brought to life it would have spared so much pain, innocent pain... I had hurt even the most dearest to me, I couldn't bear to hurt Heero too.

"Don't let me hurt you…" I heard my voice saying, and was so low and hurt that I wasn't sure if he had.

However, his arms tightened around me, strong and nice. "I won't…" and even I knew it was a sweet lie, that he had no power to prevent it, I wanted to believe. "Don't let me hurt you…" I repeated, knowing that I just needed to let him go, to go away to help with that, but in that very moment, I just wanted to stay with him holding me tight that way. I cried like I never had cried in centuries, I was cold and he pulled the blanket around us. Somehow I slept in pure exhaustion, surrounded by his love and his care.

" _I need to let you go"_

 _(TBC…)_

* * *

 _Diana Lua_

 _Diana C. Figueiredo_

 _Written in: May, Jun/2016 and Apr/2017 - Published: Jul/09/2017_

 _Beta Reader: Cylina Nightshade (Jul/2017)_

 _Last change: Jul_ _/09/2017_

* * *

# _The flow of all those little revelations in the conversation was just possible because of the patience and help that **Marl Paz** gives to me. Love you! :)_

 _# **Cylina** you are amazing, you made this chapter become really good, thanks a lot!  
_

 _#_ _Thank you very much_ Marl Paz, Io and The Yaoi Pimpette _for the reviews, I loved them!_

 _# It was not was ready quickly how I wanted, but I'm really happy with the final result. Like I said this one is very special to me. 'Cause I'm recovering from a three-year depression, Duo's feelings hit me too close to heart and was very harsh to work in it. But I'm glad that I managed and that I found the final result very good. Despite the angst side, hope you all enjoyed it too._

 _# N_ _ext Sunday will be my birthday and feedback would be a lovely present. ^_~_

 _# There is a side story, with a bit about Duo's past with Solo, the name is **Ónoma** , you can find it in my profile if was interested to know how they become lovers and start using other names that were not their given angel names._

 _# I'm afraid that next chapter will take a while, sorry. But will have a lemon there, Heero x Duo this time!_

 ** _So, liked finding of Duo's past?  
I will be waiting for some birthday's presents! :)_**


	11. Flying

_\- When I told that this one would take a while, I swear, I didn't think that would be that long while... sorry!_

 _\- Again, it's half chapter, but the rest was almost done and will come soon..._

 _\- So many hugs and thanks to **SFA** that helped get this conversation on the right track and_ _**Cylina Nightshade** for the help with English! ^_^_

* * *

 **Where my demons hide**

 **08\. Flying**

 _(Heero's POV)_

" _When the curtain's call_

 _Is the last of all_

 _When the lights fade out_

 _All the sinners crawl"_

'Don't let me hurt you.' Duo had said and repeated many times, his voice so full of guilt. All I could do was comfort him. Despite his warm body, he appeared to be cold even with the blanket wrapped around him. I whispered things that I didn't know just to try to mend that sorrow, I wasn't even sure if he was listening, so lost in his inner vortex of pain. He ended up resting on my thigh, quivering while he cried until he fell asleep emotionally exhausted.

I kept caressing his hair, just looking at the way the strands ran between my fingers, the way it looked so brown and, yet, had subtle shades in gold and red. His face was buried in my pants, but I could see part of it frowning in pain, with so many marks from burns. That tore me apart. And not even the weight of Duo's head on my thigh was bothering me as much as it should have.

That outburst of his served just to make me see how selfish I have been. On one hand, I wanted so much to know more, have more time with him... The truth, like he said, was that I have no idea at all what he bore all of his life. I have no right to ask him to stay. It's not right to keep him without his power.

I had thought that he was an angel from the beginning; his appearance didn't leave much room to doubt that. That meant he had been living for a length of time unfathomable to me. And it was just silly of me thinking that I could understand even a bit of him. He was kind of a giant puzzle and, even if I could figure out one piece or two, there were infinite others to go.

I could expend my entire life trying to know him, still, I knew it would never be enough. Actually, it would be ridiculous, one human lifetime would be nothing more than a blink of an eye to him. Yet, I still wished there was some way that I could convince him to give me the chance to try.

However, he was so terrified of hurting me in some way, so afraid of being too much danger for me that I doubt that I would be capable of doing it. I wondered what he was hiding, what he was running from, what could be so implacable for him. I wished I could ask what had happened, what he had done to make him feel so oppressed by guilt. He said that he had hurt that Solo at the end… I'm not sure in which manner. And certain, like the sun rises every day, he will go away. I wish, at least, he could tell me why, but I couldn't ask that, it would be forcing too much. I just wanted to help him, and I knew that touching the issues about his past could very well just hurt him more. For me, now, there was only one way to help him, the way I was still refusing, because it was so damn difficult.

Carefully I moved him, replacing my thighs for an actual pillow, made sure that he was covered and the fire was high, so he wouldn't feel cold. After the day that I found him poisoned, dying, I couldn't help but not want to leave him alone, afraid of something happening. I was weak and hungry, head heavy and feet wobbly. I needed to put some order in my thoughts, I had so much to do and I should get some strength back on me. I'd been neglecting my duties, thinking of nothing more than him.

My first stop was in my chamber, I was better after a hot bath and clean clothes. It was a shocking surprise to find the cut in my thigh was almost healed, leaving just a fine line scar, a bit large at the entrance of sword; even through the fabric his tears had healed, it was a lot of tears. After the hot meal, that I asked to be brought up there to me, I was almost feeling well enough to face the others.

I didn't understand much about other supernatural beings that were not demons; they were the only ones real in my life. Angels aren't reality in anyplace on Earth, I always was sure that they didn't give a damn about us. As for dragons, none had been seen in our country, neither for miles around. Just because humans were greedy.

It's not known exactly when, but once the humans had discovered that dragon parts could make a good profit, they started hunting and killing them all around the world. So, even though it was said that they were made to love and protect humans, the entire species turned their back on humanity. In some places in the world that still have clans, and even without actually helping the humans, their presence was enough to keep demons away.

The last dragon clan around my region was decimated about fifty years before I was born. So yeah, we were pretty much vulnerable to demon attacks and had learned how to deal with them. Therefore, being a demon hunter was one of the most required skills, normally restricted to mercenaries, but I couldn't help but handle things with my own hands, especially after the accident that had resulted in my whole family and many of my underlings being slain ten years ago.

I needed to climb down the stairs slowly, feeling the weakness of the blood loss in my trembling limbs and not wanting to show it. I pushed open the library doors to find Wufei there, sitting on the massive handle notched table near the fireplace. He was examining some papers, probably the reports of our last trip that I just had left aside for all those days.

He lifted those dark eyes, staring hard, scrutinizing all of me. His expression was divided between relief and bafflement. "Good to see that you are still in one piece."

I glared at him, but he never was affected by my death scowls anyway, and I just get near, seeing the papers spread around the table. In the end, I was just feeling grateful for having him there, taking care of things for me. My head was too mired down with all those things involving Duo… but that state wouldn't last long, probably after his leave I would be able to get back to my daily chores, at least I was hoping so.

"So…" he started, trying to find some conversation topic, as I said nothing, his eyes still locked on me. "The healer came back."

"What?" I asked blinking at him in confusion.

"Your wounds," he made a gesture pointing at my neck, "I saw how it was earlier in the morning…" I couldn't stop the slight blushing of my face, I wasn't sure what he had seen, I had woken with the voices in the bathroom and of course, I saw the blade hurled in the wall, but I had forgotten after all that talk with Duo. "I tried to find him, but he was out... something about herbs in the woods again." He continued, ignoring my embarrassment.

"This…" I wasn't sure if I wanted to explain to him about the tears or even if I should reveal things like that about Duo, but then an alarm sounded in my mind. "Barton... you know if he was with him?"

"No. Apparently Barton was the reason for him going to find those herbs, he was resting in his room, ill or something…"

I arched an eyebrow suspiciously. Barton had never been sick in the many years I had known him. "So… you haven't spoken with anyone since yesterday?" He looked confused at me but confirmed. "Then you don't know about the healer…" I stated, making him curious. Before he could start asking, I went to the doors, calling for a servant and ordering him to bring Trowa here.

When I turned back, Wufei was standing, arms crossed in front of his chest waiting for me explain. I sighed and started telling him what had happened when I took the healer to see Duo.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" He was truly surprised, his face almost showing disbelief, as if he didn't know me well enough to know that I wouldn't make up something like that. Suddenly, and strangely, his behavior changed, just appearing to be mildly annoyed, actually sad would fit better. I didn't have the smallest hint why. Wufei tilted his head, closing his eyes and rubbing hands against them. "I can't believe that now we have two of those… inhuman beings here. Wait…" he interrupted his own thought startled "You didn't see Barton after he left with-"

"I'm here…" The strong voice came from the door, sounding exhausted, "my Lord."

Trowa normally didn't use much formality between just us. Something appeared to be wrong with him, it was apparent even in the way he moved, walking over to a chair in front the fireplace, seating himself there heavily, throwing his head back like it was too much weight to carry. His skin was pale, with dark circles under his eyes. I had never seen him like that.

"You look like shit…" Wufei said acidly, with his usual lack of tact, mending slightly adding, "Are you really sick?"

"Not exactly… It's... complicated."

"Well, you can start by explaining what a wingless angel could want from you," Wufei's impatience made him say sarcastically.

"He… I…" Trowa struggled with the words and his green eyes found mine, completely lost. However, I felt just as adrift not having any idea how to help. "He wanted me, he has been looking for me."

"I thought that you didn't know each other." Wufei looked suspicious.

"We don't... well…" he sighed, giving up on trying to find the right words to say, "we've never met… in this life."

We stare at him, but no words come to my mouth, nor Wufei's. What in the hell was Trowa talking about? There aren't such things like past lives… or are there?

"It's too confusing… I'm not able to cope with everything that is swirling around in my head now… These memories... these feelings... it's too mixed up inside me. I'm not sure which are from now and which were from... before." He braced his head, covering his face with hands, his long bangs making a curtain that didn't allow us to see his obvious misery.

"Trowa…" I started carefully, keeping my voice a calm, intimate tone. "Are you saying that you lived a life before this?"

He nodded without raising his head. I was shocked. With everything that had happened recently, it's almost scary discovering that I knew nothing about the world. Still, Chang was more skeptical.

"He could just fake that for… some reason."

I bet Wufei couldn't imagine one single reason, as I couldn't, and despite that, "Apparently, angels can't lie…" I clarified, making Wufei give me questioning look.

"He didn't tell me anything, he... made me remember." Trowa said, his words very low, especially the last one.

It took me a while until I found words, "So, you have memories for… a past life?" That was surreal, I could never imagine that I would have been posing such a question.

Trowa finally lifted his head facing us and had a small sarcastic smile, like he himself didn't believe what he was about to tell us. "Five past lives, actually."

Chang fell back in the chair that he had vacated only moments earlier, showing all of his incredulity. "This…"

"Yeah… I know… it's bizarre! I'm feeling like I've gone insane, with all those things inside my mind now, it's as if my head will explode if I try to order things… I can't really build a timeline… and I…" he wearily wiped a hand down his face, a strong frown wrinkling his forehead, "Quatre said to not try too hard, with time things will settle and I will be able to manage this… but for now... it's making me mad."

A strong silence hung heavily in the air after that confession, the only sound was the wood crepitating on fire. The air was tense and full of questions. No one knew where to start.

"How would that be possible? I've never heard anything about… reincarnation…" Chang was the first to break the oppressive stillness that had settled over us.

"I'm not sure, it's related to his wings. But after I recovered the memories, I was so overwhelmed and confused… and he was just so… clingy, wanting desperately to be near me. He kept telling me that he missed me, that he loves me, I couldn't deal with it. I needed space, I needed room to breathe and we ended up arguing, he left and I couldn't organize the memories inside my head to find the answers by myself."

I bit my bottom lip, almost forgetting about my own issues. after all, what Trowa was telling us sounded far too surreal. "So you were… are involved?"

He stared at me, his emerald gaze burning. "How am I supposed to answer that? I met him yesterday! And now... I have all those thoughts and feelings inside me… memories of us… and… my body is kind of drawn to him… but, but it's not me… at least not the actual me… I can't… I can't handle this… he said… said that we are soulmates, I don't know what that means… I just…"

Trowa stopped with a heavy sounding groan and just leaned back in the chair totally frustrated. Before any of us could continue, there was a firm knock at the door. I was the closest to it and move to open it, not at all surprised to find the small blond there, the servants wouldn't dare disturb us in here.

"The servants said that Trowa was here." His voice was calm, but carried a hint of demand to it. He was holding a mug with some sort of hot tea. Without much thought, I just stepped back and let him enter. Just when I saw the discontented look in Trowa's expression, what Duo had said about the 'blinding' thing sprung back into my mind.

"I assume that you want to stay in my castle." I spoke out and he turned to me confused by that sudden topic. "My only condition is that you stop using this 'blinding' on us."

His eyes narrowed in annoyance right away, clearly showing a barely subdued rage. And when he replied his voice was icy and dripping with disdain, "I suppose it was that… _hybrid creature_ that told you about this."

My hands clenched into fists. I didn't care for his contemptuous tone, nor the words he used to refer to Duo.

"What is this?" Chang demanded.

The blond didn't turn to him, instead, kept his cool cerulean gaze focused on me, one eyebrow raised as if daring _me_ to explain.

"It would seem that angels have a power capable of making humans trust them blindly." I answered, confronting those haughty clear blue eyes and the challenge I found therein.

"Have you been using this power?" Trowa's voice caused the expression on the blond's face to shift immediately to one of guilt. He turned to face the brunette, biting his bottom lip hard and walking the few steps between them. Carefully he sank down to one knee and modestly extended the steaming mug.

"This will help… you need to relax and rest, you will feel better after some days resting." His voice was low, almost tender. A stark contrast to how he had addressed me not half a minute earlier.

Trowa accepted the offered concoction, but he kept a stern gaze on the one who claimed to be his soulmate. And if I dared to guess, there was hurt lingering there as well, just under the surface. "Have you been using this 'blinding' thing on me?"

The question hung in the air, heavy with accusation and distrust. Making the angel take on a defensive posture. "It's not something bad…" Came the wary response. "It just serves to make things easier…"

"Easier for whom?" Chang's terse voice interrupted and I watched as the angel's back stiffened at the brusque outside inquiry.

"Did you?" Trowa asked again, seriously, and Quatre seemed to almost wilt in resignation, nodding. "How does this power work exactly?"

"Angels from third heaven _[13]_ have this ability. It's designed to help us with doing the…" He paused as if calculating the appropriate words to explain. "...chores that were related to humans. It just makes you accept things that we say and simply trust us."

I saw the muscles twitch in Trowa's jaw as he clenched his teeth. Which I knew was a form of his calm personality showing when he was really pissed off about something.

"Promise!" I demanded, voice firm as I chose to intervene before a fight broke out. If I had pieced things together correctly, there was something about angels, some force that made promises and lies a very strong issue for them. And if the look that I received from the blond was anything to measure by, I was right. "Promise me now that you won't use this on us again and only then I will allow you to stay."

He hesitated for a minute, looking at me the aquamarine eyes filled with an almost uncontrolled fury. Truth be told, even though he hadn't shown anything that didn't fit his human cover, I was sure that even without wings he still had angelic strength. So it was not as though I could force him to depart or stay with my words. However, the obvious feelings that he had toward Trowa made him swallow his pride and do things just to gain Trowa's praise.

"Whatever. I promise," he acquiesced, his voice laced with bitterness. "Did you make that _despicable pariah_ promise this too?"

"Didn't need to, _he_ is leaving…" I didn't know if Duo had this power too or not. But I doubted that he had used it. Although, perhaps I simply couldn't notice, because I probably would never have realized that Quatre was using it if Duo hadn't told me.

Chang turned to me, crossing his arms, and I could tell that he had questions about Duo, but the time wasn't right and I glared at him. He rolled his eyes, but nodded in acknowledgment and turned to the blond again. "How does this thing... this _bond_ or whatever it is between you and Barton work?"

"Why should I answer that?"

"Because they are my family," Trowa cut in abruptly. "And because _I_ want to understand…"

"I rather want you to rest first, after... it will be easier to comprehend." The tenderness was back in the angel's voice as his face once again took on a more concerned expression.

"I can't rest with this storm of doubts in my mind."

The angel rose to his feet and pulled a chair closer for himself, in front of Trowa. He brushed the fine, wispy bangs away from his face in an anxious gesture, before starting, "My wings are the price I paid to have a 'ring' placed on you. It has a spell cast with a piece of my soul, so that we are bonded to each other. The ring serves as a barrier, protecting you when you are living, and when you die it makes your soul turn back to Earth instead of getting mixed in the veil and becoming part of the universe's energy…"

Trowa looked at him with an expression that was indecipherable, then he closed his eyes, pressing his temples with his hands. I wondered vaguely if that bit of information was making him be assaulted by some sort of memories. Quatre extended his arm toward him, but retracted it before touching, pain and suffering written on his angelic face.

"Why didn't you come find him before?" I asked and didn't know if it was my low tone or if the angel was simply tired of using that haughty facade. His tone was a mixture of sorrow and exhaustion.

"Of course I would if I had known. I would have come much sooner…" Trowa opened his eyes and several minutes passed as they locked gazes. I felt a bit embarrassed for the intimacy of that look, almost jealous. "I missed you." Quatre continued like was just the two of them in the room. "Literally. I missed you for two lives… I nearly lost my mind searching endlessly for you the last hundred and fifty years. When you are reborn the only clue I have is a 'push' on the stub of my wing bone, it just indicates the general direction where you are. Without my wings, I can't fly to you, I can't use my grace anymore, I'm stuck to almost only the human means to look for you. I need to search with only this small clue for the direction where you were born, I need to rely on destiny, hoping for some luck to lead me to you. It's a vast world, you have no idea what I bear all those years without finding you. When that _beast_ recognized my true nature and revealed that I was an angel, I thought it would be easier to just make you remember right away... I'm sorry if I was… If it was too sudden... I just..."

"I… I'm just too confused right now." Trowa said with a sorrowful tone. "Maybe you are right, I just need some time resting." He turned to face me, his eyes asking for permission.

"Take the time you need, my friend." Even though he was sworn as my vassal, we grew together and he was more my friend then my underling. Actually, like he had said, we are family, once we both lost ours together. "Chang is here to help me and… and _he_ is going soon, so…" I was counting on being able to dive deep in my chores and tasks to not think of him when Duo was gone.

"So you can use the right head again." Wufei couldn't lose the chance of provoking me.

"Will you return the weapon to him?" Trowa asked.

"Yes." I snap back resolute. Not giving him a chance of impeding me again, though in his actual conditions I doubt Trowa was even remotely thinking about that. He just nodded, finally taking a sip of his mug. The liquid wasn't steaming anymore and he made a bitter face while swallowing. He stood up extending a hand toward Quatre, the relief and the joy in the blond's eyes shone like a light. I had trouble reconciling these seemingly two conflicting personalities from the angel.

After they had gone I remained staring at the closed doors, thinking about the odds. There are no coincidences in this world. So, I was asking myself what the odds of, after a hundred and fifty years, them finding each other, I couldn't leave Duo aside that equation.

"Do you believe it?" Chang's voice sounded calm and low, thoughtful. "What could be this 'ring'? For sure it was nothing physical." He had his head thrown back looking at the ceiling, thoughtful. "I have never heard anything about living many lives. That sounds... interesting, to say the least."

"Sounds harsh," I countered, "Trowa wasn't exactly happy… and that part about searching the entire world?… It is a huge world… sounds very arduous to me."

"Probably not more than knowing that you will inevitably lose the one you love… and that there exists a chance of finding them again and live with him one more time. A chance of making things occur differently..."

His voice had taken on a strange, almost wistful tone that suggested a hidden longing laced through with regret. He appeared to become lost in his thoughts, the fingers of his right hand drawing something in the back of the other one while his eyes stared at the flames of fire. An unconscious gesture that was quite common when he was lost in a distant world that he had never shared with me.

"Chang… what…" He didn't look at me, his eyes fixed on the fire and I didn't have the courage to ask what he would have done different, what he would have changed. He never was talkative about his past, the topic appearing to be extremely difficult and troubling to him, not that I could fault him for his discomfort. I knew his village was burned down by a dragon, and he had lost his fiancée the day before they were to be wedded.

I walked toward the safe place, a hole in the wall behind a bookshelf and carefully removed the blanket wrapped object concealed within, bringing it over to the table, laying it atop the papers and removing the cloth covering to reveal it's contents. Chang hadn't seen the divine weapon before and it caught his attention, drawing him to examine it closer.

"So… _he_ is leaving?" He inquired while his fingers traced the shining divine metal. It surprised me the way he referred to Duo, his voice carrying an oddly casual tone, as opposed to his usual irritation and annoyance.

"He needs to…" I replied, trying to keep an indifferent tone in my voice.

"And… are you ok with this?" He pressed, concern seeping into his tone.

"Of course not." My voice came out louder and more heated than I had intended and I rushed to regain my composure. "But it's the right thing to do… there is too much about him, things that I will never know, things that I will never understand… I..."

"Even if it was the right call, it's hard, isn't it? To let go…"

Wufei had returned to gazing intently at the fire, and I had a feeling that he wasn't talking about me. "Yes… it's damn hard… but apparently there is some form of danger surrounding him, some threat, and he was very concerned about my… our safety if he remains here much longer."

"Hn." I swear I was expecting him to press for more information, rushing me to send Duo away quickly. Instead, with a husky voice, he said, "Sometimes leaving is the best thing to do."

"You can't understand… I probably will never see him again… I don't know if I can deal with this… after." I held the scythe, feeling the weight of the cold metal in my hands.

"You will. Won't be easy, but you will… " he said with a strong, melancholic determination. "I can understand better than you imagine. The truth is that we are just humans and they… there is no way we can fit in their world. Trowa's situation just proves that. To be together the angel had given up his wings, his entire life… is that fair? Not to mention the suffering when they aren't together. Maybe, just letting go and setting free the other is the best way to demonstrate our love… they are and have so much more, it's not right to bind them at our limited human life…"

"Chang… who did you let go of?" I needed to ask, it was clear that he wasn't talking about either Duo nor Quatre. He frowned, yet still didn't look at me, his right hand coming to his left shoulder and sliding down until it rested lightly against the back of his left hand, as if there was something to trace there. I hadn't seen anything on his skin but a big scar on his stomach.

"It doesn't matter… I was just a burden there. Leaving was the right thing to do..." His black eyes seemed to glow as they reflected the flames of the fire, I thought I could almost make out an unshed tear there, but it was probably just the firelight and my imagination.

"How did you… deal with it?" I asked softly.

"Not thinking about it." The response came somber.

"And that works?" I gently pressed, not buying the method seeing him the way he was in that moment.

"Has been working all these years…"

I wasn't sure if I truly believed it worked if the sadness on his face was any sort of indicator, but that explained some of things about him that had intrigued me over the years. He had never gotten involved with anyone and the way that he pushed so hard at his training and work... It was all a way to not dwell on whatever he had left. I didn't like it at all. Instinctively, my fingers tightened around the sharp weapon, as a fierce wave of concern and uncertainties washed over me.

(...)

* * *

 _Diana Lua_

 _Diana C. Figueiredo_

 _Written in: Sep and Oct/2017 - Published: Nov/13/2017_

 _Beta reader: SFA (Oct/17) and Cylina Nightshade (Nov/17)_

 _Last change: Nov/13/2017_

* * *

 ** _Notes:_**

 _[13] If you didn't see explanations about the angelic hierarchy on Ónoma, here it is: "The angelic hierarchy is alike the 'nine choirs of angel' from Catholicism, divided into three classes: the God's nearest, the middle ones and the human's nearest. Each class has three or more kinds of angels." The third heaven that Quatre mentioned is the human's nearest._

* * *

 _# I'm sorry for this long delay! It was a sequence of things that kept me from writing it... first was Solo's fault because my muse wanted only work on Ónoma because of him and Duo, then I have an injury in my elbow that didn't allow me to write and at last problems with a bully neighbor... So hope you forgive me! This is half and that lemon I promise was in the other half... and it was almost all done, so hopefully won't take long to post it. I'm finishing my graduation so, with some luck after this month I will have more time and will try to keep up this delay. ^_^_

 _# Thank you very much_ RhysTalCernunnos, Io and Marl Paz for the reviews and support, hope you still on board! ^_^

 _# If someone missed it, the side story about Duo & Solo was already been posted, you can find the link for **Ónoma** in my profile. As soon I finish the other half of this chapter I will work in the five part._

 _ **So, still on board?**_


	12. Flying (continuation)

_\- Sorry about other long time to post this! And also sorry for it became so big! More explanations at the end..._

 ** _-_** _I can't thank enough to **SFA** and __**Cylina** for all help, both were short of time and yet helped me a lot with this! You guys are the best! Thank you so much!_

 **Warning:** Lemon Heero x Duo (finally ne!)

* * *

 **Where my demons hide**

 **08\. Flying** (continuation)

The sound of my slow steps echoed loudly against the cold gray stones of the empty hallway. This part of my castle had been completely deserted; I didn't know if it was the fear of what was inside one of these rooms, or if Trowa, Wufei maybe, had ordered that no one was permitted to wander here. Seeing the door, dark battered wood like all the others, made me pause, hesitating; there were plenty of empty rooms, that once had been filled with life, now haunted by the ghosts of memories and filled with longing. And this one, very soon, would be the same. Even, my hand was freezing, holding a bowl with melted snow, it was the constricting pain within my chest which was tearing me apart.

I had left the library a few hours before, leaving Chang to deal with that pile of reports, even though the sad look on his face, the resignation inside his eyes, remained very vivid in my mind. That kind of loss, even if it had been inevitable, wasn't something that you could just deal with suddenly after it happened, it was harder because you needed to deal with it beforehand, knowing it was about to happen and swallow it, tasting the incapacity of being unable to prevent it. The only thing I could do was arrange some things, trying desperately to focus on what would make the situation more bearable.

The door was unlocked and the high-pitched squeal as it opened was a piercing assault on my eardrums. It was an almost torturous moment until my eyes found Duo sound asleep on the bed, lying on his stomach, the blanket tangled around his hips and legs, his good wing relaxed and sprawled carelessly across the mattress. It would have been a sweet, calming view if not for the trails marring his otherwise perfect face, the burnt remnants of the paths his tears had taken, painting a painful picture wrought with undertones of grief and sorrow.

Trying to walk quietly made me marvel at how Trowa could always make it seem so effortless walking around without his boot heels clacking on the stone floor. Still, I managed to reach the bed without waking Duo and knelt next to it, setting the bowl aside on the floor. I carefully reached across and took a strand of hair, lifting it away from his face. Those burns should be aching like hell, only pure exhaustion could be allowing him to sleep and it was worst in the corners of his eyes, his longs eyelashes weren't enough to mask the damage. I heaved a deep and weary sigh as I crossed my arms on the mattress, burying my face between them. Those feelings I was experiencing... the desire to comfort and take care of him, were stronger than ever. Although there was nothing I could do for him besides returning his scythe, allowing him to regain his power. I rubbed my face against the bed cover feeling the abrasive texture of the humble fabric, the prickle from the dried straw inside against my cheeks. I felt both sad and lost with the knowledge that I should let him go warring with the desire to ask him to stay. I was conflicted and confused, but most of all... I felt utterly useless to him.

"Hey..." Duo's sleepy voice reached my ears while fingers pushed softly at my hair, forcing me to lift my face "What's the matter?"

Still, it was very strange that I could wake him up just by experiencing such emotions while near him. I couldn't begin to imagine what dealing with such a power must have been like for him, always seeing everyone's emotions. It should have been overwhelming. However, I had this distinct feeling that… somehow he craved or perhaps he needed to feel it, just like a person needs to breathe. At least his reactions, if I had been reading them correctly, left me with that impression as when I left my feelings bare and open it seemed to make him relaxed, more at ease, and I was not ashamed of saying that I have been using this to my own advantage.

Our eyes met and I could see the real damage that the tears had done on his lower eyelids. I rushed to get the bowl, taking the piece of cloth that was inside, wringing out any excess water and handed it to him.

"Here..."

Duo paused, taking a minute to gaze intently at me, a small inkling in his eyes, as if trying to decide if he should push the matter or let it go. He accepted the damp rag, though not without shooting me a look that spoke volumes about how he knew I was avoiding his question.

"How are you feeling?" I inquired, attempting to change the topic.

"Burnt…" his voice had a hint of sarcasm, as he let some drops of icy water fall on his burns before covering his face with the cloth. It looked like a mask, making me think, one more time, that I knew nothing about him. Even his name, 'Duo', wasn't real. I wondered how many layers he had hidden beneath the face that he had shown to me, even though he had told me that I was the closest one to him in a long time.

"Sorry to make you… remember about all that." I offered, knowing it must have been an unwelcome experience for him.

He removed the fabric from his face handing it back to me. It was a bit of shock, noticing how warm it had become, before dipping it in the watery snow again. His eyes were fixed on the ceiling, but far from actually looking at the dusty massive beams there, his attention was turned inside himself.

"I'm not…" he finally said, before covering the face again with the cold cloth, a small sigh of satisfaction escaping his lips, the next words came a bit muffled. "Thanks, for listening... I've been holding that in for far too long…" He paused to take a big intake of air, the cloth becoming plastered on his perky nose "I've never told that to anyone. Actually, I may have gone the rest of my life never having said it out loud."

That confession, as much as it warmed my heart, also twisted at my guts. It was bittersweet, the pleasant feeling of having that proof of his trust, yet knowing the depressingly sad truth that all this time he had never had someone to share the burden of that profound sorrow. "You hold too much inside of yourself…" I said unintentionally, it was just a thought prowling in my mind.

"You have no idea…" he said in a voice so low that I almost didn't hear it. I couldn't see his face, covered as it was by the wet cloth, but somehow I could tell that there must have been such a somber expression in his eyes. There was a strange feeling in the air around us and I didn't know how to remedy it.

"Thank you, for trusting me enough to share this with me."

Duo uncovered his face and handed the cloth back, tilting his head to look at me, eyes darkened in concern "You shouldn't," his voice took on a firm serious tone, "The more you know more dangerous it will become. The longer I stay…"

"I know." I cut in. "I just… I wish I could… there were too many demons inside of you…" I mumbled, averting my eyes, not sure what to do.

He chuckled softly, "I'm a demon, Heero…" his voice had that sparkle of amusement that always made me feel a bit foolish, but I knew he was just trying to alleviate the air. And his eyes were kind, looking down at me as he was, saying that he understood what I was feeling. I rose up suddenly, extended an opened hand toward him, "Come with me…"

Duo arched an eyebrow with a suspicious look. "Where?"

Instead of answering, I grabbed him by the wrist, pulling him up, insisting. He didn't fight, just came along, keeping the curious and suspicious frown while I guided the way, two floors upward.

When we reached my chamber, I finally turned to look at him and, by the look in his eyes and the ghosting of a smile on his lips, I could tell that he knew exactly what was behind the door. Actually, he should have known it the whole time.

I let go of his wrist that I was holding, my chest was filled with pain and my mind with doubts, yet I grabbed at the resolution of what is the right thing to do and opened the door stepping inside, inviting him to enter.

"I'm sorry that I didn't give it back to you right away…" I could have spared him so much trouble if I had.

"Who would?" he asked, looking at me with a warm expression of understanding. "I can't blame you for not trusting a demon… Actually, I'm kind of surprised that you're returning it to me anyway." His voice was soft, not showing any trace of irritation or resentment.

I paused for a moment, pondering how to explain that, even with the concerns of the others, deep inside it hadn't been about distrusting him, but because I didn't wish for him to depart. I didn't know how, and so I changed the subject. "Did you know... that I had it?"

"Yeah, I can feel if it's near enough… I felt it just after drinking your blood the first time. I probably was too... messed up to sense it before. How long did you have it before that?"

"Not long," I replied warily "It was brought to me that same day, shortly after I had found you almost… dying." I paused on the last word, recalling that moment in vivid detail.

He gave me a wistful look, watching me intently, his violet gaze piercing my soul, trying to read deep inside me, searching through my words. "And yet you rather offered me your blood, your life…" He prodded, his brow furrowing slightly.

"I didn't know what was the right thing to do. Even though you are a demon… I felt like I couldn't let you die. I was confused… at that time, I didn't understand what I was feeling… "

"I know," He said, finally stepping inside, with that same soothing voice, grabbing my chin and kissing me gently, very lightly, careful with the burns on his face, then spun and walked toward the bed, where the bright scythe was placed.

When his fingers found the metal, a nearly blinding green aura appeared around it. He closed his eyes and that energy increased and surrounded his whole body. I couldn't explain how it happened exactly, but the weapon changed before my eyes, turning into a fearsome reaper's blade, just like I had imagined. The snath was taller than him, the blade as long as an arm, beautifully curving and deadly sharp. The burns faded from his face, as if they had never existed to begin with.

When he opened his eyes, he did so slowly, the long eyelashes fluttering softly. His countenance took on an expression that spoke of renewed power and resolve.

With an abrupt movement, he tore the bandages from his formerly broken wing, spreading both to their full glorious length. I barely took notice of how the papers and objects around my chamber were disturbed by the wind that was generated as he experimentally flapped the appendages once, twice, thrice. A relieved look settled over his features informing me of how much he must have needed to to be able to move and stretch them. The past few days of having his wing bound as it had been had to have been difficult for him.

Whether he was a demon, shinigami or angel I could not have cared as Duo was a surreal vision bathed as he was in a vibrant green aura. I was enthralled.

The tips of the long black feathers now seemed to glimmer with that verdant energy and the whole inner side of his wings appeared to be covered in a strange and almost tribal pattern of intricate markings that were a mix of straight sharp edges and soft flowing lines, that I couldn't begin to describe or decipher as they pulsed with the energy flux.

The vision was over almost as soon as it had begun. While that bright green aura faded away and the scythe returned to its smaller compact form, that flux of energy inside his wings lingered, though it darkened considerably, turning a shade that reminded me of the deepest parts of a forest.

His demeanor changed, becoming solemn and formal as he used the tip of the blade to write in the air, leaving symbols made of that same vivid green energy, while whispering words in a language that I didn't understand. Those strange symbols formed a circle which Duo placed in the middle of it the broken chain that remained dangling from the end of the scythe's grip. With more words whispered that circle shifted, forming several new, intricate links that connected it with the vambrace on his right arm, before vanishing, as though the chain had never existed to begin with. I didn't know that much about magic seals and rituals, but I was sure it was high-level one.

"What kind of demon could break a seal like this?" I wondered as I tried to comprehend what I had just witnessed.

He looked at me with that mischievous expression, I recognized as being the one he used whenever he decided to make fun of me. "None of which you will ever see." The answer was evasive, but I didn't feel like questioning him further. He already had said that it had been one that was stronger than him. I could only hope that he was right about me never seeing one.

Duo placed the scythe on the bed once more, alongside the other items that I left there before and shot me an inquisitive look.

"I told you that I would help with whatever you might need… and since you didn't really tell me what you need, I thought about what should be useful." I explained sheepishly, hoping I was right on the choices I had made.

He seemed to be very humble, and probably he didn't need much more than clothes, some armor and his own weapon. So, I found a good pair of pants in dark leather, a sturdy pair of boots, large ones so as to allow room for his claws, also, an one-shoulder roman style tunic and girdle. I had no other idea for what he could wear beneath the armor, because of his wings, and that should work with a chestplate with back straps like the one he was using when found, which I hoped to provide a new, better one to him later. Lastly, there was a thick wool cape which had been treated with a specialized wax so as to prevent it from getting dirty or wet. With the exception of the boots, everything had come from my own, personal wardrobe.

I took the cape in my hands and unfolded it, showing it to him, "You probably don't need to be protected from the cold, but once you are hiding, I thought it would be useful…" Duo took it from my hands with a small smile, inspecting it. Thinking now, it might not cover all the length of his wings even folded, they were so long. "Also…" I continued taking out the tunic, remembering the suspicious look I had received from the seamstress when I explained what I wanted her to do. This roman style wasn't a common thing. "I wasn't sure what kind of thing you could use with little difficulty, because of your wings."

His smile faltered, becoming a bit melancholic when he took it. "I used to wear something like that actually, before…" he didn't finish, but the tone he used on the last word, he could only be referring to his life in Heaven. "Thanks… but you don't have to do this, really..."

"I know. I want to. Would you like to go to the armory, to choose an armor that you like?" I offered. I didn't know what he had before, but he had lost everything in that fight, even if it had been just armor and clothes. I wanted to give him these gifts; maybe, it was because I had some hope that he would think of me after he left. I did understand that his staying is dangerous and that I need to let him go, but what I couldn't do, what was impossible to be done, was forgetting about him, was giving up the hope of seeing him again someday.

I was surprised by his sudden proximity, his lips almost touching mine while he whispered. "I will never forget the kindness and compassion you have shown to me."

I couldn't stop myself from joining our lips, starting a tender kiss, as much as I couldn't stop from asking, when we broke apart, "So, it was alright that I did not return your scythe before?"

Duo rolled his eyes in annoyance, but instead of making some joke as I expected, his fingers came to my face, tracing my jawline kindly. "It was ok," he said serious, lifting some of the weight of my remorse off from my shoulders. "You only did what you thought was best... And if you had returned it before, I would have only left… much sooner."

I leaned my face against the palm of his hand, closing my eyes. "But you're still going to leave..."

"I am." He kissed me again, more fiercely and passionate, before abrupt breaking the contact as he averted his eyes, taking a step back.

I caught his hand, suddenly afraid that he would just fly away at that very moment. "So, this is a farewell?" I asked, voice wavering slightly in my trepidation.

He still didn't look at me, but his other hand came to hold mine. "Yes..." he turned my hands to kiss each palm, mimicking the gesture I had done the day before, "This is a goodbye."

The tone of his voice was tender, yet, the resolution of his words, like a vow, almost made my chest feel as though it would explode from the heartache that was growing deep inside with that definitive word. My time with him was nearly at an end, he wouldn't allow me very much more.

I remained still, actionless, watching him step away from me to undress, removing the soft pants in favor of trying on the new ones followed by the tunic and the boots. He made a quick sloppy braid, letting it fall over his naked shoulder. So, he turned to face me with his hands on his waist as if asking for my approval at his figure.

"You look great." I was really glad that everything fit well enough. The dark pants, clinging to his calves and thighs, with the boots served only to refine the perfect and sexy picture of him. Only, I couldn't hide the sadness that I was feeling knowing that he was getting ready to leave. I fervently wished to have some hope, any hope, of seeing him again.

He tucked the scythe into the right side of the girdle before walking toward me. Stopping right in front of me, biting his lips as uncertainty shone in his eyes. Finally, he let a small sigh escape before raising his head and turning his gaze to the doors that lead out onto the large balcony, that overlooked the courtyard. I couldn't figure out what was on his mind.

"Why don't you pick something warmer?" he suggested, his hands sliding down over my chest until they reached my waist. "And a gambeson."

"What for?" I asked, tilting my head slightly in puzzlement. The smile he gave me was full of mischief, telling me of his intention to keep the reason a mystery.

Bewildered, I didn't argue as I moved to find a warmer pair of pants and grabbing a sturdy pair of boots. It was only really cold outside and I wondered if that was where he wanted to go. As long as I could stay with him a bit longer I was happy, so I grabbed the first thick coat that my hands could get a hold of, putting it on. Duo came to inspect it, closing all laces and lifting up the collar until it was a bit uncomfortable around my neck, a strange mood permeated the air around us, making me very curious.

Before I could ask what that was about, he grabbed my wrist pulling me toward the doors and out onto the balcony. It was already dark, the moon was waning, but still giving off enough light to illuminate the contours of the surrounding houses and fields, as well as the black shadow made by the woods; it was a beautiful and somber image.

The demon turned me so that we were facing each other once more, his eyes were intense as he took a moment just staring at me before angling my face to kiss me. It was tender, small slow kisses, as if he was experimenting, carefully biting and sucking on my lower lip. I just melted in his arms, enjoying the kiss and my proximity to him while decidedly ignoring the knot in my guts.

He lifted my arms, putting them around his neck, both of his arms wrapping around me to press my body tight against his.

"Hold tight." He advised and, as I opened my mouth to ask why, his wings rose up and gave a strong beat that launched us into the air.

"Fuck!" was the only thing that I managed to say while I clung onto him for dear life. Even in my most crazy dreams I had ever thought about… flying. It took me several moments until I was able to breathe again. My heart was threatening to beat right out of my chest and I needed to concentrate on his strong arms around me, as well as the graceful rhythmic movement of his wings, in order to calm down a little.

Swallowing hard I finally dared to look around; we were over the darkened depths of the forest, and I could see the dimmed lights from the village, the small contours of the houses and my castle far off in the distance behind us.

"Ar.. ou... ok?" Even with the steady movement of his wings, the cold night air rushing past us threatened to swallow his words before I could scarcely hear them.

I just nodded because, even if I had tried to answer, I probably wouldn't have been able to find my voice at that moment anyhow. Seemingly in response to that, Duo started to increase the beating of his wings. I wondered if he had been waiting for me get used to the sensation of being airborne before flying the way he would normally prefer. The grip of his arms, up and down my back, was painful yet, at the same time, reassuring, I was happy to feel the safety of his fierce embrace.

"...at's it… relax… enjoy..." The words reached my ears and I could hear the enjoyment lingering in his tone. Suddenly, he changed the angle of his wings to catch an updraft, taking us straight up, higher and higher. There was a fluffy grayish cloud, that hung low in the air before us, and we flew into it. I was surprised to discover that the thing was almost like being inside a mist. The few times I had spared some thoughts looking at the clouds in the sky, they had appeared to be more… solid, as if it was possible to reach out to touch and mold them into whatever shape was desired.

I risked opening one hand, extending it a bit, my other arm still firm around Duo's neck, attempting to see if I truly could touch them, but all I felt was the freezing chill of that ethereal mist making my fingers go numb. Even so, "...'s… mazing…" I tried to say and I found my chin trembling with cold, yet the words carried away as they were by the wind, they reached Duo's hearing.

"Yeah…" he agreed with a satisfied laugh.

There was no way I wouldn't notice how much he was enjoying the flying. I wondered if the level of my pleasure matched his. I couldn't find that hint of sarcasm that was normally present when I amused him in some way. It was such a stark contrast from everything I'd come to expect from him so far, that I couldn't help but wonder what else could make him as happy as he appeared to be in that moment, what else could give him that same level of pure, unfettered joy.

Below us, was just a fathomless, black abyss. Only upon the faint, tangy odor of salt reaching my nostrils did I realize we were soaring above the sea. I couldn't believe how fast we had traveled so far. Under normal circumstances, it would take more than a half day traveling in a fast horse lope to reach the cliffs that border the ocean from my castle. I needed to concentrate to see beyond the tears that the wind insisted on forming in my eyes, so that I could define the glittering, asymmetric lines of silver, languidly formed by the moonlight reflected down upon the water's surface. It was astonishing and peaceful.

"Ready?" Duo asked abruptly, not waiting for the answer as he shifted his center of gravity, pitching us slightly upward, followed by the angle of his wings, causing us to go into a spin before adding, "...to the fun part?"

I barely had time to swallow the thick saliva in my mouth before he took us into another spin with a bright crystal laugh. Duo then angled us straight up once more, wings beating strongly, making my stomach come to my mouth. It felt as though the further we climbed, the less air there was to fill my lungs with, making it really hard to breathe. We were still going higher than I had ever imagined being possible, flying really fast, the rustle of his wings loud in my ears.

Suddenly his grip around me became markedly stronger. I tried to look up at him and saw a devilish smile pull at his lips, his eyes brightening as if to become twin beacons of amethyst light in the darkness and he gave me a look that spoke of nothing beyond pure joy before he simply stopped beating his wings.

For a moment we continued our soar upward, carried by our momentum, before we came to an almost lazy stop. Then, before I had the time to even think to voice my questions about what was happening, we began to fall down towards the earth once more. His wings circled around our bodies to form a protective shield, the movement causing us to spiral uncontrollably as we hurtled toward the ground in a death-defying descent.

I was sure that my heart had stopped in that moment. With another subtle movement of his back we were spinning on the other axis, turning so the earth seemed to be simultaneously above and below us, until we ended up falling headfirst toward the darkness of the ocean below. Turning my focus to Duo once more I could see he had his head thrown back slightly and eyes closed as he enjoyed the sensation of free fall, and I tried to do the same, placing all my trust in him. Not that I had any other choice anyway.

I released the breath that I hadn't realized that I had been holding and turned my gaze down toward the ocean, I tried to just feel the sensation of... releasing, through the pressure in my chest. I hadn't noticed that he had loosened his grip around me, nor that I had my own on him in relaxation until he tightened his arms once more, pulling me even closer if that was possible. I didn't miss the clue and responded in kind as best I could; we were still falling and alarmingly close to the water.

Duo let out an excited cry and opened his wings all of a sudden, causing our bodies to jolt in shock as his wings fought wildly against the wind, providing the attrition to stop our insane free falling. It is possible I let out a cry of my own, along with him, colored by the fear that he wouldn't be able to stop our descent completely before we crashed into the icy water.

Duo did stop, although not before we were unnervingly near the water surface. Through the blood pounding in my ears, I could hear him laughing out loud. It was a sound of pleasure that left no room to doubt that he adored doing that. And baffled as I was by the myriad sensations I was experiencing I could tell, that I surely had loved it as well.

We were flying steadily then, his wings moving slowly, rhythmic, soaring very near the water, it seemed as though we were sailing across the ocean, skimming along the tops of the long, slowly cresting waves.

"Ar.. ou... ok?

His voice reached my ears over the sound of lapping water, however, I couldn't find my voice, my throat completely dry. Duo gently placed his lips on my forehead, "Shit, yer freezing..."

Indeed I was, so much so that I couldn't feel the extremities of my body. I raised my head to find his lips with mine, murmuring into his mouth "It's ok…" His arms shifted around me, trying to envelop me better and he said sorry back at my mouth and trembling broken lips.

Before I could try and tell him not to apologize, because I wasn't sorry at all, we are back at my castle, inside my chamber in the same amount of time it took for me to blink. I was perplexed, incapable of understanding that swift change of scenery. I stumbled with the stone floor arising beneath my feet, falling to my knees.

Duo left for a moment, returning swiftly with a blanket, his hand rushing to undo the laces of my coat, stripping me of it and putting the blanket over my shoulders. I simply remained still, shivering as I was while kneeling on the carpet in front of the fireplace. The demon extended an open hand in direction of the dying fire and it sprung back to life, the flames bright and strong as they licked at the wood. I was glad for the warmth and even more so when settled behind me, pulling me to sit between his legs, wrapping his arms around my trembling form in a gentle embrace. He had taken off the tunic and even through the blanket and my inner shirt I could feel his body heat. My breath was coming in ragged gulps and I tried to calm it, letting him hold me tight to him.

"Sorry… I wanted to give you a gift." He murmured softly, his voice full of remorse.

I needed to tilt my head back to find his eyes, "Don't apologize..." my voice was hoarse and I needed to fight with my throat to finish "... it was… the best gift I have ever received… thank you, truly."

Duo give me a bright smile, and I could see so clearly how much he loved flying, we shared a languid kiss while his hands started rubbing my arms, trying to provide more heat through friction. I almost wanted to suggest that he experience would be even greater in the summer months, however, I didn't want to sound like I was trying to pressure him into staying when he had already so clearly made up his mind. I couldn't be sure, but I guessed he had felt my inner turmoil because he redoubled his effort in kissing me, as if to draw my attention away from my thoughts.

"You really love that, don't you?" I asked softly when we broke the kiss.

"Flying? Yes…" He answered warily, but his violet eyes darkened, turning to gaze out the window as they took on a melancholic look. "Angels are used to flying only in the way we did at the end, just appearing wherever they need to travel… before, there were many times that I ran to Earth so I could actually fly… the others never understood the feeling of it. So, I'm really happy that you enjoyed it… it was good to share this feeling with someone."

A silence filled the space around us, disturbed only by the crepitating of the fire. I was glad to have been able to help him, to have one more thing that he could share just with me. "It was the best thing I have ever done in my life… another amazing memory of you, Duo." My voice sounded thick, more emotional than I wanted.

"Let's get you to the bed." He suggested, already standing and pulling me with him. I wasn't shivering anymore and went along with him. When we stopped at the side of the bed, I reached to touch his wings reverently, feeling the softness with my fingers. "Duo…"

I started but he stopped me by placing a finger over my mouth, however, I took hold of his hand before he could, trying for one last attempt, not to keep him here, but to change the resolution of how definitive this goodbye was. I wanted to have some hope, even if it was only a tiny one that I would get to see him again someday.

"Please, stay with me one last time… let me give you something else…" It sounded almost like a plea, said with a thick hoarse voice, and maybe it was. He might 'read' well my feelings, still, I wanted to show him how I felt. Maybe, I could make him see that he was all I wanted, that I already had lost my heart to him. Maybe, I could give something else to remember me by after he left, "Let me love you." _[14]_

Those gorgeous amethyst eyes widened in surprise as he stood perfectly still in shocked silence for a second. I had noticed that he usually was more flexible if I didn't hold back my feelings, so, even though it was a bit manipulative on my part, I just lay them bare; maybe seeing what I felt deep he would be more inclined to agree.

Duo bit his lower lip, it was adorable the way he appeared uncertain, it warmed my heart to see his indecision, the way he fidgeted on his feet. He probably had planned to just get me back and leave, so, I didn't expect him to place his scythe aside, getting the boots off and crawling on the bed and lying on his back, his honey long hair spilling over the sheets, the braid totally undone by the flight, and his black shining wings sprawled along the mattress with that dark green glow inside completing a surreal picture of him.

I needed to breathe deep and slow due to the sight he made, hands stretched out in open invitation. I accepted, taking his hands and entwining our fingers, straddling his hips as I settled over him. He had that lopsided smirk that I found endearing when he pulled me down for a kiss, it was slow and passionate. I poured in it all I felt for him, including the ever mounting sorrow and the longing I was sure I would suffer after his departure.

I kissed all his face, sliding my lips down along his neck until his shoulder, biting the muscle at the junction of them, feeling his moans deep in his throat with my lips. His hands slid to my back pulling my shirt over my head in a rush, claws grazing at my skin. I let him remove it, but after, I pinned both of his hands on each side of his body; I didn't want to hasten anything. I wanted to relish this last time with him, more than that, I wanted to imprint my feelings on his body, on his skin. I wanted to feel like he was mine even if it was for just one time, because, beyond question, I already was his; whether he accepted it or not.

Duo relaxed completely, letting me hold him on the mattress, his crystalline laugh filling my ears and his amethyst eyes bright with understanding. I brought my hand to his face, enthralled by his fascinating smile, my thumbs tracing his cheeks. He closed his eyes leaning in while I caressed his hair, brushing his bangs back to kiss his forehead reverently, "You are so incredibly beautiful."

His smile faltered a bit, but he didn't argue. I kept going, kissing both of his temples, his cheek, his jaw, on my way to his neck and chest. I felt the breathing movement under my lips, his chest going up and down, strong muscles beneath the soft skin. "Inside and out..." I whispered, nuzzling around his nipple.

"No, I'm not… you don't know enough about me to say that kind of thing." One of his hands came to hold my chin up so I could see the serious expression in his eyes.

"It's not about what you have done… it's about what you are. And still, not really knowing it, I can feel; I can see inside those beautiful eyes of yours, you are special."

Duo turned his head to the other side, incapable of finding words to answer he was just running from it. I rose to hold his face and whispered against his lips that I was sorry. It was a lie, but I was afraid of ruining the mood; I didn't want him sulking, didn't want to have this goodbye tainted with any bad feelings. I kissed him, not wanting him to think about my lie. I needed some insistence until he started kissing back and his arms came around me, grabbing and pulling me near until I was all lying on him. It became a long and deep kiss, his lips were swollen when we broke, as mine should be, and his face was gorgeous flushed and at ease again. After all, it's all about him feeling good, feeling loved.

It was obvious that, somehow, physical contact made him less defensive, and this is the only kind of intimacy that he would allow. Seemed to me that he didn't feel free enough to allow the emotional part, even both of them were clearly tangled together.

I kissed the ending of his shoulder, gently pushing him to one side. Duo arched an eyebrow in question, but rolled to lean the way I wanted. I brushed his long hair aside, while I kissed over his shoulder, tracing a path onto his back, lightly nuzzling his nape and descending down the spine line, before letting my fingers linger on the soft black feathers. I bit the skin at the base of his wings, feeling how strong the muscles there were. Yet his body was lean, he was so strong; everything was right in place, all sinew and muscles; all perfect.

My hands were slowly sliding over the softness of his feathers in a gentle caress, before skimming his skin at the sides of the waist and down to his hips, making him shiver and arch his back graciously. The sound of his claws tearing the sheets, when my tongue reached the small of his back, telling me all I needed to know about him enjoying it.

Yet, Duo surprised me, undoing the laces of his pants with trembling fingers, pushing them to his knees and staying in the same position. Not sure what he was wanting, took me a second to continue my way kissing down. Then, when I went farther between the crack of his cheeks and I let my tongue massage his sensitive part, his husky voice calling my name erased the doubts that I had, and I made him fight to stay still, squirming anxiously, by me rimming on him. "Heero..."

I gently pushed him backward until he was lying prone on the mattress and finished removing his pants. I positioned myself between his lean legs, sitting on the balls of my feet as I took hold of his slim hips to pull his body until he was straddling my waist. This new positioning of our bodies, with his hips over my thighs, granted him some measure of leverage over the mattress that made his abs tense. Slowly I shifted my hand to slide along the strong muscle beneath the velvet skin, feeling the strength within. His left hand grasped at my tights, as he hissed in pleasure. There was a sharp, stinging sensation as his claws began to dig into flesh, which I really didn't care. I had never beheld such a vision of perfection as Duo presented me at that moment, as he gazed back up at me with an unreadable expression. His dazzling amethyst eyes were clouded in an inscrutable mix of emotion. A light blush had risen to color his cheeks as his breath came in short, soft puffs of air. He was the very definition of exquisite and I was completely lost. The sharp tang of his scent, reminding me of fire and brimstone, the savory and comforting smell of cloves and cinnamon, the feeling of his skin, the warmth of his body, I wanted to have all those sensations permanently burned into my memory, as if engraved by fire. Carefully I brought his left leg up to my shoulder, so I could nip and kiss at his ankle, my lips traveling along his calf, toward the side of his knee. His wings were spread to their full and brilliant glory, the lustrous, dark feathers glistering softly in the light from the hearth as they dipped down beyond the edge of the mattress. Experimentally, I gently bit the side of his leg, causing him to let out a small gasp of surprise as he squirmed and shifted, struggling to remain still as he shivered at the sensation, toes curling in what I could only assume was pleasure. _[15]_

"Heero…" His voice was hoarse when he called my name and I loved to hear it like that, as a plea, full of need. He was fully aroused, the slit dripping with precum and I knew that he was near his limit, so I left, for only a moment, to reach the oil on the bed stand. I intended on preparing myself, but when I dipped two fingers in the oil, he astonished me, grabbing my wrist anxiously and maneuvering my hand between his inviting legs.

"Duo… when I asked you to let me, I didn't mean- You don't need to-" I whispered, surprised to find my own voice, even not being able to finish the sentence. It hadn't crossed my mind to change our roles with that request, I just wanted to be with him again, whatever way he wanted to.

"I know," He gasped, cutting in abruptly. He turned his head to the side, averting his eyes, making a long pause, wondering, maybe choosing the words before finally saying in a low, almost shy, voice. "I want you."

I hadn't thought that I would hear him say something like that, I truly didn't expect it and my whole body was filled with warmth, making my heart race. Yet it wasn't a confession of love, it meant a lot because it was true and I could see that he meant it, it was obviously hard for him to say those words. I leaned down to kiss him passionately, my hands wrapping around his waist and back, to bring him closer, embracing him tighter than I could. When we broke, Duo had a sweet, shy smile, a short slipping of his mask, that was fast fixed with his legs wrapping around me, making our hips grind together and whispering in my ear. "Come on… don't make me wait…"

This change of his was so intrinsic a part of him, at the same time it was clearly his way out to hide himself. I wanted to tell him so many things. However, I knew better, he would stubbornly fight each and every one, so, I just kept my mouth shut and stayed on that only path that he had allowed me to walk on.

I started to massage the soft skin of his perineum and around his entrance. I held both of his legs over my shoulder; the sight of him gasping, eyes hooded and heavy-lidded, his own hand shoved in his mouth, as a vain try to not moan, was enough to get me painfully hard. I kept delivering butterfly kisses on his calves and ankles while preparing him until he was squirming too much, trying to move to get more contact with my fingers inside him. When I found a sensitive spot inside him, his hand grabbed my leg hard, the claws breaking the skin beneath the fabric of my pants.

"Enough…" he managed to say with his hard breathing, suddenly grabbing my arm to stop me; his clutches leaving stains of blood in my pants that he for sure didn't notice.

I reached for the laces of my own pants to open them and tugged my hardness with some oil. He was eager, trying to pull me with his legs, barely waiting for me to get in position, I needed to grab his hands pinning them to the mattress again. "I'm here…" I whispered brushing my lips on his, gazing at his beautiful eyes.

Duo simply relaxed under my touch and my feelings, allowing me to slide slowly and with ease inside him and it was amazing. He was just so damn hot; holy hellblood, his channel was insanely warm and soft as velvet. I was the one almost losing control, gasping and grabbing his hips to keep him in place, needing a minute after being fully seated into him to not lose myself in that blissful moment.

When I could get my world back at the axis, I found his eyes gazing at me, full of amusement and with that mischievous smirk on his lips. "Already melting?"

His smile increased as my face became hot, at least I was glad for getting myself under control before... I melted. I didn't let myself get caught in embarrassment or by the playful line he was trying to force in. I could see the light in his eyes, behind that joker mask, and that was the one that I wanted to reach, so I rather wanted to play with the honesty and sweetness. "Don't worry, not yet..." I let my hand cup his face gently, "Duo... I'm not sure that you won't burn me away."

I was not sure if it was the words, the feelings or the tone of my voice, but it worked at replacing that smirk with a small smile as he leaned on my hand, closing his eyes. I needed this lovemaking to mean something more to him, and I didn't want him running away from that. I leaned, kissing his collarbone, letting my hands reach his, palm against palm, tangling our fingers. I felt, through my chest, his heart thundering, mirroring the beat of my own. We looked at each other and I saw his eyes wide open, full of bare feelings for the first time; he was scared, only I wasn't sure about what.

Duo let go of my hands to reach my face, pulling me up to join our lips. We kissed tenderly, letting our tongues raveling, dancing, exploring with no hurry. I wanted him to feel cherished, wanted him to feel like he was deserving of this tenderness, this caring, and this love. I didn't part our lips to start moving; keeping our mouths connected as also our eyes, testing shallow thrusts at first. His legs came to entwine at my back, his hands to grab at my shoulders pulling me closer, making my movements become deeper, trying to get more contact.

As I increased the pace, he closed his eyes, throwing his head back and arching graciously his body. He used his wings to get leverage, and with a vigorous movement, I found myself sitting up, with him on my lap and I was deeper seated inside him. A loud moan filled the room; I wasn't sure which of us let it out. His claws were scratching my shoulder blades; the thought that he might be bothered when seeing it, like the last time, crossed my mind idly. The myriad of feeling that I was lost in, pain wasn't included at all.

I had access to the sensuous line of his neck to lick and bite there; the reverberation of his sweet moaning reaching my lips through his throat. He was lightweight, even completely surrendered with such abandon in my arms. I was barely capable of breathing, completely captivated by him at that moment. It was a gift to see him like that, freed of all shadows, without all the ghosts of his mysterious life, holding me for dear life, like I was the only anchor keeping him from losing himself. On top of that, I wanted to be that for him, I wanted to be anything that he needed.

"Heero…" his husky voice came with a gasp, as he buried his face on the crook of my neck, his wings circling us, making that soft shelter around us, as if the contact of our skins weren't enough.

I kissed the side of his face and dipped my nose in his rich brown hair, it was slightly damp at the roots, having more of that comforting cinnamon scent. "I'm here..." I said, the words dripping with passion. Those exotic eyes turned to me, covered by the curtain of his bangs, even they were clouded by desire, something flickered inside them, I knew he was looking for something, just still not knowing what. I just wanted to sink my soul in those mysterious amethyst pools forever. As each thrust wrought a deep groan that evolved into mewlings and then into soft cries, "I'm here..." I repeated, unsure of what was going on inside his mind, but somehow he appeared to need that reassurance.

I was right because next, he was abruptly kissing me, hungrily trying to devour my mouth, possessive and demanding, a bit desperate maybe, his fangs cutting my lips. The metallic savor of blood prickling my tongue, as he moved to meet every thrust, rocking his hips hard. Having that beautiful, strong and exotic being unraveled that way, raw and honest was surreal. I knew I would have him in my heart for the rest of my life.

One of his hands came to grab my hair, pulling it to make my head bend slightly back, so he could kiss my jaw and neck, biting my Adam's apple. The movement, opened some space between the sweaty skins of our chest, leaving me room to reach for his hard and dripping wet erection that had been trapped between us.

Even if I wanted to draw it out I knew I couldn't, and if his cries were any indication, Duo was also near the edge. Wasn't long when, under my ministrations, his flesh was throbbing and twitching in my hand. His cries became louder, then turned in a keening of my name. Even distracted, his lips found mine again, making me swallow his sounds. He came while kissing me, tasting of blood and passion, clinging on me fiercely, closing his eyes and with his wings open, showing their glorious darkness glimmering with that vibrant green energy and the fading yellow from the fire.

I didn't have time to think much, being taken by him to the edge of pleasure with him squeezing me, impossibly tight, sucking me in, overwhelmed by the contrasting feelings inside my heart: completeness and loss. I buried my face in his collarbone, lost in the moment when the orgasm hit me, in a way that I had never felt before. I might have shouted his name, but not sure if any coherent sound left my throat.

I probably lost consciousness for a moment. Next thing I would know was that even after I opened my eyes I couldn't see a thing. Took more than a couple of deep breaths, for my senses to start to turn back on and it was like they came one by one, slowly. First the heat of his skin under me; second, the sound of the fast beating of his heart; third, the acrid scent of our completion; fourth, the sight of his eyes heavy-lidded, looking kindly at me; and lastly, the bitter taste of longing that already was lasting on my tongue.

I needed to wait for the rush of blood in my veins to calm down, to notice that we were lying on the mattress, Duo on his back and I, in complete abandon, all over him. I felt like I was totally incapable of moving. The weakness of my body, mixed with the adrenalin and cold from the flight and all that activity surpassing all my physical limits.

"Stay… just stay like this…" he whispered slowly, I had an impression that his voice was thick emotional, but my brain wasn't really working anymore. Not that I could move even if I wanted, I was more than happy to oblige, and just remain in the comfort I was.

"Duo…" I wasn't even sure what I wanted to say, was more just an attempt of fighting against the sleepiness possessing my relaxed and weak body.

"Shhh… sleep, Heero… just sleep..." With the feel of his fingers caressing my hair gently, I lost that battle, letting myself into the dreamland, forgetting that it was the last time I was rushed to sleep in his warm arms.

" _I say it's up to fate"_

* * *

 _Diana Lua_

 _Diana C. Figueiredo_

 _Written in: May and Jun/2016 and Sep, Oct and Nov/2017_ _\- Published: Apr/26/2018_

 _Beta reader: SFA (Feb and Mar/18) and Cylina Nightshade (Mar and Apr/18)_

 _Last change:_ _Apr/26/2018_

* * *

 _ **Notes:**_

 _[14] This is dedicated to my darling Marl Paz, some words from the music 'Let me love you', by Schiller, that she like very much._

 _[15] I drew this scene, it was in the facebook album (link on my profile), as a project that I need to use a technique with high contrast and hatching, not ready yet, but I'm finishing. This was also my first time doing all lines on the computer, so, it's a style a bit different, but I'm liking it very much._

* * *

 _# Well, there is no much what I can say but I'm sorry for this other long delay. Since Christmas, I have been working like crazy, and this chapter has a thing that makes me write and re-write it many times and, also, SFA made me re-write the whole thing twice, after all my many re-writings. This flying scene was the one that inspired all the story, so I needed it be perfect. And also was a crucial thing have them apart from each other in the right way. So, yeah, took me a long time to get it the most perfect I could._

 _# I'm also very sorry for it be so long, I don't like chapters long like this, but I couldn't get it smaller._

 _# Other thing is, sorry for the lemon(?). Well, both SFA and Cylina, would prefer they cuddling instead having sex, but I stubbornly wanted they having this goodbye sex, so if you think that it not fitted well, is all my fault. After having my artwork becoming so nice there is no way that I would cut off this scene. The drawing is the new cover for the story, and you can see it in my public facebook album, one of the best things I ever drew._

 _# Thank you very much_ SFA _,_ Negasonic Teenage Warhead, ShenLong1, Io and Marl Paz _for the reviews and support. Really sorry to make you wait for this long!_

 _# I'm already working on chapter 9, it is a transition chapter so will not be big and hope will not take long too. If someone was following Ónoma too, the chapter 7 just after chapter 9 of this one because I need to keep up some of those long delays here._

 ** _So, sad about the goodbye? I don't need to tell that, besides sounding like definitive for now, it's not... ne? ^_^  
Let me know what you are thinking..._**


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